How do you dump her?

“The grade school threads of, "I like you. Do you like me. Check yes or no" are obviously relevant, but who has a fool proof way of telling that not-so-special person, enough is enough?”

“Stop brushing your teeth.”

“Just tell her "You need someone with lower standards."”

“Just start f**kin somebody else. If they find out, so what.”

“Slip out the back, Jack
Make a new plan, Stan
Don't need to be coy, Roy
Just listen to me

Hop on the bus, Gus
Don't need to discuss much
Just drop off the key, Lee
And get yourself free”

“Just tell her the truth.”

“Give her the
Lets just be friends
speech.”

“You sound like you've done that before DM99.”

“The truth doesn't always work.

"Oh, you are just saying that because... fill in the blank"”

“1.) pay off all joint debts
2.) give her the house
3.) take all the stuff that was from your family
4.) move into a rat hole
5.) negotiate a separation agreement including paying alimony for a limited time - be sure to get the time limit in there (3 years or less is good) and child support (nothing you can do here you are screwed by the book on this one) but make sure you cover all possibilites that might terminate the child support early including child runs away, graduates high school, gets married, joins armed forces, delares emanicapation, etc.
6.) every pay period enjoy the knowledge that your addict of an ex is using the child support money to support the habit of the day
7.) suffer through the rest of the sh!t that goes along with not being there for your kids including things like learning that a twenty year old drug dealer has moved in with your fourteen year old daughter and is f^cking her with the knowledge and consent of her mother
8.) threaten to get the law after said drug dealer only to have daughter and drug dealer run away together
9.) go hiking a lot to try to deal with the pain
10.) survive the next few years still paying child support for daughter because you did not include running away in the separation agreement as a termination clause for the child support”

“Take it easy HOG.

Been there done that. I am not talking about a ex-wife. I am talking about the ex-girlfriends who screw up my chances with new pu$$y.”

“I'm a heart breaker”

“Tell the truth..........yuck!!!!


1.) pay off all joint debts
2.) give her the house
3.) take all the stuff that was from your family
4.) move into a rat hole
5.) negotiate a separation agreement including
paying alimony for a limited time - be sure to get
the time limit in there (3 years or less is good) and
child support (nothing you can do here you are
screwed by the book on this one) but make sure
you cover all possibilites that might terminate the
child support early including child runs away,
graduates high school, gets married, joins armed
forces, delares emanicapation, etc.
6.) every pay period enjoy the knowledge that your
addict of an ex is using the child support money to
support the habit of the day
7.) suffer through the rest of the sh!t that goes
along with not being there for your kids including
things like learning that a twenty year old drug
dealer has moved in with your fourteen year old
daughter and is f^cking her with the knowledge
and consent of her mother
8.) threaten to get the law after said drug dealer
only to have daughter and drug dealer run away
together
9.) go hiking a lot to try to deal with the pain
10.) survive the next few years still paying child
support for daughter because you did not include
running away in the separation agreement as a
termination clause for the child support
HogOnIce


NO NO NO NO!!!!

Sell the house the 2 of you own. pack up the belongings and tell her you need her to "sign" the check so you can deposit it into the joint account.

Take her to breakfast and talk real sweet about how the new house is gunna be...............right before the check comes...........off to the rest room and .........pull a BRUCE SPRINGSTEEN!!!!!!!


"I went out for a ride and I never came back.
Like a river that don't know where it's goin, I took a wrong turn and I just kept goin."”

“Tell her that she's gained weight.”

“oh - sorry about that bacpac - I guess I took too broad of a view of the question. In the particular case you proposed I don't have any good suggestions. Mostly it depends on how gently you want to dump her - usually it is easier on everyone to break-up in anger - so one possibility is to cause a argument and use the agrument as a reason to break up.”

“Just start answering questions honestly.”

“wow--I am having a hard time believing that you can't come up with just the right words. You have a knack for words, bacpac.”

“No problem HOG, I share your pain.

