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I Ate a Pound of Jerky!View Messages“I think that's the guy who tried to sue Matt Groening and Fox television several years ago. Bart Simpson was looking for a place to eat, looked at a place called 'Jerky Hut' and sais "Nah, too salty." Mr. Jerky was sure he was going to lose business because of this and tried to sue.” 1:58:59 PM 4/04/02 “Too funny, Tom. When I was a teenager, I was hungry and couldn’t find anything in the house to eat. On the top shelf of the cabinet was a box of dried prunes my mother was going to use for cooking. I scarfed that whole box. I don’t want to hear about apricots or raisins, there ain’t nothin’ like prunes! I haven’t touched another prune to this day.” 5:57:29 AM 4/05/02 “Arclite, I did the same thing with a whole box of Grape Nuts when I was in college! I felt like a snake who swallowed a large gopher.” 7:52:33 AM 4/05/02 “Oh man, I couldn't help myself and ate about 6 ozs. of turkey jerky yesterday. I was killing everyone at the gym while I was on the treadmill and went home to continue the onslaught. When I got there and my girlfriend noticed my demise, she confessed she too had eaten about 6 ozs of turkey jerky and the concert began! Open the windows, puhleeze!!” 11:55:39 AM 4/05/02 “C'mon rosey, quit being such a whimp- go for the whole pound! And make it BEEF!” 11:58:31 AM 4/05/02 “I've no beef with beef. I just like that the turkey jerky is 99% fat free! Next time, I'll eat the whole bird!” 12:03:07 PM 4/05/02 “Isn't there a Jerky Anonymous group I can join?” 12:11:43 PM 4/05/02 Hi, my name is Biz.... “I think Biz started one when she actually admitted to the group that she downed a pound. Maybe we should check for warning signs of jerkaholism; -Blackouts (or brownouts) -hiding jerky from family and friends -unusually frequent use of bathroom air fresheners -do you eat jerky alone?” 1:27:09 PM 4/05/02 “A certain percentage never leaves the lower intestines-god I hope it wasn't the kind with those firey pepper chunks- it will keep on giving,and giving and giving... Hey biz ever have baby-you might need an epidural to pass this one.” 1:38:18 PM 4/05/02 “Things, your mother never warned you about” 4:15:00 PM 4/05/02 “All this time the dudes on this site have been trying to meet Biz, and all you had to do was tempt her with jerky. Remember to take some jerky to the bar tonight, fellas.” 6:16:22 PM 4/05/02 Show me your gear and I'll show you mine “Ü I'm impressed by lots of things Dun” 6:27:08 PM 4/05/02 “Well, yesterday I drank a half gallon of apple juice in an hour. I just hope your results are different from mine.” 12:23:14 AM 4/06/02 “Delicious! Give me MORE give me MORE” 8:53:33 AM 4/06/02 **BURP****** “A lady?! How many ladies do you know that eat a pound of jerky?!?!” 8:59:31 AM 4/06/02 “Hey, you're breaking new ground here, are'nt you Biz? So glad to see you post twice on the same thread. How's the water weight these days?” 9:14:15 AM 4/06/02 what do you mean??? “nobody has ever met Biz...what's up with that?” 10:42:22 PM 4/07/02 “Uh Strider and about 4 others have (pic on Phil's web page was taken by Oldtimer in Oly Nat Park). Also, she is moving up to Oregon, so she will get to meet/hike with a bunch of Pacific Northwesterners!” 3:15:49 AM 4/08/02 “Until recently I was able to avoid contact with everyone. What is up with that? Who is Tom Terrific? Nobody has ever seen him, but I think that is a good thing.” 5:52:35 AM 4/08/02 “I have experienced the Vulcan Mind Meld with Marvin.” 3:50:27 PM 4/08/02 “mmmmm, jerky! Time for a mid-afternoon snack!” 3:53:03 PM 4/08/02 “Mind meld, Dunadan? Marvin's cry: "I come up short! There is no there there." A Vulcan weeps now Absent of all gray matter Ready for politics?” 4:03:21 PM 4/08/02 “Mind meld with Marvin I am too smart for that dude Titanium hat! Lectures from Kleetn Raindrop talking to ocean Soon to be absorbed.” 8:15:57 PM 4/08/02 Haiku is for sissies! “That is some deep #&%!$. I don't understand the significance of the Ti hat ?” 9:02:51 PM 4/08/02 “I will let my pupil, Kleetn, explain it to you.” 12:32:03 AM 4/09/02 “Biz, pull my finger.” 8:15:53 AM 4/09/02 “A pound? Is that all? Hell, my cat ate whole ham!
