Black Pot Phobia

“This has to be the biggest backpacking stigma I have ever come across. I don’t understand the neurosis behind the suet phobia. I’ve read of people not considering certain stoves or fuel simple because it will smudge the bottom of the pot. What, does the bottom double as a mirror or something? You would get less reaction out of a fellow backpacker if you showed up to the trailhead in drag.

[Wavy dream sequence intro]

Nigal: Hey Dirtbag, sup?

Dirtbag Darrel: Not much. Hey, nice feather boa. You ready to go?

Nigal: Thanks. Let’s hit it dude.

[Later that same day at dinner]

Nigal: Yo Dirtbag, can I borrow your extra pot?

Dirtbag Darrel: Sure, here ya go.

Nigal: Is that suet on the bottom?

Dirtbag Darrel: Sweet mother of gawd!!! Quick, gimmie a scrub pad! [scrub scrub scrub] Sh!t! [scrub scrub scrub] I hope it comes off! [scrub scrub scrub] What’ll I do if I can’t get it off! [scrub scrub scrub] I can’t put this in my pack like this! Nigal help me!!!! [srcub scrub scrub]

Nigal: Control yourself man! This is no time for hysterics! Shut up and keep scrubbing! I think we can save it!

So what is it with the black pot phobia?”

“LMAO nigal! Screw it, get the MSR Blacklights and ya won't have to worry about it. All those that feel the need to scrub, must have "the rainman" syndrome. Get used to dirt folks, you are, after all, in the damned woods!”

“I'd never buy black pot.”

“LMAo Buddur!”

“lol.. luv the dream sequence.

to be honest I have not encountered this.. is this some sort of local thing? *ducks*

Indigenous to local species?”

“I own the MSR blacklights and I hate to get them blackened”

“have I just got a good stove? I never have black pots?”

“No problem with soot from most fuels but I do have a problem with that sticky toxic waste coating which comes from all of those different Esbit solid fuel things.”

“You people make me have a good laugh before I have to go to work thank you very much......:)

have a great day everyone......

Mike”

“Try this, black pot cry babies. Rub the bottom of your pot with a bar of soap.

Leave the soot and muck on,it heats the pot quicker.
If you clean it off, you've only gotta clean it off again after you cook.”

“As a Zip Ztove user I always have a well blackened pot including some spots of sticky creosote - no big deal I just put the pot in a couple plastic bags (grocery store type) before putting it in the pack.”

“As an Esbit user, my pot is perpetually black and sooty. It makes me happy, like the guys with the monster trucks who drive them into town covered in mud.”

“What I like is when the creasote and soot get sand and dirt stuck in them and you end up with a gritty, black bottemed pot! Who the heck cares, your hands are dirty already what difference does a bit of soot on yer fingers make?

Nice drama Nige! I couldn't figure out what the bird food had to do with it though! ;o)”

“I use the soot on my fingers to rub dark lines under my eyes to help shade the sun.”

“Ever get carried away, paint yer entire face, and find yerself doing an Al Jolson imitation, Ms.tarabull?”

“when do i get to make a kettle joke?”

“I'm pretty sure that hasn't happened.

OK, here goes... Dumb question...

Isn't Al Jolson white? Help me out here, buddur. Cause I'm damned confused.”

“She's done it! I've seen her; she'll not admit it to you though!”

“aaahhh. OK. Thanks for clearing that up!

Sass - I did, really? Damn, I knew I had too many of your beers!”

“I painted the outside of my pots black! Skeert anyone? =80”

“Here's sumptin' fer tha inside of yer black pots. And don't forget to season yer pot first. Some good cooking tips fer ya's. And could somebody please translate this fer me?”

“MSR made their pots black cus their stoves torch silver pots-”

“LMAO, Nige! I have witnessed this. (uhhh, not the drag part...)

My pots are lucky if the insides get scrubbed on the trail. hehehe
ewwwwww”

“How long has Nigal had this split personality with the drag alter ego thing goin' on?

And do you ever take advantage of yourself on the trail?”

“Mummy didn't hug me enough when I was a little shaver...but Daddy hugged me TOO much!


Wow, that was very therapeutic! LOL!”

“OK, I'll bite. I like my pot green with orange hairs in it. No seeds either.”

“I don't understand how anyone could make a big deal if the bottom of a pot got black...That is just down right dumb.Take a rag and clean it off if it bothers them that much.....:|

Mike”

“If you use Titanium, it turns rainbow colors”

“Actually them blacklight pots ain't black on the bottoms ...well until you use them a time or two.
My wife washes mine in the dishwasher. :) On the trail I usually just boil a little water in my dirty pot and wipe it down with a sponge....I'm not really into scrubbing ...that's why I bought the silverstone.”

“You use a sponge?











Clean freak.”

“Remember when Elaine ran out of her favorite just-discontinued birth control...and Jerry's girlfriend ended up having a huge stash of the sponges?”

“PRIVATE FUZZYTITS! (NIGAL) WHAT IS YOUR MAJOR MALFUNCTION NUMBNUTS? DIDNT YOUR MOMMY AND DADDY SHOW YOU ENOUGH ATTETION AS A CHILD?

NOW DO PUSHUPS MAGGOT!”

“I only wash the inside.
I don't eat off the outside.

If I have to use the damn thing to cook over a fire, it's already black, so, who cares?

It retains all the sand, crap sticks, etc. until it burns off again.

It all has its own dirty on the inside stuff sack.

The End”

“Are you "sponge worthy" Budder?”

“Sponges are the nastiest thing you could ever choose to clean with YUCK!”

“I like to clean my pot with a leaf....And it works real good and I sometimes use dirt or sand or rocks.....”

“Ok...Joy why are sponges so nasty?
I've seen some pretty rank dish towels.
They are very light,I carry two small ones...one for the dirty work and one for the finishing touches. They also soak up spills and what knot...wring them out and they are light again. And they are way cheap!!!”

“Always scrub the outside of your pots. Heaven forbid if you get soot on your TNF day glo jacket.”

“My stove doesn't create soot and it burns like a blow torch. I am thinking of buying another one though.

I still have your address, Nigal, if you are interested in this old whisperlite international.”

“LOL! That was one was my first stove. I hated that POS with a passion. I was going to make a christmas tree ornament out of it til I found someone to buy the thing. 8)

All my pots are blackened and crusty. I love it! That woody smell gets in your pack and sticks to everything. I use the plastic grocery bags too (they make nice water buckets also!).

As for sponges...yuck! Water ain't the only thing they soak up. My lovely wife buys those baking stones from Pampered Chef and I steal the little plastic scraper from them and use that for car camping. Backpacking is leaves and sand all the way.”

“That esbit gunk doesn't come off with sand--it needs hot water and then it comes off easy. I use a grocery bag too.

We're taking our zip stove after Christmas--I figure it will do double duty as a mini campfire. I sprung for a titanium one awhile back.”

“i just use leaves and grass.”

“They call him a wombat, he eats roots and leaves.

Think about it.”

“3M makes a brillo like scouring pad made from recycled plastic (Pre consumer waste), doesn't rust, and is made with bio-degradeable/Phosphorus free soap...I keep one in a plastic baggie and use it to clean pots, spoons and utensils...when it's really nessesary.”

“Bacteria! Ever smell the funk that'll grow in a sponge?”

“I'm thinking of painting a mural on the outside of my cooking pot. Any suggestions? I plan on using lead paint.”

“Paint it black and call it (insert city here) by night.”