What if you gave a birthday party....

“And not just a birthday party, but a hike in combination with his birthday which was not a secret, and which had been announced - repeatedly - in my original invitation to the hike, and my continuing e-mails over the last nine months to people from Trail Talk who had signed up for this gathering.

My llama hikes may have become old hat and less exotic than the latest group grope in Montana, but people who signed up to attend this combination family car camp/ fishing trip/ birthday party for Phil (starting back last September) saw fit to not even respond to my E-mails as late as the day of the trip to let me know they weren't coming.
How considerate.

The last person to bail dropped out the actual day of what had been scheduled to be a dutch oven cookout (prepared by Phil), and the start of the car camp into which I had invested so many hours of planning.

I planned because I had been asked to by the people who signed up for the trip.
Last fall I put together a series of maps, "daily events" and detailed information, and e-mailed them - repeatedly - to folks who kept losing them and who kept asking me to send them again.

I was looking forward to hosting a car camp and birthday party for Phil.

We still had a birthday party.

Phil, his son David, his daughter Debbie, and I, had a little dutch oven dinner which Phil cooked, and a small carrot cake with candles that I brought along.
John, my Husband Person, arrived just after we sang Happy Birthday and gave Phil his present.

I am disappointed (but not terribly surprised) to find that all the people at TT whom Phil helps with his advice, and the unselfish hard work he puts into his Trail Talk Photo Page - those people who signed up to be part of the 2002 family car camp/ fishing hike (25 of them to begin with), and birthday party - can be so thoughtless.

Phil was generous enough to only say (but not meanly- he's too nice a guy) that he hoped it rained in Montana this week. We suspected that Montana ended up being a bigger draw than him.
I am quite sure that some of our last minute, and last second, no-shows went to Montana instead and just found it too much trouble to let me know they weren't coming here.

Phil - sorry to be publically ragging about this - but I don't think what people did was very nice.”

“my feelings would be hurt too.”

“I feel for you Mel. Its not nice being let down like that. In my experience, some people don't feel cyber RSVP's hold much importance.”

“Sorry to hear that Mel,... Phil`s a great guy and a darn fine cook the way I hear it and good company all around.”

“mel, I really try to keep up with stuff and I even missed this. :-0 Gee, I really need some frequent flyer miles.

Peace!
Pamster SLE”

“umm did I miss a thread on this somehow? How come I wasnt invited? Was it the nude pic of me and a goat?

Happy birthday phil and sorry to hear about your absent guests. I agree with mel very much. It was just plain rude of them. Its a good thing your a lot nicer then me cause Id be busy reworking their pictures with photoshop.”

“That sucks. From what I've read about Phil, he seems like a great guy.”

“a little courtesy goes a long way. this sort of thing isn't a rarity on ect's. you figure out who will show when they say they will and who will more than likely be a no-show. although the no-shows are usually considerate enough to let you know before hand. to ditch one trip for another and not even tell the person planning it you won't show is piss poor in my book.

mel, how about you post a list of their names so we can publicly abuse them with scorn and disdain.

happy belated birthday to you phil!”

“Phil and Mel, sorry about the trip. How terribly heartless and thoughtless of those TT'rs. It's easier said than done but just blow it off. Their are people here that care about you and appreciate your presence here. :)”

“HAPPY BIRTHDAY, PHIL!

I'm sure that a lot of those people who signed up last year now have amnesia, but I'm sorry for the hurt it caused Mel and Phil. I really appreciate Phil's website, and hope that the dutch oven dinner was fun regardless.”

“Ouch, from me too.

I, also, was entirely unaware of that event, and would not have been able to attend anyway. And although "some" attrition is standard fare for all of these trips, I do share your agitation and sadness that so many pulled out so late, and some without any notice at all.

Mel, THANK YOU for all the work you put into planning that event.

And Phil, THANK YOU for being one of the real class acts here on TT, and for all that you have done over the years to make this a friendly and worthwhile place to hang out.

Oh, and...a sincere, although belated, "happy birthday." :)”

“Can we agree to put forth the (1 or 2 minutes of) effort to cancel when we're not going to make a hike? So that people aren't left hanging around waiting and wondering? So that people can change/make plans accordingly.

Mel, you were way to nice on this one.”

“Happy Birthday Phil!

Forget Those Slackers! I would've loved to have been there, but according to Mapquest,com it's a 39-hour drive...


