Dating sucks

“Ha ha ha! Hey, she won major cool points with me last week. I took her sea kayaking in pretty choppy conditions. She was smiling the whole time. We had a pod of dolphins swim right up next to us, which won major cool points. I still don't have a good feeling about anything long term, but hey, we're both just having fun. :-)”

“Fear Drugs... nope! :-)”

“hmmmm....”

“Holding back on us are ya!

=D”

“How about me, were either of mine correct?”

“Nope, I can honestly say none of you were correct. In fact, her picture isn't even up on my work's website. She was hired to fill in temporarily, but they kept her around, so they haven't made a picture for her yet. Sounds like a crock, right? Good! :-)”

“Now all we have to do is wait for one of the Tampa stations to add a pic of their newest reported....



Mooooooooowahahahahahahahahahaaaaaaaaa”

“Scaretex,
Thanks Dewd.
I have been alone for awhile now as our relationship was in "limbo" After the last drinking episode over a year ago her parents made move back in with her mom. Which was fine with me. I stayed loyal (yes I did flirt a little in the last 6 months or so) but NEVER went beyond that. Her and I went out far and few between and did stuff. I keep hangin onto to strings, hoping it was going to get beter and the flame would rekindle itself. I felt like I was single, but knew I really was Her's if she did turn it around. I probably screwed up in someway in her mind with not being there enuf, but when she first started rehab she said it was "a selfish rehab and she would not be able to spend a lot of time together". I believe it takes two to tango, I just trying to figure out what I did wrong. I had to re-hab myself from alot of the mental trauma from her alcholism episodes. I never seen or dealt with that before in my life. I thru me for a loop. Very frustrating.
The doing more for myself is what got me interested in the whole back packing idea. Someone told how fun it is and I thought about it and said YEAH THATS SOUNDS LIKE FUN! I guess the actual finality of it (which I kinda knew was coming) is what has me writing in here now. I recover pretty well and I have been though it before (without the kids part though) I
will take it slow.
Best part is I can Fart, burp, pick my nose anytime I want now...haha
Thanks sacretex.
I may take you up on the dating tips someday.
gotta rush home now and watch the yankees and sox!!!”

“PS

Good luck DEWD with the new BABE!
Get some for me...lol”

“Cool, it sounds like you have a good head on your shoulders, Snafu. Keep your chin up (which will be a little harder to do after the Red Sox crush your Yankees). :-)”

“That chick is a total b!tch, and you are better off without her. Now I want you to read this very attentively....... Everytime you start to feel sorry for yourself, or are bummed becuase this bimbo is out of your life, think about the chump she made out of you, and what an evil nasty wench she is. Those "nice" thoughts will quickly flee away, and then you can have fun.

Good luck on the dating scene, there are some nice women out there, but the majority of them are complete whack-jobs.

Good luck, Artex and I will be the angel/devil on your shoulder.”

“Rule #2, you didn't do anything wrong, ever.”

“BTW - DHutch is one of the nice women. :)”

“Good luck on the dating scene, there are some nice women out there, but the majority of them are complete whack-jobs
Buddha Bear
04:04:27 PM
10/14/03
LMAO”

“The end of relationships is aweful, but necessary to move on in life to a better place. Be content with being single until someone really clicks with you. When I was in a similar stage, I could more clearly see what I would never live with again, and what I would never live without again. Hiking, an outdoors lifestyle, a companion on outdoor trips, and a physical lifestyle were items that I had compromised on, and never would again.

If this episode has clarified what you need to be you, then let your next partner know that these are not negotiable, and find a person who has the same lifestyle choices as you.

Bummer about the kids. Maybe the Dad is a lot more reasonable than you were led to believe. If so, the kids might be in a better place with him. You should do what is in the best interest of the kids. The court can make a better decision if it has more information. Make sure anything you do is for the kids, and not some kind of payback to the troubled ex girlfriend.

Best wishes!”