9:16:06 AM 4/09/02 “I guess you'll just have to take my word for it. Violin, wanna do that thing you do so well?” 9:19:50 AM 4/09/02 “Kleetn, you have just attained teacher status with that remark.” 10:01:05 AM 4/09/02 “I am most honored. What say I demonstrate some burp talking next?” 10:03:00 AM 4/09/02 “Don't make me jealous. I have never accomplished that level of discipline with my expellations.” 10:05:15 AM 4/09/02 “bacpac loves me! Oh, its Spring! Biz- Have ya ever tried pork jerky?” 10:07:44 AM 4/09/02 “Tom, please don't use "jerk" and "pork" in the same sentence.” 10:10:50 AM 4/09/02 “How 'bout some paleo-jerky? Might be a little tough, though.  Eat Barney”10:34:20 AM 4/09/02 “Aero has achieved Master status by staying inside all the lines in his coloring book.” 10:39:45 AM 4/09/02 “Dunadan- Shut up dude, maybe she'll go for it!” 10:42:03 AM 4/09/02 “Damn, Tom, you are way ahead of me! Just make sure you wrap it in a plasic bag.” 1:15:04 PM 4/09/02 “It comes with gravy!” 1:23:03 PM 4/09/02 “Eeewwww....too much information!” 1:24:27 PM 4/09/02 “OH, Bizzy, here Bizzy, Bizzy, Bizzy.” 9:34:16 AM 4/10/02 “It's no use; Bizzy's Busy!” 9:52:16 AM 4/10/02 “Very strange here, I'm afraid of this thread.” 10:21:03 AM 4/10/02 “newgirl! Welcome to the Jerky Hut!” 10:22:12 AM 4/10/02 Jerky Hut “......where its always Lady's Night!” 10:27:25 AM 4/10/02 “--------- From: Fredericks of Hollywood[SMTP:valuemail@iv-mailbck.intervolved.net] Reply To: Unsubscribe Sent: Wednesday, April 10, 2002 9:26 AM To: merkmuff@aol.com Subject: Free Panty Wardrobe from Fredericks of Hollywood Suddenly Sexy: Get 3 FREE PANTIES! A $15 Value...FREE! Get a whole new panty wardrobe from fredericks.com FREE!* Simply select your size and we'll send you 3 panties-a $15 value-FREE!* They're sexy, comfy...totally you! Get your free panty wardrobe at fredericks.com Click this link NOW! http://www.intervolved.net/i.htm?b=401000304&c=315a&i=3793882&a=10005 *Panty wardrobe is free with any order at fredericks.com. Offer valid on online orders only and only to the recipient of this e-mail. Colors and prices may vary.” 2:26:53 PM 4/10/02 Pork Jerky? “Bwa! Ever had a pulled pork sandwich... I was hangin' out with a friend of mine, and she busted out laughing when she tried to order one!” 2:31:17 PM 4/10/02 “Ugh, this is awful! Pulled Pork? I would laugh too.” 2:34:36 PM 4/10/02 “They used to have "Nut Whips" at Dairy Queen. I could never order one with a straight face!” 2:36:40 PM 4/10/02 “Hilarious! My work day is going wonderfully. I haven't laughed so much in wks.” 2:40:35 PM 4/10/02 “Nothing can prepare you for the horror that is clam jerky.  ”3:11:38 PM 4/10/02
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