Thing's I'm doing at work since it's slo w

“newgurl, get a bunch of toothpicks, and start making a miniture lumber yard. once you finish...set it on fire, when your co-workers see you..give them a goofy grin and say...OOPS”

“That is a very strange suggestion Opie.”

“*big stoopid grin*

THANKS!!!!”

“Strange suggestion, but sinister and genius at the same time.”

“The end of last week and the beginning of this week was pretty slow for me too. This is what I do:
1. Pretend to self teach CADKEY98(already know most of it)
2. Pretend to take care of stupid PDRF's(Product decrepency report form) submitted by peons from the production form(probably been submitted before and either taken care of or has no bearing whatsoever with what they are asking for)
3. Talk to co-workers about things needed to be done around the house, but would rather go camping,hiking, or something to avoid the real issue.
4. Stare longing out the window wishing was someplace else(have to get up from cubicle to do this)
5. Walk down to production floor pretending to take care of business
6. Go to the bathroom
7. etc, etc”

“Oh yeah, very. Is it against the law for me to drink on Thurs. night. I have to go to a home decorating party at my Grandma's tomorrow night and I'm having a sleep over w/ my . . . . sisters (lame) on Sat. night. I've really had the itch to party.”

“newgie got in trouble, newgie got in trouble.....”

“against the law?...it was the law that you had to drink on thursday when i lived in tuscaloosa. I accidently end up in bars here on thursdays and wonder why they are empty”

“<ahem>

with the radio, that is.....”

“Thanks for offering help. I got a start date. I live in Montreal. Travel is going to be the most expensive part of this trip. Now, I just have to get there.”

“Why hasn't anyone mentioned bean flicking or pudd pulling?”

“The walls in my office are too thin for that!”

“Tarpy must be looking at pictures of motorcycles!”

“Today I'm going to eat as much as I can while at work. It will quite the challenge. I'm competeing w/ the boss's son. He is gigantic. This is sort of a David and Goliath challenge. Who wants to bet on me?”

“Are you one of those skinny people with a hollow leg where the food goes? If so, I'll take you...”

“Take him down to Pug's and see if he can finish one of those omlettes. That kicked my butt last Sunday!”

“Two words: Cubicle Fishing.


If you have a draw-string badge holder, you too can cubicle fish with ordinary office supplies. I've also had good luck with hard candies.”

“Yes, Bit, unfortunately I am. Aero, those things were huge. They were good though. I think I ate about 3/4's of mine. We're going to order steaks from the local steakhouse for lunch. I'm going to kick his ace!!!”

“I'm trying to think of a food analog to being hit in the head with a rock from a sling. A lot of dried fruit maybe? Salt it down so he has to drink a lot of water too. That might help.”

“I had a friend like that in a band I was in once. He was as big around as a toothpick, but ate like a horse.

We were changing for a concert once, and I noticed he had this huge scar on his belly, so I asked him about it. He told me he had had some sort of intestinal surgery when he was a baby, and it all came into focus. He was probably missing a few feet of small intestine, so he wasn't extracting all the calories from the food he ate.

Lucky b@stard.”

“Not sure how lucky it is Bit. I find it rather embarassing a great deal of the time. Not how much I can eat, how much I can't seem to gain. Okay, now back to business. I think I can beat him. He's hung over. He may end up vomiting.”

“I need to figure out some Friday afternoon cubicle events, too. We tried to see how many people we could cram in, but had to quit after two. I did manage to find the "Manufactured By Prison Industries" tag, though.”

“Hee Hee! I think you've got him newgirl, if he's hung over! Make sure the steaks are rare and the fries are greasy!”

“I wish we could drink on the job. It's just a sawmill. If I started now, I could be sober in time for Grandma' stupid home decorating party at 6 tonight.”

“Oh yeah! Alcohol and sawmills; a great combination! Post some pics will ya?”

“I'm not responsible for doing the actual tree destruction. It would be completely safe in the office.”

“Like it was safe for you to be on the radio yesterday?

j/k.....lol”

“Yeah, the same way. I totally almost got my radio taken away. The guys were getting pretty annoyed.”

“I guess I wasn't humoring them.”

“radios, alcohol, and newgie....JUST SAY NO!”

“We're starting w/ Oreas. He will be definitely lose.”

“Make him eat a raw onion, then smoke a cigar.

That'll do it....”

“yuck. that's punishment for me.”

“Okay, I have to get offline. I need to get going on the competition. Steaks are here.”

“raw onions and cigars? can I join ya? sounds great... got any good red onions?”

“Man I am so jealous! Newgirl's having steaks for lunch and I'm sittin' here with a soggy PB&J. ( Even if she's eating with a fat, sweaty guy with a hangover!)”

“Okay, I didn't win, but I came close. The texas toast was a step over the line. That guy can pack it in. He's 19 and an absolute giant. I made a big effort though.”

“Hang on, he's 19 and hung over? Isn't that against the law?

Call the Transportation Dept.! Revoke Montana's highway money!”

“Give him a break- it was high school graduation last night!”

“He's on the Slack and Field team at U of M Aero. He's home for the summer and workin' for dear 'ol dad (the boss).

Bit, this is rural MT. The drinking age means little if you can show you are man (or woman) enough to handle it.”

“lol, I know newgie, I was just being ironic.”

“Is it Derin? Small state!”

“I got board at work today, so I went golfing! Yeeeeeeeehaw!”

“I golfed yesterday afternoon and am lying about my score today at work!”

“Yeeeeees! How did you Aero? He's huge, eh?!”

“I'm palying the game "Six Degrees from Aero to Newgirl" today.

1)I'm friends with Jennifer
2)Jennifer's brother is Matt
3)Matt is Derin's teammate
4)Derin works with newgirl!
coo,l huh?”

“Yeah, that is cool. He's an impressive kid. Have you watched him in competition?”

“Ithink I saw him when he was in HS down at the Metra track”

“Yep, probably. He is extremely strong. A real help at the mill.”

“Shoot – it’s Montana. I’m just surprised you’re not related.”