1: Start out going West on WRIGHTSBORO RD. 3.87 miles

2: Take the GA-415 W/I-520 N ramp. 0.19 miles

3: Merge onto BOBBY JONES EXWY. 1.75 miles

4: Take the I-20 W exit- exit number 1A- towards ATLANTA. 0.23 miles

5: Merge onto I-20 W. 280.80 miles

6: Take the I-20 W/I-59 S exit on the left towards TUSCALOOSA. 0.45 miles

7: Merge onto I-20 W. 610.37 miles

8: Take the exit- exit number 499A- towards US-80 W/DALLAS. 0.50 miles

9: Merge onto TX-557 SPUR W. 3.74 miles

10: TX-557 SPUR W becomes US-80 W. 19.02 miles

11: Take I-30 W. 53.96 miles

12: I-30 W becomes I-20 W. 420.74 miles

13: I-20 W becomes I-10 W. 891.57 miles

14: Take the CA-60 exit on the left towards RIVERSIDE. 0.33 miles

15: Merge onto CA-60 W. 22.65 miles

16: Take the CA-91/I-215 N exit towards RIVERSIDE/BEACH CITIES/SAN BERNARDINO/BARSTOW. 0.14 miles

17: Keep LEFT at the fork in the ramp. 0.22 miles

18: Keep RIGHT at the fork in the ramp. 0.23 miles

19: Merge onto CA-91 W. 36.82 miles

20: Take the LEMON ST exit towards ANAHEIM BLVD/HARBOR BLVD. 0.27 miles

21: Turn LEFT onto N LEMON ST. 0.50 miles

22: Turn LEFT onto W LA PALMA AVE. 0.11 miles

23: Turn RIGHT onto N ANAHEIM BLVD. 0.86 miles

Total Estimated Time: Total Distance:
39 hours, 21 minutes 2349.30 miles”

“Tilt, you just proved the point...some people will use ANY excuse to bail out on their commitments...”

“39 hrs.? i could drive that in my sleep. you're on 20 the whole time. ever hear of auto pilot? jk
nothing like driving diagonally across the country, huh?”

“Yeah... well somebody still owes me a trip to Disneyland! The rest of the family went on a trip there back in the 60s, but I had to stay home because I got the mumps.

Disneyworld just isn't the same.”

“Happy Birthday Phil !!

The first I heard of it was when I saw your post, on the the Montanapalooza thread. And we did indeed drink a toast, with cake and everything, on Tuesday night.

I hope you enjoyed your day, and have many more to come......

Best Regards... Hodgeman”

“Mel is very kind, but in my humble opinion my birthday wasn't the issue. To me the much bigger issue was the failure of many people who initially planned to participate to be non-responsive to Mel's follow-up email messages or to just "no-show" without any communication.

Hopefully in the future people will be more considerate to whoever is planning a trip. Things change and sometimes cancelations are unavoidable, but a simple phone call, email or post directed to the right person makes things easier to handle. It takes a lot of time to plan an outing properly and the least we can do is be as current as we can about our status with those doing the work.

I wished I could have been two places at once last week. But thoroughly enjoyed camping with my family and Mel's family.

Peace to everyone and I look forward to meeting more TT people in the future.”

“Happy Birthday Phil. Sorry I could not attend. Your feast at the last llama hike was my first dutch oven dinner. Thanks for that.

To do what I say I'm gonna do,when I say I'm gonna do it, is a principal I live by. Not everyone sees it as I do. Thus the "Solo Hike" was created.

Many more to you Phil.

Good on ya Mel.”

“Well - Phil's post above shows why he is TT's favorite and Montana is virtually uninhabited.

Happy Birthday Phil.”

“Mel, I have the feeling that you think Montanpalooza was part of the problem for the lack of turn-out at Phil's party. As Hodgeman pointed out, OM baked a cake, we had a toast in his honor and sang happy birthday to him. I don't know Phil, but can tell by his posts that he's a kind and considerate person.

Happy Birthday, Phil. Looking forward to meeting you in the future.”

“Yeah, happy day Phil. Getting older isn't fun, but it beats the heck out of the alternative.”

“I was bummed to see this. Phil seems like a genuine class act and there seems to be something really excellent about the friendship between Phil and Mel.

I'm so glad you had a good time.

Phil (Mel too) if you ever need a break from being at the far left of this country... I hope you'll come up to see me on the right. I'd be glad to take y'all out to the old worn down mountains we've got 'round here.”

“A really be-lated happy birthday to you Phil.

Sorry that those TT'ers didn't show, and were inconsiderate to both you and Mel.”

“Phil is the man! Happy B-Day brother. I'm not gonna rag on those who didn't show, however. We are like a family here. Forgive, forget.”