Dating sucks

“I'm with lizs on the paying thing, and I'm 44...

I brought up paying for BC as a counter to the whining about paying for dinners...

You forget that not only are BC pills expensive, they also pose a risk to many women...include doctor's visits in the cost of BC...do you have to visit a doctor to get a prescription for condoms??? comparing the two isn't even realistic...

I guess if I was in need of BC, I'd have to think about whether the guy was "sponge worthy" (to quote a Seinfeld episode) or not, LOL...”

“It's wrong to assume she has insurance. I for one am someone who does not. A one-month supply of BC pills cost $41. On my limited budget, sometimes that is very difficult. I choose to not get the pills for free from certain clinics because I don't wish to support/utilize them in any way because of my beliefs. (let's not open that can of worms here)

So why should a guy help pay? If he's willing to engage in the activity that necessitates the BC, he should be willing to help pay for the protection. That goes both ways.

For the record, I offer to pay on dates. I even bought the last box of condoms.”

“geez, are you guys even listening? LOL...I thought we already covered the babysitting thing! cripes!

But there ya go - women pay for BC and babysitters, men pay for dinner...sounds about equal to me...and it better be soup to nuts and drinks in a nice place, babydoll! :)”

“But...but...BC is the woman's reasonability isn't it?”

“You go, Twig!”

“LOL @ Nigal...just like certain Other things are men's responsiblity...
;)”

“But...but...BC is the woman's reasonability isn't it?"
Nigal
11:01:51 AM

LOL, if she's reasonable. ;-)”

“Wow, this thread is blowing up. When I got home from school last night my hot 40 year old neighbor started hitting on me. Hmmmm. Something to think about.”

“Ruby, fact is a woman can get BC pills for free if she needs to.

But why should a guy help pay for the pills just because your beliefs won't allow you to get them there for free.”

“Yeah, I said the name. She was flaunting her happiness waaaaaaaaay too much. This is the "Dating sucks" thread. We needed to remind her of darker days. LOL! ;-P”

“Bison - break out the toolbelt, she wants something repaired. ;-)”

“Ewker, because of my beliefs, I probably am not going to be interested in a LTR with that guy anyway. He's going to have to accept me as I am, beliefs and all. As will I of him. If we aren't compatible, then don't be sleeping with each other.

And Twig brought up the very valid point of free or not, there are health risks that are then a factor of LT usage.

I just think if a man is so cavalier about BC and expects the woman to just take care of it, then he's not worth my time. That's why it's a good thing there are so many fish in the sea.”

“"LOL @ Nigal...just like certain Other things are men's responsiblity...
;)"

Taking out the trash? LOL! Thanks for taking it as the joke it was meant as.

Were I single again at this point in my life I’d just be a-sexual and not even pursue a relationship. I would just prefer to be alone. But then again, there is something magical about hearing those five little words spoken softly by my lover,


















“Get off me I’m done.”.”

“Lol....just rember boys, paying for half the BC is better than paying for 18 years of child support. Being "cheap" is NEVER good :-P Unless you like offspring to carry on your lineage...lol!!
You don't get ANYTHING for free, kids!”

“Can you get BC pills for free? doesn't Family Planning go by income? They do give away condoms though...”

“"Bison - break out the toolbelt, she wants something repaired. ;-)"

StoveStomper
11:08:57 AM
06/17/04

And how can I expect to be compensated for my time and effort?”

“"But why should a guy help pay for the pills just because your beliefs won't allow you to get them there for free.
Ewker"

It's called RESPECT, Eddy.”

“Bison - I didn't say what needed 'maintenance'. ;-)”

“*GASP*

The horror! Geez us christ woman! Never. Ever. Ever. Mention my name in the same breath of "he whose name shall not be mentioned" aka the most pathtic piece of worthlessness ever to walk this planet who really really needs to stop stalking me.

Dang Lizs - you trying to give me a heart attack?


Just for that...dating is great...great...great!

Kissing is even better.... :p”

“Ruby,
It takes a while to learn about your dates like, dislikes, beliefs etc. usually you have slept together before you find it all out.
Unfortunately you may never find out everything about a person until it is to late.

sarbar, I agree BC is cheaper than raising a child. Like I said earlier it takes two people to do that, if it happens both are at fault then.”

“Yeah Nigal, well that comment was obviously meant to stir the pot, LOL...

And I'm not out there dating at the moment...I have a house and all my time to myself for the first time in my life, and I am thoroughly enjoying it! =D”

“Nigal, LOL

Twig, you're right about sliding scale and free condoms. I had forgotten that.”

“Well, I'm depressed and lonely now! All this talk and it made me think...






















I don't require BC nor do I like to eat out very much. I do like Corona though.”

