Backcountry Loneliness

“A number of folks on this site and in other backpackers often mention loneliness as their least favorite part of the backpacking experience. Thinair recently mentioned on another thread that when there is too much downtime at camp the loneliness creeps in. I have found the same to be true.

I love the solo backpacking experience. Walking at my own pace, eating when I want, standing and staring at a tree or a bird for as long as I want. Communing with my mind and my maker without interruption. But then at night, in camp, when I would usually be talking about the day's events with my wife, I start to get that heavy hearted feeling of loneliness.

I feel better when the sun comes back up, when there are tasks at hand to occupy my thoughts.

Not looking for solutions, just sharing. Maybe it's good to feel that way every once in a while. Reminds you to be more thankful and to express it more often.

I doubt this part of my backpacking experience will ever fully go away, particularly as my family grows.”

“I don't care for solo trips.”

“I guess I should expound on that.

I don't care for solo trips as I like to shoot the bull at the end of the day. I find I enjoy myself more with a few hiking companions. During the day I do like to hike alone on occaisions.”

“Its been two years since I went alone.

I somehow like the idea that I am the only one experiencing my day.

Night hiking also appeals to me.
It gets me a head start on the trip and immersing myself in the dark gives me a feeling of fearlessness.....kinda like night swimming in deep water......good for the soul?”

“I'm with you on that. I can only be truly satisfied hiking solo as I've never found any one to hike with that didn't slow me down and make me feel like I didn't accomplish what I could have. So I have to go solo a couple times a year. When I go with people I make up my mind up front that I won't get to see and do what I want and that the objective is enjoying the people.

The only problem with solo trips is in the evening, after I'm done hiking, eating supper. The guitar helps out a lot in these times.

I just bought a pop-up camper so I can take my family to Colorado this summer, go on titanic solo day-hikes, and hang out with them in the evening.”

“I don't really get lonely. I do get kind of bored if I get to camp too early. That is the problem with going to places with designated campsites. I am learning to time my hikes so I don't have to hang around a campsite from about 1 or 2 pm until. I would rather be hiking or hanging at the beauty spots when I am solo.”

“I guess I'm lucky in that I never feel like I can't do what I want to do with those I hike with.

I agree Tom, night hiking does rock.”

“Sounds like a great idea Toejam - a base camp of sorts. I really haven't tried night hiking before - at least not on purpose. Might be a good remedy for those long winter nights. Fellow ONF ECTrs - don't be alarmed if you see a Petzl Tikka wandering through the trees across Hidden Pond.

This weekend will be my first big group hike so this will be a new experience for me. To this point I have just been solo or with one or two others.

I usually take a book or magazine to occupy my mind before falling asleep.

I also realize that never having lived by myself contributes to my loneliness. I've always had family, college roommates or wife to chat with in the evenings.”

“Big Coop, you expressed my sentiments exactly. I've never been one who needed a gang to hang out with in the woods, but at the end of the day, another person is a welcome presence. The best balance I've found is a good partner; if they are the right person, the hiking is close to a solo experience and camp is a bit livelier. But I've also come to understand that finding a partner who is available when you are is not always easy and that can become a rationale for not going out for more than day hikes.”

“I find that I enjoy my time on the trail... and solo hiking is a special treat.. (oh my gosh.. did I just say that? I sounded like Martha Stewart!)

I have yet to take a trip tho where I did NOT have people to talk to, either at the end of the day, or as features/shelters were passed.

To be honest, I hope I never do. I don't particularly like crowds, or stupid people.. but I know for a fact that my best trips were the ones were I shared those times with a few good friends!”

“If you have some downtime around camp bring some paper or a small notebook. This is a great time to just write whatever comes to mind. How were the trails you hiked that day? Were how you thought they would be? What did you see? What were the pros and cons of the day? Analyze your gear? What stuff don't you use?
How is the weather? How do you feel being where you are? etc...

Also it helps to camp somewhere and after you set up camp have a small meal and then head out and explore till dark. Just don't get lost! Then come back and have another meal before bed.

One time on a solo hike I pounded out a lot of rugged miles to get to the campsite for the night but still got to camp way before dark.