“Sorry to hear you got used and abused by this woman.

Just think, now you are available for someone much, much better.

Hang in there...”

“snafu were you dating my x? you really did the right thing cause I know she is mental:D”

“stay single! that's my motto ; )”

“I'm a firm believer in giving yourself a "breather" once you get out of a serious relationship like the one you described. It gives you time to heal and think about what you really want before you jump into another mess head first. It's not fair to you and it's certainly not fair to whomever you're seeing.

I've been single 3 years now and I am happy, content and at a very secure spot in my life. Now, I'm ready to move on..

We all have our own timetables, but give yourself some space....

Good Luck my friend, Y'all be well!

Tex”

“good advice. u go girl!”

“snafu29:

It's a shame that drinking woman is willing to drag her children through life the way she is. Children get very attached to the men that we women bring into their lives, and their hearts get broken when the men go away.

I raised a child alone and learned along the way that I had to be more protective of my child's heart than my own.

Good luck, and find yourself before you jump into another relationship. Hiking is good - you might even find someone out there that you can have a real relationship with.”

“Thanks Everyone for the support!!!
My next companion will be someone without kids. Not that I don't like the kids, it's too damn hard letting go. I will not totally rule out a woman with a children. It would have to be a close to perfect situation.
I've already been basically (75%) alone for the last 12 months. It's just now, I know I am totally (100%) alone.
The hard part is the emotions. I'm MAD, due to the whole way she did it (lying) and the situation with her drinking. I'm HAPPY, I don't have the headaches anymore. I SAD, about not getting to see the kids and also from remembering the few good times.
I'm a very strong willed person and I will persevere (sp?). Besides if I fail, and get bummed out, I will just remember what ya'll said :-)
especailly.......
The Great Buddha Bear
"Everytime you start to feel sorry for yourself, or are bummed becuase this bimbo is out of your life, think about the chump she made out of you, and what an evil nasty wench she is. Those "nice" thoughts will quickly flee away, and then you can have fun.... LOL
Thanks again :-)
Tim
PS:
As far as the kids, I think I will call the Father and let him know if the sh-t hits the fan, and the kids are in a bad situation, he can either ask me for help or even subpoena me. I'm not a vindictive person and I would not wanna be perceived that way.
See ya on a trail soon!
GO YANKEES!!!!

PSS....
Scaretex, did you get some for me...haha”

“In December I was awarded my PhD. Subject, "Marital Satisfaction."

You need to give yourself time to mourn the loss of a significant relationship before jumping into a new relationship. It takes time. On average it's 18 months. Notice I say on AVERAGE. For some people more, some people less. Some people never finish. (Hey, I'm a social scientist.)

Also, the level of anger CAN be a sign of how much you are "over it."

PS No, I am not Dr. Laura.

Best.”

“I'm the last person who should be spouting off about relationships, but this "kid" thing is really bugging me...

Don't write off women with kids completely, that's not fair...just run from the ones who think it's ok for every tom dick and harry to play daddy for however long it amuses them. If a person thinks it's ok to hurt their children like that, they are weak and selfish people anyway. Men who try to get a woman's heart thru her kids are just as bad.

Children shouldn't be brought into a relationship until it's serious, as in marriage minded.
A polite introduction between kids and the "date" is fine but more than that should take serious thought.”

“twig is right on. a single parent should NOT be in a rush for their children to meet and get buddy-buddy with the people they date. if you're dating a single parent, don't let them rush you into spending time with the kids. it's very painful for children to keep getting attached to and then losing their parent's boyfriend/girlfriend.”

“Just a point of emphasis - snafu DID say he WOULDN'T rule it out altogether. I know you guys aren't attacking snafu, not by any means.. but still thought it should be pointed out.

I think his situation is unique and understandable.”

“Not to bust you, snafu, but weren't you hot for some chick mrschili works with a couple of months ago?

