another bear attack..

“the other night, while masterbating in the shower(shup, you all do it too) a grizzly attacked me. i quickly grabed the shampoo to squirt it in his eyes and disorient him, but i forgot it was my kid's johnson's baby snampoo. he was slashin away at me when i grabbed my wifes lady bic razor & quickly shaved him before he knew what was happening. he ran away ashamed of being a bare bear. man, i was so lucky, WHEW!”

“Yeah, I hate it when that happens. Dam shower bears!”

“Some people just go blind and/or get hair on their knuckles. You get a visit from a Grizzly Bear...we're jealous.”

“gillette makes a good knuckle-hair remover cream now. check it out.”

“you mean you didnt stuff or mount that bear dewd? I would have!”

“i had no real interest in mounting him, he was too late for that.....and my wife forgot to pick up more stove-top stuffin last week at the store. besides he high-tailed outta here....mumbling something about the hair club for bears.”

“If ya leave the window open sometimes a passing beaver will slip in but remember to check the age of any shaved beaver before mounting. :}”

“This may be the single dumbest thing I've ever heard of.

Don't you know that by masturbating in the shower you are leading the underground cannibals right to your door?

May fate have mercy on our species.”

“Odd, the bears visiting my bathroom only drink out of the toilet and eat those little rose shaped soaps....and last year, late in the fall, one of 'em use the scale!”

“I usually have to stash the soap in the toilet tank to keep the bears out of it.”

“where should i do it then?



great tip WD!



lmao DOM, if there's grass on da field, it's time to play ball.”

“LMFAO!!!!!!!

Thats too funny!

That is something that you would find in a freak show or something!!!!

8p”

“but i can't come up with anything except:
leave it to you, strat.

ps. better watch out what you say. just yesterday i was saying how my boots are so supportive they won't let me tweak an ankle. now, im sitting in my computer chair with my ankle wrapped in ice up on the dining room table, after walking down Big Hump Mountain with a broken(i think) ankle.”

“bummah dood. hope it aint broken for real. that would make it really hard to fight off a bear in your shower.”

“leki to the eye and that bear won't be botherin me anymore.”

“LOL!”