Pee Pee Doo Doo

“I got the specimens my doctor wanted, an' he wanted a sample of my pee-pee, an' an' he wanted a sample of my doo-doo, an' he wanted, he wanted a sample of my sperms, an' I got lotsa sperms. I keep them in a big jar! They're really cute, they're like Sea Monkeys. There's 1 that's very big, so I named him Randy "Macho Sperm" Savage, an' he's my favorite. But but but I don't got no more jars for my pee-pee, or my doo-doo, or my sperms, so I'm just gonna give you a pair of my underpants.”

“Thanks, ya rat!”

“I AM NOT FAT!!
I jus got good guts and big hares.
/o:3”

“Don't try to steal screaming monkey stick if you want to keep your pee pee.”

“Naked we come and bruised we go,
soft pastry for the soft worms below

This is my poem for you
Great funky flowing flowered beast

Great perfumed wreck of hell

Great good disease and summer plague

Great God-damned #&%!$ assed mother #&%!$ing freak!

You lie, you cheat, you steal, you kill

You drink the southern madness swill
Of greed

You die utterly and alone

Mud up to your braces, someone new in your knickers?
…. And who would that be?

You know, you know much more than you let on
Much more than you betray

Great slimy angel whore
You've been good to me

You really have

Been swell to me…

Tell them you came and saw
And looked into my eyes
And saw the shadow of the guard receding
Thoughts in time
And out of season -
The hitchhiker stood by the side of the road and
Leveled his thumb
In the calm calculus of reason -”

“The Red Cross could still use your blood! Please donate now if you haven't already. I'd do it myself, but I faint at the sight of a needle.”

“TarpRat will die!”

“i don't think anyone fell for it, anyway...

look out, TarpRat...you shall feel the wrath of the blunt, LOL!”

“lyre!”

“tehe! YOU started it! ;-)”

“FINALLY, a thread that exudes the pure essence of Trail Talk.”

“-”

“Where is this going????


8\”

“What Viol man are you pulling up your favorite gear threads?

(hmmm that prolly explains why the turd was in your backpack)”

“http://www.pennlive.com/news/patriotnews/index.ssf?/base/news/1119000262118470.xml&coll=1&thispage=1

LEBANON - So, you want to buy a house in the country?

Some Lebanon County officials want to warn you that it might stink.

To drive the point home, they are developing a brochure that features scratch 'n sniff manure.

"Farming sometimes means late hours, fertilizer, pesticides and manure," said Angie Foltz, natural resources program specialist for the Lebanon County Agricultural Preservation Board. "This is to educate people that if they have a farmer for a neighbor, they might have manure smells."

The scratch 'n sniff smell, which Foltz called "quite pungent" is coming from a company in Chattanooga, Tenn., called "Print a Scent." Its Web site lists more than 150 scents for sale, including anchovy, toothpaste and ashtray as well as familiar fruits, flowers and foods.

Curtis Kulp, South Lebanon Twp.'s manager, said he thinks the brochure is a good idea because his office gets calls when farmers spread manure in the spring and fall.

Some people "are not aware of what it's like to live in the country," he said.

Richard Kreider, who farms 350 acres in South Lebanon Twp. with his son, said few people complain when he spreads manure, except as a joke, in passing.

"If you move to the country, you take what the country has to offer, and that includes manure as well as wide open spaces," he said.

Robert Wilhelm lives in a small development next to a farm but said the smell has never bothered him.

"Maybe I'm a little more tolerant than most," he said. "I just grin and bear it."

Foltz will base the brochure on a similar one distributed in Ottawa County, Michigan. It tells prospective homeowners they can help farmers by "refraining from unwarranted complaints to local, state or federal governments about generally accepted farm management practices" and "refraining from filing frivolous lawsuits."

The Michigan brochure was co-sponsored by several real estate companies. Aside from making the brochures available at the Lebanon County Planning office and the Lebanon Area Fair, Foltz said she hopes real estate agents will hand them out.

But several local real estate agents said they are unlikely to give prospective clients a brochure that says their new home might smell.

"That's pretty odd," said Kathy Morrissey, sales manager for the Century 21 office on Quentin Road in South Lebanon Twp. "I don't think any Realtor would do that. It's not going to happen here."

Bonita Gettle, a Realtor with Century 21, said the subject never comes up.

"It's just something people know when they get in the country," she said. "It's just common sense if you move next to a farm."”

“We need a damn rat trap.”

“Tarpy! how's it going, dude.”

“And a monkey spanker.”

“How 'bout a TarpRat trap?

LOL.”

“I thought tarpy was banned?!!”

“i know, right, Violin! must be magic.”

“Like totally.”

“what kind of magic? that cheezy pull a rabbit from a hat kind, or the real jesus h. christ miracle kind?”

“gnarly dude. also, i could've sworn he was on a plane to China right at this moment. haha!

if i were a realtor, i would take great joy in giving people poop scratch-n-sniffs! might sell a few less houses, but it would be worth it.”

“the kind of magic where Violin is a troll-azz beeyatch!”

“I oughta sue you.


Its torll-azz beeyatch.
last edited: 6/17/05 3:07:10 PM”

“oh excusez-moi.”

“They should give a course to lycra and mink wearing suburbanites here too.

We have been discovered bgy the 'mink and manure' set and they love to #&%!$ at us proles.

I am - quite seriously - going to kill an urban cyclist one day. It is absolutely inevitable. They ride up hills 4 abreast. I don't live on a suburban street, I live on a road with an 80 kmh (50 mph) speed limit that I share with trucks, tractors, tractor trailers, cars and buses. When I approach I honk so that they'll ride the wheel and half the time I get the bird from some #&%!$ looking back at me and wandering all over the road.

If the milk truck with 40 000 kg of milk is coming the other way I know I'm not doing a header with it and I'm not going to drive into the trees, air bag or no.”

“Researchers in Singapore have developed a paper battery that is powered by urine. Despite sounding gloriously silly, the breakthrough promises a cheap and disposable power source for home health tests for things like diabetes.

Research investment into developing smaller and cheaper chips to process information in disposable health tests has been significant, but they were still reliant on an external power source. The researchers at Singapore’s Institute of Bioengineering and Nanotechnology (IBN) think they have overcome this problem.

The battery is composed of paper, soaked in copper chloride, sandwiched between layers of magnesium and copper. The whole thing, once laminated in plastic, is just a millimetre thick, and 6cm by 3cm in size.

The researchers report that with just 0.2 millilitres of urine the battery will provide around 1.5 volts, with a maximum power output of 1.5 milli-Watts. The performance varies according to the geometry of the battery, and the materials used.

Dr. Ki Bang Lee, lead researcher, sees a big market for the battery. He argues that it could easily be integrated into biochip systems for "healthcare diagnostic applications", making it much easier for people to manage their own healthcare, only going to the doctor when absolutely necessary.

The research was published in the Journal of Micromechanics and Microengineering. ®

http://www.theregister.co.uk/2005/08/15/pee-powered_battery/”

“hmmm...do they have ones for preger tests that run on urine?”

“i'll be back in a few, i've gotta go make some power”

“And if it could run on blood drops they could make self-powered glucose test strips.”