I set up camp, munched on some food, then took out a map and looked at my surroundings. Went out and bagged Algonquin Peak before bed.

Slept well that night.”

“I prefer to go solo if I'm trying to kick up the mileage. Otherwise I enjoy the company of others at camp.

I work at a hospital and I'm on call 24/7 most of the time. When I solo hike I don't get lonely at night. I like getting away from my dang beeper and my house full of women. (daughters)

I've got to get me a headlamp and do some night hiking.”

“Oh yeah baby! Sign me up for some of that backcountry loneliness! I’ve been feeling like I’m gonna go off my nut the past few weeks and I HAVE TO GET OUT! I’ve had the weekend planned with my buddy and when he called and bailed due to sickness I was so happy I could cry. I was only able to get out once last year by myself and I need a solo trip. Much of my time is spent tending to others and I love nothing better than tending to just me and my wants for a weekend.

I like hiking with another person or two (threes about my limit) but can’t do the group hikes any more.”

“I am still looking for a good trail partner. I am sure you all know the dilemma of finally finding someone you want to backpack with and who is willing to go with you, but don't have the same time off from work. When I camp with my family (wife, nephews, nieces, in-laws) I take very long dayhikes, as you can imagine, and generally no one wants to come with me. Sometimes I meet people who are going to the same location, and we form some kind of loose group. This is nice, and I get to bed early because we don't have alot to talk about.”

“I have bp'd for 20 years this coming March. I would say that approximately 75% of all of my trips have been solo. However, the nights I was alone in camp has been probably less than 30% of the time. I have been fortunate to share camp sites with alot of people over the years from all across the country. On those nights that I have been alone, I have always found that a good book fights the lonliness as well as anything. Also, I have found that the first and second night seem to be the worst and by the third night, I do not experience the loneliness near as much. The time by myself has always given me time to reflect on the beauty of nature and to realize how insignificant I am in the grand scheme of the universe. A reality check like that somehow returns me to the real world in a more "focused" manner. Rambling, but my humble observations.”

“Perhaps I'm a loner at heart, but the loneliness at night has never really been a problem for me....I use the time to meditate, think ponder the universe and work on all the stuff I can never get around to because of all the interference down below (in town) like phone calls, noise, etc.....

The mountains are my "church"...I never seem to get lonely in my church.



Then again, perhaps I have too much "stuff" to work on.......”

“The night hiking I have done has been mostly two trails.

One is in the Cranberry Wilderness which is a 320 mile drive so we like to extend the weekend by hittin' the road in the evening after work.
The only time I use a light is when I hear my feet splashing.

The other is a trail leading up to the Roaring Plains from Laneville, WVa.
That one goes under the trees a lot and is a challenge to light discipline.
I can sort of feel the trail and stay mostly in middle......yeah, mostly.

Its good to work on "scanning" at night to avoid the weirdness of "the blind spot".

”

“I did mostly solo hikes for years, don't like them anymore. Since I have found this site and the group trips, I've become spoiled to having big fun in the camp at night and wouldn't have it any other way. I usually hike during the day either alone or playing "tag" with one other person. I think one of the biggest misconceptions about these group hikes is that everyone stays together...they don't. Everyone goes at their own pace and enjoys the solitude of the day and good company at night.”

“Heck no!



Three words:
sol e tude!”

“Is, you don't have to share your dr--s or bourbon with anybody.

LMAO”

“Amen, Chief Beef!

I prefer Scotch or Irish though.”

“For me, hiking is a social experience. The more the merrier!”

“Thanks for the great responses. As expected, over time folks have found what is comfortable for them. Great to see the varied preferences out there - with the one common element of hiking.”

“As Tom pointed out, there's no reason to quit when the sun goes down. I'll hike well into the night, catch a few winks, hit it before dawn, etc. It's really great if you're moving along mesa or ridge country in the moonlight. Wildlife photography is one of my hobbies. One night I was able to photograph a female mountain lion, in heat, and four male suitors. I was actually in the middle of them. They were all caught up in the moment and acted like I wasn't there. The photos didn't turn out (no flash) that good but I'll never forget the experience. On the moonless nights study the stars, watch the meteors. In other words, don't look within, look outward. It usually takes me a few hours in the beginning of the hike for the "white noise and inner dialogue" to subside. The other thing is to look at the hike as a vision quest. I usually hike the most remote places I can find and as I've stated many times it's usually off-season and off-trail.”

