Stupid human tricks

“What's your unusual talent?”

“What happens when you have a loose cannon in you World of Warcraft campaign? Why the funniest frickin’ nerd fight ever.

My favorite part:

“Leroy you are just stupid as hell!”

“Least I have chicken.”


Leeeeeeeroy Jeeeeeeeenkins! [video: rated R for language but work safe]”

“Hillarious. Poor old lady. Can't even get a slice of pie without pissing people off.”

“She's lucky she didn't get tasered.”

“Yet another Jeditard. Someone should tell him Jedi Masters don’t have man boobs.

Clean, work safe direct link:
http://www.m90.org/gallery/video/jediretard0-3764.wmv”

“Time to put grandma in a home.”

“or the ground!











Okay, let me have it”

“Bass turd!”

“I guess this could happen to anyone, but...

Yesterday afternoon, I was getting the mail and bringing the garbage can around back, when I noticed what looked like part of a cellphone in the road in front of my house. Hmm, thinks I, that looks like the frontplate. I picked it up. I looked around a bit more. There's the keypad. Picked that up. Ooh, there's the body. Picked that up. Battery's missing...oh wait, there it is. Picked that up. Just missing the backplate now. Oh, there it is, it managed to bounce up into my yard.

I took it inside, put it back together, and turned it on. Amazingly, it still worked. I looked through the contact list until I found the listing for "Home", and then I called that number. I explained to the man who answered what had taken place, and gave him my phone number. His wife called me back later to say that she had left her phone on the bumper of her car, and forgotten that it was there before she left with her daughter on some errand. She was very glad to get the cellphone back.”

“I was doing some man-ironing (through the pants in the dryer to get the wrinkles out) and accidnetly ran my LG through a 1/2 hour spin in the drier. Still worked.”

“Amazing that they can make cellphones that can go through that, but PalmOne cannot build a cheap PDA that will survive a day in my pocket.”

“...or OFF with your heads! One hour til quittin time.”

“note to self: don't stowaway in Gem's bear canister.”

“Asking Politely Must Not Have Worked

GENEVA, Ill. (AP) — A 46-year-old man allegedly set his own home on fire in order to get two visitors to leave, police said.

Dean Craig was charged with felony arson after allegedly splashing rubbing alcohol on the floor of the two-story home in Aurora Township and using a lighter to ignite the fire around 1 a.m. May 29, the Kane County Sheriff's office said.

When authorities arrived at Craig's home, which is owned by his mother, it was engulfed in flames, police said. Craig and his two guests were not injured.

Craig allegedly had asked two visitors to leave, but when they refused, he threatened to light his house on fire, police said.

Craig is scheduled to appear in court on June 9.

Third story”

“Woman Sells Forehead on eBay



SALT LAKE CITY (AP) — For $10,000, Kari Smith has had her forehead tattooed with the Web address of a gambling site.

Smith, 30, who sold her unusual advertising space on eBay, said the money will give her 11-year-old son a private education, which she believes he needs after falling behind in school.

"For the all the sacrifices everyone makes, this is a very small one," she said. "It's a small sacrifice to build a better future for my son," she said.

"To everyone else, it seems like a stupid thing to do. To me, $10,000 is like $1 million. I only live once, and I'm doing it for my son," she said.

Tattoo artist Don Brouse said he and his staff spent nearly seven hours Wednesday trying to talk Smith out of putting "GoldenPalace.com" above her face.

When he did go through with it, he kept the inch-tall letters close to her hairline, where bangs or a hat could provide some cover.

Smith's eBay auction attracted more than 27,000 hits and 1,000 watchers. Bidding reached $999.99 before Goldenpalace.com, an Internet gambling company in the Mohawk Territory of Kahnawake, Canada, met Smith's $10,000 asking price.”

“The human condition never ceases to amaze me.

Hey..I've got a bald head, maybe I should offer that up on Ebay. Any potential advertiser could see the benefit as you would get more bang for your advertizing dollar.
Do I hear $1? Who will make it $2?”

“Note to Ruby...

this is not a fluffer!”

“It may have to be awarded posthumously ...”

“http://fun.from.berdyczow.org/2004-05-26/posmeraj-goscia-w-nos.swf

move the cursor”

“Okay, that made me laugh.”

“Arrrgggggggggggggg!!!!!!!!

I'm driving down a nice FIVE lane road with the center lane as a turn lane and what do I come upon?
One wingnut driving a riding lawnmower down the center of the rightmost lane and a minivan full of kids with the left turn signal on blocking the other lane.
The idiot driving the minivan wasn't even into the center turning lane. It's like she didn't even know what it was for.

ARGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

“thats what you get for living in the south”

“Hell, up here we just run`em over. That always learns`em.”

“LOL..@Laqtis

Stove...I may have told you on the six or so weeks following 9/11 we had people blocking parking lots so we could go down the street to calls.

Then about 4 or five months after we are on a call in the Aerial Truck (HUGE MONSTER) and we are on a 5 lane road. Cars have pulled to the left as they are required to. There are cars in the Suicide lane...and one little old granny (NY tag) going 27 in the left lane. She keeps looking in her rear view mirror like "WTF are you doing back there?"

We finally were able to go around her. But that is driving in general....”