Here, Kitty Kitty!

“holy cow! I've got crazy mike typing syndrome”

“Actually Biz, I was referring to AllWoman as bacpac's sister.”

“That can happen!!!!

8)”

“Biz, please, my own "real" brother is bad enough...”

“nowslimmer, what the the symptoms of being allergic to Dacron?
biz

Itching in the exposed area. Before you know it you are a bloody mess. It then expands in area. This is most common.
Others take more time to explain. Later, maybe, gotta punch a clock.”

“Sounds like what kryptonite does to me.”

“to tell this story.

My wife loves cats, but is deathly allergic to them. In Fairbanks, we learned about a breed of cats that are hypoallergenic. They are Japanese Bob Tails, and were bread by Buddhist Monks to hunt rodents in the libraries of rice parchment paper. There was a lady who raised and sold them.

We bought two kittens, and they seemed pretty nice, but they just didn't grow into the family. They were very distant and acted almost like feral cats. We thought it was the breed. They started hiding in the house and wouldn't let anybody get near them.

One escaped outside in winter, surely perishing at -40F. The other finally drove me over the edge when it #&%!$ on one of my shirts hanging in the closet.

I herded it into a room and closed the door, trapping it in there. I got a towel and literally had to capture it like an African animal in that old show with Marvin and Jim (what was that called, sponsored by Wausau Ins. Co.?). After some time and several scratches, I got it and put it in a box. We took it to SPCA.

There we were told that the lady who sold it to us was being charged with animal cruelty, she lived in a mobile home with dozens of cats, that roamed at will-feral! They said the only solution was to put it down, that we were not being cruel, the lady who sold it to us was the cruel one.

The "Devil Cats" still come up in conversation sometimes, but we have had no desire to try the breed again.”

“Mutual of Omaha's Wild Kingdom.

I'll sit here safely in the chopper while Jim and Pathman wrestle with a feral pack of Devil cats.

Alaska to New Mexico? What a move!”

“New Mexico is home, my heart is in Alaska. What a bind.”

“I always wanted to go to Alaska. Ah well, I'm only 30, I have at least a little time left.”

“I constantly have to reorient myself-I am not unfortunate for having to leave Alaska, I am fortunate to having lived there for 7 years.”

“Good way to look at it. Keep it positive.”

“After all, many folks who want to never make the opprotunity.”

“As I have told several others, if you make it to Fairbanks, I have a 2+ four season tent, salmon tackle and canoe kept with a friend.”

“--EXCERPTS FROM A DOG'S DIARY

Day number 180
8:00 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
9:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!
9:40 am - OH BOY! A WALK! MY FAVORITE!
10:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!
11:30 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
12:00 noon - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!
1:00 pm - OH BOY! THE YARD! MY FAVORITE!
4:00 pm - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!
5:00 PM - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
5:30 PM - OH BOY! MOM! MY FAVORITE!


Day number 181
8:00 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
9:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!
9:40 am - OH BOY! A WALK! MY FAVORITE!
10:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!
11:30 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
12:00 noon - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!
1:00 pm - OH BOY! THE YARD! MY FAVORITE!
4:00 pm - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!
5:00 PM - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
5:30 PM - OH BOY! MOM! MY FAVORITE!


Day number 182
8:00 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
9:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!
9:40 am - OH BOY! A WALK! MY FAVORITE!
10:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!
11:30 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
12:00 noon - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!
1:00 pm - OH BOY! THE YARD! MY FAVORITE!
1:30 pm - ooooooo. bath. bummer.
4:00 pm - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!
5:00 PM - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
5:30 PM - OH BOY! MOM! MY FAVORITE!


EXCERPTS FROM A CAT'S DIARY


DAY 752 - My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little
dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to
eat dry cereal. The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape,
and the mild satisfaction I get from ruining the occasional piece of
furniture. Tomorrow I may eat another houseplant.


DAY 761 - Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around
their feet while they were walking almost succeeded, must try this at
the top of the stairs. In an attempt to disgust and repulse these
vile oppressors, I once again induced myself to vomit on their
favorite chair... must try this on their bed.


DAY 765 - Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body,
in attempt to make them aware of what I am capable of, and to try to
strike fear into their hearts. They only cooed and condescended about
what a good little cat I was...Hmmm. Not working according to plan.


DAY 768 - I am finally aware of how sadistic they are. For no good
reason I was chosen for the water torture. This time however it
included a burning foamy chemical called "shampoo." What sick minds
could invent such a liquid. My only consolation is the piece of thumb
still stuck between my teeth.


DAY 771 - There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices. I
was placed in solitary throughout the event. However, I could
hear the noise and smell the foul odour of the glass tubes they call
"beer.."
More importantly I overheard that my confinement was due to MY power
of "allergies." Must learn what this is and how to use it


DAY 774 - I am convinced the other captives are flunkies and maybe
snitches. The dog is routinely released and seems more than happy to
return. He is obviously a half-wit. The bird on the other hand has
got to be an informant, and speaks with them regularly. I am certain
he reports my every move. Due to his current placement in the metal
room his safety is assured. But I can wait, it is only a matter of time...
=^..^=”