Hey...Where's Marvin Gardens?

“It's okay Tilt, they're not after your DNA.”

“They just want your little swimmers.”

“Earth is suffering from the ADVANCED STAGES of an illegal interplanetary invasion. This has been ONGOING FOR CENTURIES before the direct physical contact made by Council Ambassadors in 1945 and AGAIN in 1954. This is clearly evident to those here who were sent to OBSERVE AND MONITOR conditions, developments and irregularities. Not to cause undue concern or to excite fear YOU NEED TO KNOW that the Reptoid Empire has an invasion force nearing us.

In response to the RAPIDLY DETERIORATING CONDITION of events here on Earth there have been contributed energies and efforts in varying degrees and modalities made by benevolent groups to help us. These groups include Sirians, Vegans, Arcturians, Andromedans AND OTHERS.

Our protectors DESERVE SOME CREDIT because they did interdict an earlier force - the command staff. This object was called the Shoemaker-Levy 9 comet. YOU MAY RECALL it was propelled into Jupiter. Did you think that that was a natural event? With good FORTUNE OUR PROTECTORS will be just as creative with the present threat.

The Reptoid position is that their early access TO THIS PLANET for mining, the genetic upgrading work they have performed on the early indigenous humanoids and their having left the Gray cadre on Earth ENTITLE THEM TO ACCESS now and even to justify their claims of sovereignty. THEY ARE ASSISTED IN THIS by a few evil ambitious men who have "sold out" their fellow Humans and operate under the orders of the Reptoid Empire. These GENETICALLY ENHANCED HUMANS have near complete control of all governments and resources of Earth. Time is running out in the affairs of MAN ON EARTH and there are really very few options left. We feel that we need to bring about the TRANSMUTATION OF MANKIND to grant us collectively the power to EJECT WITH THOUGHT ALONE THE INVADERS of this planet and negate their ability to do MISCHIEF and make trouble.”

“Dang, now where'd I put my tinfoil hat??? Never can find that thing when I need it!”

“Hmmmm, Marvin returns after the Iraqi Information Minister disappears...?”

“I have not disappeared! That is an illusion of your sick mind! There are no Americans in Baghdad, they are all still in Kuwait! The pictures on your lying televisions were all made in Hollywood! Saddam is great! He is laughing at you...what? huh? The Range Rover is ready for the trip to Syria? OK good.

Uh, I have to go now! But I will return, un, next week! Yes, next week!”

“Dang... I was going to say dang.

Them pea-pickin' pod people better keep their tentacles to themselves. Maybe I ought to have my DNA patented like Monsanto or whatever.


Oh Cool! I get to whip out some SL-9 trivia!

Fragment G (the beeeeg one) of Shoemaker-Levy 9 (1993e) expended
~500,000 times as much energy as the Tunguska event when it impacted on Jupiter (the equivalent of ~6 teratons of TNT).

(that's a LOT of Hiroshimas)”

“I was bornd in 1954! Yikes!!!!




MOMMMMMMMEEEEEEEEEEEE !!!!!”

“in Marvin's yard”

“Does that mean that 'Trumpy' has landed, Tilt?”

“Tilt - Is there supposed to be sound with that? It needs something! And what are you doing up so late? or so early? And speak up, man!”

“Yes, something is definitely lacking there, isn't it?

Late? Early? I dunno... I was on a vampire type schedule before, and now I'm up with the chickens! Actually, I was awake before the chickens today... I didn't want to wake them up. They can be pretty grouchy.”