Sally Struthers Needs Your Help in This Time of Ne

“Smiley Girl sent this to me, and it really touched me.

Subject: SUPPORT - A - PLAYER
Since September 11, 2001, Americans have come together as never before
in our generation. We have banded together to overcome tremendous
adversity. We have weathered direct attacks on our own soil, wars
overseas, corporate scandal, layoffs, unemployment, stock price plunges,
droughts, fires, and a myriad of economic and physical disasters both
great and small. But now, we must come together once again to overcome
our greatest challenge yet.

Hundreds of Major League Baseball players in our very own nation are
living at, just below, or in most cases far above the seven-figure
salary level. And as if that weren't bad enough they could be deprived
of their life-giving pay for several months, possibly longer, as a
result of the upcoming strike situation. But you can help!

For only $20,835 a month, about $694.50 a day (that's less than the cost
of a large screen projection TV) you can help a MLB player remain
economically vi! able during his time of need. This contribution by no
means solves the problem as it barely covers the annual minimum salary,
but it's a start, and every little bit will help!

Although $700 may not seem like a lot of money to you, to a baseball
player it could mean the difference between spending the strike golfing
in Florida or on a Mediterranean cruise. For you, seven hundred dollars
is nothing more than a month's rent, half a mortgage payment, two
unemployment checks, or a month of medical insurance with COBRA, but to
a baseball player, $700 will partially replace his daily salary.

Your commitment of less than $700 a day will enable a player to buy that
home entertainment center, trade in the year-old Lexus for a new
Ferrari, or enjoy a weekend in Rio.

HOW WILL I KNOW I'M HELPING?

Each month, you will receive a complete financial report on the player
you sponsor. Detailed information about his stocks, bonds, 401(k), real
estate, and other investment holdings will be mailed to your home. Plus,
upon signing up for this program, you will receive an unsigned photo of
the player lounging during the strike on a beach somewhere in the
Caribbean (for a signed photo, please include an additional $150). Put
the photo on your refrigerator to remind you of other peoples'
suffering.

HOW WILL HE KNOW I'M HELPING?

Your MLB player will be told that he has a SPECIAL FRIEND who just wants
to help in a time of need. Although the player won't know your name, he
will be able to make collect calls to your home via a special operator
in case additional funds are needed for unforeseen expenses.

YES, I WANT TO HELP!

I would like to sponsor a striking MLB player. My preference is checked
below:

[ ] Infielder [ ] Outfielder [ ] Starting Pitcher [ ] Ace
Pitcher
[ ] Entire team (Please call our 900 number to ask for the cost of a
specific team - $10 per minute)

[ ] Alex Rodriguez (Higher cost: $60,000 per day)

Please charge the account listed below $694.50 per day for the player
for the duration of the strike. Please send me a picture of the player I
have sponsored, along with an Alex Rodriguez 2001 Income Statement and
my very own Donald Fehr MLB Players Union pin to wear proudly on my hat
(include $80 for hat).

Your Name: _______________________

Telephone Number: ____________________

Account Number: _____________________

Exp.Date:_______

[ ] MasterCard [ ] Visa [ ] American Express [ ] Discover

Signature: _______________________

Alternate card (when the primary card exceeds its credit limit):

Account Number: _____________________Exp.Date:_______

[ ] MasterCard [ ] Visa [ ] American Express [ ] Discover

Signature: _______________________

Mail completed form to MLB Players Union or call 1-900-*** -FANS now to
enroll by phone ($10 per minute).

Disclaimer: ! Sponsors are not permitted to contact the player they have
sponsored, either in person or by other means including, but not limited
to, telephone calls, letters, e-mail, or third parties. Contributions
are not tax-deductible”

“uhhhh, maybe I should read the other posts before posting stuff!”

“Ding-ding-ding-ding-ding...!!!!!”

“Hey, that other thread didn't say a Thing about Sally Struthers!

(who, BTW, deserves a Special Retrotoactive HMHW Club Award for her performance in The Getaway)”

“Retrotoactive?

Sorry, I was a little bit distratacted, LOL”

“Maybe I should read other posts before sending stupid e-mails...where the h*ll is it posted?”

“Support MLB

PS... the deadline is 3 pm today.

(eastern time?)”

“Holy shinola; I see everything twice!”

“Give the tequila a rest! LOL”

“I heard if you swallow the worm from the bottom of a bottle of Mezcal, you'll have visions...

Of course, it could just be from drinking that much mezcal.....”

“Squirrels might start talking back to ya...”

“i just spent all my cash adopting a failing golf pro. dammit. this is a much better cause.

i still liked the professional gladitorial arena idea.”

“Sally Struthers was "hot" in the 70's like most things they loose there appeal at time goes on! Are those kids she is helping OK now ?????”

“I think she's been keeping a fairly low profile lately. Has anyone seen ads for her doing dinner theatre?”

“I was hoping for the strike.

I don't like baseball.”

“Don't watch baseball!

HOCKEY ALL THE WAY!!!!!

8)”

“You are right on the money CMB! Hockey is the sport of GODS!! A little over a month till the first game!!!!”

“Hockey is exciting, fast and enjoyable...baseball is....err...the opposite. Flame on.”