Speaking of banning ...

“Traficant got eight years! No bail!”

“Does he get to keep the toupe' while in the slammer?”

“He says it's double jeopardy because the House already voted to expel him! LOL!”

“this child is so ridiculous it's pitiful.”

“LOL Artex, I think they'll just burn it! At least I hope they do.

Wotta idiot! He's obviously delusional.”

“should have heard him on Imus yesterday. Youch! bleeped and bleeped and cut off finally.”

“I'm going to miss him. At least he's entertaining. Better than trying to listen to Lieberman (barf!)”

“The toupe is finally free!

Last I heard, there was no parole in the federal system anymore. It sounds like they took pity on him... that RICO Statute is tough tough tough.”

“Whack!!!!”

“I imagine his golf game should improve during the stay at the country club.”

“You thinking Eglin maybe, chili?”

“Volleyball!

He's going to Camp Happyland to play volleyball!”

“Eglin? You've got to be kidding. Is he going to waterski and go to the beach while in jail, too?”

“Nah, he'll be doing greenskeeping on the base golf course...personally I think he should go to Marion, but I'm probably in the minority there...”

“heh, heh. He'd better watch out for snakes on that course. One snake meets another....”

“No problem with snakes. Professional courtesy.”

“Eglin is the prison for ex-governmental officials.”

“Most prisons are overcrowded and serve terrible food. Not Eglin, the prison that takes you back to summer camp.

Beneath the sunny skies of the Florida Panhandle lie 28 lush acres boasting green lawns, palm trees, walking paths, and a picturesque bay—the kind of idyllic spot that most people dream about retiring to. The athletic facilities include a covered weightroom, a softball field, and racquetball and tennis courts. There are wide-screen TVs, a cafeteria that offers a choice of entrées, and, for the calorie-conscious, a salad bar.

Welcome to Eglin Federal Prison Camp, the Shangri-la of our nation’s correctional institutions.

Opened in 1962, the camp caters to more than 800 white-collar criminals who show little propensity for violence or flight. Their rap sheets list crimes like tax fraud and financial conspiracy—offenses that would scream, “Make me your wife!” in a high-security lockup. Among Eglin’s more notable guests have been a part-owner of the Tampa Bay Devil Rays, a former governor of Maryland, Watergate conspirator E. Howard Hunt, and fashion magnate Aldo Gucci (who worked in the camp’s tailor shop).

Yeah, they call it a prison camp, but the typical Eglin con cleans and does yard work on the adjacent air force base. When he’s not working, he lives in his own semiprivate cubicle with a bed, desk, and locker. Inmates are free to move around the compound; there are no iron bars, no armed guards, no fences. In fact, last year a guy “escaped” simply by hopping into a government truck and driving away.


Not surprisingly, there’s a long waiting list of inmates at other institutions hoping to transfer to Eglin. In fact, if you haven’t yet planned for retirement, you might consider embezzling a few grand when you turn 60. By then our tax dollars may have paid for a new golf course. —Charles Coxe


Maxim Online article”

“Seems like I remember that's where Charlie Hustle (Pete Rose) did his time...”

“Now there's a retirement plan!”

“That's where they sent John Mitchell and a few of the other Watergate co-conspirators.”

“I learned to swing a club on the range (golf, not bombing) there.”

“In denying bail, (Judge) Wells cited earlier comments from Traficant that he planned to break out of jail and "tear the throats out of law enforcement officers." She also said Traficant had already violated court orders by leaving the state of Ohio on one occasion.”

“lol...looks like at least a medium-security prison for him then...”

“I say send him to Rahway!”

“At Elgin they probably get to visit the Matador Room at night!”

“Stark for him! (FL prison where Bundy was put to death)

And he better keep that toop he DOESN'T want to look pretty for the BUBBAS!!!”

“lol -tango!Yo.”

“Well, they better not send him to Texas, because we put everyone to death down here...only after spending HUGE amounts of tax dollars first to make it look good.

Makes me sick!

Tex”

“They can't put him to death. What would the nation do for laughs?”

“Ah yes Club Fed, where all who break federal laws go to pay for their crimes. It'll be hard to serve his next term from there. BOL!”

“He's gotta get elected first. He was kicked out of Congress (a difficult feat for most, but a cinch for him). His district was cut up in redistricting, so he has to run in a new district. He has to run as an independent. And he's been convicted and sent to the hoosgow, so it's not likely he'll garner a lot of votes.”

“Exactly and I think the guy is terminally moronic for thinking that it will ever happen. The fact that he is counting on it is just icing on the cake. ROTFLMAO!!!”

“You never know with those Ohio Types... <G>”

“Stranger things have happened. They elected a dead man in Missouri.”

“Sounds like he had to remove his toupe when he was booked into the Akron jail, but they will let him keep it in his cell.

Why would anybody buy something that looks that bad?”

“Some shyster rug merchant talked him into it?”

“He's emotionally invested in the idea that it's attractive. If he takes it off now, then it's an admission that he knew he looked like an ass all those years he wore it.”

“Looked like an a$$, behaved like an a$$. I guess he should leave it on!”

“You left out 'brayed like an ass'. Can a convicted felon run for public office?”

“He'll have to lose the rug when he's transferred tp a fed facility. It looks like a rug to me. People didn't notice this?”

“FG, I'm not sure whether he could run or not, but he certainly would never be seated because a: he's attending Camp Happy Land and b: he was kicked out of Congress.

I'm also not certain whether the charges of which he was convicted are felonies or misdemeanors, although I suspect felonies.

It just doesn't matter to him because he doesn't get it. He really should be in Camp Ga-Ga Land!”

“go to phucking hell”