“Keep hiking till almost dark.”

“Loneliness is no worse for me out on the trail than anywhere else and if anything it is easier for me to be out on the trail or camping in the backcountry alone because I feel more interested in my surroundings. I will admit that occasionally I wish I could point something out to a companion or to talk to someone that shares an interest in areas that I am interested in but then I let the moment go and just remember it for myself. Group hikes are OK but I find that I don't notice as much if I am in a group. An area that I find interesting is field botany - an interest which often involves noticing shapes - something I do well if I am in a non-verbal mode - its easier to get in that mode when alone.

shrug - the above sounds sort of crappy but its part of the reason I often go hiking / camping solo.”

“on solo hikes, i usually keep on moving and wandering til dark ,..... just like at home...if it is still day light and nice...i just cant seem to go indoors and settle...so, ....It is dark by the time i find a place to set up, eat, clean up, ...listen to the night sounds while i do all that...look up at the stars. spend a few moments being conscious of the cosmic hum and givin thanks....then I usually crawl into the bag already half alseep.....lonely is an emotion felt while you are awake...so, i most never feel that while solo backpacking.
funny, sometimes i can feel lonely in a large group”

“I think group and solo hiking are two different animals. I like them both, though I tend to be an observer when I'm with a group, although a little frisbee in the middle of nowhere after losing the pack is one of lifes little joys. Solo I tend to figure out what I wanna do next with my life.”

“i have been doing a lot of solo hiking, again. by the way, i have never considered hiking with a dog to be solo hiking. wasn't there a thread on that before?”

“I hike solo out of necesity. I want hiking companions but know no one at my school who will backpack with me. So I must hike alone.

I hear a good book will cure lonliness.”

“I dont have a problem with loneliness I've never hiked with more then a couple people an usually I go alone or with my dog I sometimes can only relax completely when I'm alone I feel like a great weight has been lifted from me no one else to worry with at all but ME that sounds really selfish I know”

“I had an experience with hiking loneliness this weekend. I decided to go to the Sipsey for an overnighter. I hiked in about 2 1/2 hours, found a decent, although a little damp, campsite, and started setting up. I kept myself busy setting up camp, but I couldn't get over the feeling of isolation. Even though I kept seeing people, I still felt alone and was missing my family. I felt better after I had dinner, but later that evening, I had to talk myself out of breaking camp and hiking back to my truck in the dark and going home. I think it would have been better if I had had something to read, or if I had bothered to build a fire...anything but sit there and miss my family. I finally fell asleep, and the next morning, packed up and got home as quick as I could. I told my wife that I'd never go alone again.

The strange part is that when I was younger, I loved being alone. Went out of my way to be alone. But now I guess I just miss being with my family too much.”

“I like solo trips. When I'm in the woods alone, I become one of the animals. I'll go ahead and answer the first comment. I keep my duds on. It dosent matter if it's the small patch of woods behind my appartments or some wilderness area. It's hard to explain, I guess it just feels good not to have to look out for others and be responsible only for myself.”

“bitpusher - I have had an experience nearly identical to yours recently, even down to the hiking times and slightly damp campsite. The feelings I had there are prompted some of my initial comments.

Maybe I'll lean more towards multi-person backpacking and keep my soloing primarily to dayhikes.”

“bitpusher, WE live in the same town. Next time give me a hollar and maybe we can hook up. I'm a "bitpusher" too.”

“Sounds good, MDS. OPIE was talking about the Sipsey again the weekend of Feb. 23-24. If the weather's good I'm thinking about going then too.

Coop...maybe it was the crappy campsite? I probably should have chosen a better one...it was one of the low areas that had just dried up from the rains. But I couldn't go much further, and I didn't want to impose myself on any of the people at the previous sites.”

“I've enjoyed reading all of your comments on this thread.

Thanks for taking the time!

Personally, I've always liked being alone, esp. now with five kids at home...and I know exactly what om means when she talks of feeling lonely in a large group of people.

Loneliness and solitude often have little to do with each other.”