Fecal Surprise

“Hanover man sentenced for foul act

He voided in ex-girlfriend's home

By ERIN NEGLEY
For Dispatch/Sunday News


A bizarre Fourth of July criminal act cost Allan E. Cheese $2,300 and left his ex-girlfriend disgusted.

Two weeks after Cheese, 29, of 539 S. Franklin St., Hanover, and Gale Lee Baum, 28, of New Oxford, broke up, he called her and asked to talk, Eastern Adams Regional Police Patrolman David M. Ogle said.

Baum's ex-husband, Eldon Leon Baum Jr., 34, of Virginia, was visiting her, and she asked Cheese not to come over. When the Baums returned from their breakfast at the Keystone Diner, they found a disgusting surprise, Ogle said.

Cheese had defecated on Baum's mattress, replaced the sheets and hid the fecal matter around the house including in the pocket and sleeve of Eldon Baum's leather riding jacket, inside his backpack and on clothes left at the residence. Cheese also dipped two bottles of Eldon Baum's cologne in the toilet and soiled Gale Baum's teddy bear, Ogle said.

The evidence pointed to Cheese, who left two notes at the scene, Ogle said. One read, "Here's a little something for me to remind you of what I think of you and what you are. Eat it and die."

Ogle used an "I miss you" note Cheese sent to Gale Baum to compare the handwriting.

Gale Baum called the police and got a protection from abuse order against Cheese after the incident.

Ogle soon contacted Cheese, who admitted his guilt. When Ogle started reading Cheese his rights, Cheese stopped talking.

"He said, 'I could get in trouble for this?'" Ogle said.

Cheese pleaded guilty Tuesday to three charges of criminal mischief and one charge of harassment. District Justice John C. Zepp III ordered Cheese to pay an $800 fine and $1,605 in restitution to the Baums and apartment owner Carl Scozzaro to replace the soiled items.

"I still feel victimized," Gale Baum said after the hearing. "I've been sleeping on the floor since this happened." She is moving and wants to "start over new."

Cheese declined comment.

source”

“ROTFLMAO!! anyone named "Cheese" is just destined for trouble. and he got it in the pack, too!”

“"Cheese had defecated on Baum's mattress, ... inside his backpack..."

I think I better have a little talk with Allan Cheese.”

“Next time use Cheese Whiz!

(the Aerosol kind!)”

“Oh boy! This is my kind of thread! I'm sure the coincidence was not lost on Violin.
"No, not the backpack!"”

“Actaully, I thought this thread was going to be about a new backcountry recipe!”

“Ugh!

"I could get in trouble for this?" ROTF!!”

“For a long time I've thought the phrase should be "Eat this and LIVE!" Wouldn't THAT be worse?”

“So, I suppose Baum was a bit cheesed-off seeing that Cheese dropped a bomb or two.

Ogle must've gotten an eye-full too.”

“Hmmmmmm...”

“Yeah gojo, hard to believe, huh?

Soiled the teddy bear, too. Has he no shame?”

“They had a 'Revenge' segment on the radio this morning.

Two hight school sweethearts went off to college. This gal got tired of the relationship and suggested he see other people. The guy persisted and would not take no for an answer. She continuted to refuse his advances. After several weeks the girl sent the guy a photo of her blowing someone else with the message, get lost.

The guy sent the picture to her parents with a note that said, "I'm starving, Please send money for food."”

“Man, bacpac, that's as old as the hills.

You should get out more often.”

“you should ALL get out more often!”

“i'm gonna go out and poop!”

“Tom Terrific - LOL!”

“WAY COOL!!!!!

8)”