“To answer your earlier ?, technically Yes, I should of, but couldn't do it, no guts.
Also, I thought about that post and I should not of air out my dirty luandry. sorry”

“"The horror! Geez us christ woman! Never. Ever. Ever. Mention my name in the same breath of "he whose name shall not be mentioned"

What? Were you dating Valdamort? LOL!”

“Don't feel bad Wolfie.....
I like you.
(may not make you feel better coming from a 49 yo man, but I try)
I'll buy you a beer anytime.”

“49, huh? I really am a very cheap date...and I even pay most of the time. I like it better that way...makes them feel like they "owe" me...never works but hey, maybe one day?”

“worse”

“Hey wolfie,
I need to come back up so we can go to the bar again. I still laugh at the way you introduced me at the bar.”

“"It takes a while to learn about your dates like, dislikes, beliefs etc. usually you have slept together before you find it all out."

And therein lies the problem. If you're going to do that, then stop b!tching when she/he isn't all you thought/hoped she/he was.”

“That's because it was a "special" bar...didn't want you to get hurt or scared. LOL!! Come back up anytime!”

“Yeah, Ewker...quitcher#&%!$in!”

“twiggy, I realize it is called respect. But respect works both ways also.
I just don't think a guy should have to pay for BC pills when they first start dating. if the relationship grows into something long term then that is a different story.
I also agree that long term use of BC pills is not good for the women.

ut oh, wondering if twiggy is getting mad at me by calling me by my real name :(”

“I would not have a man pay for BC, my body, my responsibility.

It would be really nice for a man to pay for babysitting if he was well-off, otherwise it is a lot to ask of a man that is already paying for the date. Your kids, your responsibility. Get the money from your exhusband who does not have to pay for babysitting fees when he goes on dates.

lizs, now here me out, and this might sound, hmmmmm.....not right to you or anyone else, but here is my thinking, and it does hold true.

There are many men out there, maybe they are the ones without scruples, that would stay with you forever if you made life easy on them by paying half all the time or most of the time. I do believe that some (a lot) of men would stay with a woman under those circumstance even if they didn't like her a lot or love her, because it's EASY!!!!! On the other hand, would a man pay for anything for a woman if he DIDN'T like her enough. SO, by a man spending a few dollars on you, it does show he likes you, and is not just killing time with you or using you as cheap way to get sex. Sometimes it is just natural for a man to take the easiest path if you let them.”

“That's too "anal". That kind of mentality leads to figuring out how to pay half of everything involved in a relationship. Movies, dinner, gas, weekend trip, etc.

It would be different if an SO said she was tight and needed some help with BC. The last SO I lived with used the shot Deproprovera (sp?). It was costly, and NOT covered by insurance, or still costly maybe. Anyway, On occasion she was tight for cash and asked me to cover it, which I did without thinking twice.

I would never ask an SO to help with condoms, although I've been lucky the vast majority of time and haven't needed them.”

“Is anyone keeping score here? I keep a little bank book when dating. Each meal the man buys is recorded and balance to what I provide.

That is unless we have a relationship based on caring, sharing, trust and respect which has been tediously built by keeping a balanced account.

WTF?”

“Living with and dating are two way diff things.”

“LMAO @ Dhutch!”

“"made life easy on them by paying half all the time or most of the time." - that's so bad it's funny.”

“bearmagnet. I think you and I just had a simultaneous posting”

“Aren't we all at the ages now where most of us are tied, snipped or produced out anyways? Too bad the teens don't discuss this like this...maybe there would be less teen pregnancy.”

“Just to clarify, I don't necessarily think BC cost should be split in half. I'm just saying that it shouldn't be automatically assumed that she is going to cover that. And that's how I feel about all the expenses involved in dating, whether it be babysitting, actual dating costs, etc. etc. Bottom line: COMMUNICATE!!!”

“bearmagnet, sonner or later your luck may run out!

Lucky for us, when our luck ran out, we were(and still are) married.

Mr. Lucky will be 14 in October.”

“Ruby, everyone b1tch's when that happens. It is not exclusive to the male or female.

Heck you can b1tch after the first date if you think it was a waste of your time.”

“I wouldn't want a man to pay for my choice of BC, I just wanted to point out that women incure a cost in dating as well. And there are people out there for whom things like that are a luxury, and child care is darned expensive.

lipstick sweetie, I'm having "braless in seattle" deja vou, LOL...

LMAO @ dhutch, hehe...”

“Dang right, wolfeyes!

But that's why they are teenagers and we ain't.”

“"lipstick sweetie, I'm having "braless in seattle" deja vou, LOL"

Why does that sound familiar, twigeater?”

“Just one other thing about the family planning thing...even if the woman qualifies to get her BC at low cost or free, she has to make an appt, have an exam, blah blah blah...
The free condoms are in a fish bowl in the counter, ya just walk in and grab some.”

“Ewker, I know. That's why I wrote he/she.”

“The condoms are locked up in CVS, I feel like an embarrassed teenager having to go ask one of the store people to open the cabinet for me.”