I have forgotten too soon. Or not. It is a nasty business.”

“yeah that a good one too - "How do I look in this new whatever?" "Oh it doesn't look new or any good on you either."”

“Just say, "you can't be bothered".

It works well on biz.”

“Running Girl, I know the words to speak. How can I make them less painfull and still get the point across?”

“There's no way to make something like that painless but telling the truth gently (alittle bit firmly if she can't get the point) and just staying away from each other should do the trick. Don't call and check up on things and meet for drinks and be friends! Just do it!!!! (as nicely as possible)”

“I'm serious here. Just start banging other chicks. If that don't do it, tell her you wanna have a threesome. If that does work, Why dump her? F**k Fest 2001!!!!”

“There's the old line "I really like you, but I don't love you"

You never give a person reasons why the both of you can't be together because a person can always say, let's work on those reasons.

Best thing to say, "I dont love you anymore".”

“I tell them I want a theesome on the second date. It is the hangers on that I want to get rid of.”

“I know a girl that was cheated on, and the man also told his girlfriend that he wants to leave & marry the girl he cheated with when his job lets him transfer to another state where she lives. The girlfriend still doesn't want to leave.

Sometimes there is no way to get rid of someone without moving to another state.”

“Bury her in a shallow unmarked grave.
MOHAHAHA!!!!”

“FYI, no guy has EVER broken up with me GEAR SLUT. Well, no self respecting one anyway :P

I'm too nice”

“I can't believe you're giving TXWoodswoman the boot this quick.














Neeneer neeneer!”

“bacpac, I imagine one graceful, yet effective way would be to tell her you have a raging case of some incurable VD

? or do you want to tell the truth? Everyone has their standards”

“Biz, I tried that. I live in small circles. Word gets around. I didn't get any pu$$Y for a long time after I told that lie. I can't remember the truth much less a lie.

Honesty is the best policy.”

“oh man. where to start...

well Nigal, the only reason that one is going to slip past Tex is because dear ol' mom is out in the woods! But I must admit..it was worth a good laugh.

and bacpac...from what I hear...you must move in small circles..you insult everyone else too much. My advice? be yourself”

“The more insulting he is, the more charming.

bacpac - (gruffness + hemerroids + sexual frustration) = tehipite”

“Ha, ha, ha, I don't need a fan club GS.

Get lost.”

“I'm not sure GS is a GURL bacpac. She did call herself 'Won Hung Low' once. Slip?

or bad trolling?”

“Gear Slut is a guy. He posted that once.”

“GS is a 'mo.”

“I have never admitted to being either. Draw your own conclusions.

I admire anyone who demonstrates wit. Don't feel singled out bacpac, I'm sure you have many loathable qualities too!”

“Fewer than you obviously, but what the heck. I am a man.”

“magnifying glass?”

“feisty critters aren't we?”

“fiesty critters aren't we?”

“just let her read this thread, she'll get the picture.

”

“If you're running in such a small circle, licking the breasts of another in public might do it--or tell her you JUST DON'T GET IT ANY MORE!”

“Set a date with her and send someone else in your place.”

“ya know the cliche....
an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure?

tell the current p$...er, i mean cat, the truth.....she'll get over it....
then be more selective with the next cat you get tangled up with and discuss upfront (like a prenuptial agreement) your need to be a free spirit so she won't be surprised when you get bored.....don't fall in lust with a "clinger"”

“good grief...i come home from a great night out....it is one a.m. , get into the modem and post a reply that sounds like dear abby on a backpacking forum..............
gotta love those long island iced teas.......%)”

“Gear Slur DID admit to being a guy! I rememeber, if I could just remember where...”

“A 'mo? I love 'mo! He was the origanal! Shem was stupid!

GS is a man. Women don't carry on like that.”

“Never, no never, no never again
will I be in love with you my friend
would that I could flap my arms and fly
than I should ever forget again and try
I won`t play your game, I cannot win
no never, no never, no never again”