You been lookin' around some too, it seems!"
bloodpusher

And this whole time I thought it was me you were after...maaaahahahah.. I am crushed. Come to Arkansas and I will find someone to get you over this fast... I promise...”

“twigeater is saying some good stuff.
The other side of that coin is a lot of women want you to get close to their kids. It's a very scary thing.”

“MrsC - suddenly, and for the first time in my life, Arkansas seems appealling ;o)”

“It's one thing to have your kids acquainted with men/women you date. It's another to involve them in an "intimate" way. Don't jump all over me, I don't mean THAT! My kids have met, had contact and conversation with many of the men I have dated. But that is it. There have been a very select few that have been allowed to actually hang out with us in a "family" type way. That takes a Very serious relationship in my opinion.

Overall kids need to see their parents, whether divorced or married. Functioning in respectful loving adult relationships. Oh, I know that will be taken wrong. But I think you know what I really mean. It's healthier than hiding every relationship.

I'll tell you what. My teenage kids have seen different aspects of dating ritual and we've discussed lots of situations. They are open with me about it as I am with them. I'm glad!”

“Come on down... We have room for alot of folks to stay. 500 acres of cotton fields. We would love to have ya for a while.”

“Come on down... We have room for alot of folks to stay. 500 acres of cotton fields. We would love to have ya for a while.”

“and that's when you should run Stomper!
LOL...”

“So, dhutch, if they thought you were dating a loser, would they pipe up and say so?”

“sorry”

“what dhutch said...that's what I meant...”

“Sometimes it takes awhile b/f you know someone. When you find out is when you need to leave, dont wait around for things to change b/c most of the time it NEVER does. Run for your life.”

“I had one woman tell me she and her kids were a 'package' deal.
I don't want to sound cheap, but she even expected me to pay for her babysitter if we went out without the kids.
I ran from that date even before it happened!

TT women are the best. Just wish a few of you lived closer to me.”

“Yup. But same as me, they have the right to say, I listen and make up my own mind. Just the same as when I voice my opinion about their dates. I have great kids.”

“You guys are just looking at the wrong type of women. You have to have a female that believes in herself and that is not full of crap. If you cant believe in yourself... then you are a nobody. Come on it makes sense! You can see through the bull#&%!$. you just have to keep your eyes open.”

“All the women I have met lately are in a bad need of an enema!”

“Wow, that's kinky...”

“to many drugs.... stay away from them, yuck!!!!!

I'm glad I dont have any of you guys problems!!”

“why does a person always feel like a loser and unwanted after a bad marriage or relationship. Do you hear the bad things that have been said to you so much you start to believe them. I know I have felt that way and it is hard to get over that feeling and get back your self esteem”

“. Do you hear the bad things that have been said to you so much you start to believe them. I know I have felt that way and it is hard to get over that feeling and get back your self esteem"
Ewker

You only hear the things that you wanna hear. Face facts and you should have no problems. Everyone has down days. If they say they dont they are full of #&%!$. You'll be back on your feet before you know it. You were trying to hook up with my friend b/f things were all down hill. No problem be happy. You have to be happy with yourself first and most important. Dont forget that!!”

“I think that is part of the growing process. Overcoming those feelings is hard and takes time, but you are stronger afterwards. Just talk them through with TTers. We stick together!

GGGGS - EEEEEEW! Package deals belong at Costco! She accepts the date she is responsible for making the babysitter arrangements. You didn't choose to have the kids!!”

“does that make any sense?”

“You were trying to hook up with my friend b/f things were all down hill.
MRSCHILI36
04:05:36 PM
10/15/03

MRSCHILI36, you have me mixed up with someone else. I think that was snafu”

“You just have to cowboy up brother. Remember, you are the man, and that 80% of women out there are about themselves or wouldn't appreciate a nice guy like you. Ya just gotta open up to the other 20% (maybe I should take my own advice).

Until then, have fun, and do stuff that YOU like. You guys are now free again, and you don't have to worry about all the BS that a woman will put you through, so enjoy.”