HMWHC News

“Boys & Lizs, it's time we get involved in politics with elections just a month away. I've done much research, and found that the judge in the following article has the exact platform we are looking to support.



Judge vows to testify in his misconduct case

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Associated Press

BENTON, Ky. -- Marshall District Judge Don Thomas says he will take the stand in his own defense today and fight allegations of judicial misconduct that will be heard this week in Paducah.

''I feel that it's very important that the truth come out,'' Thomas said. There will be about 45 witnesses, including some who have recanted earlier statements, ready to testify on his behalf, he said.

Thomas is the first judge in Western Kentucky to have a misconduct case aired publicly before the Judicial Conduct Commission.

Seven charges were filed in October against Thomas, including allegations that he used his office to help a woman with whom he was having ''a personal relationship,'' and that he asked exotic dancers who appeared in his court to give him ''a private show.'' Thomas has denied all the allegations.

''This hearing is important for me and for the people of Marshall County who elected me district judge,'' Thomas said, adding that he plans to seek a second term next year.

The hearing will begin at 9 a.m. CST at the federal courthouse in Paducah.

Three days have been set aside for the hearing, but it could take longer, said Jim Lawson, executive director of the commission.

If Thomas is found guilty, punishment could range from a private reprimand to removal from office. The former Marshall County attorney has been a judge since 1997. He has been allowed to continue his duties.


We need to recruit candidates like Judge Thomas. Let's put the HMWH stamp on America!”

“That is what we need. More strippers in the legal system!”

“...could add a whole new meaning to 'stripsearch'...”

“Thought I would pass this along in case anyone was interested in continuing education:

TWO YEAR DEGREE
A new two-year degree is being offered at the University that many of you
should be interested in: Becoming a Real Man. That's right, in just six
mini-semesters, you, too, can be a real man as well as earn a MA degree
(Male Arts). Please take a moment to look over the program outline.

FIRST YEAR
Autumn Schedule:
MEN 101: Combating Stupidity
MEN 102: You, Too, Can Do Housework
MEN 103: PMS-Learn When to Keep Your Mouth Shut
MEN 104: We Do Not Want Sleazy Under things for Christmas

Winter Schedule:
MEN 110: Wonderful Laundry Techniques
MEN 111: Understanding the Female Response to Getting in at > 4am
MEN 112: Parenting: It Doesn't End with Conception
EAT 100: Get a Life, Learn to Cook
EAT 101: Get a Life, Learn to Cook II
ECON 001A: What's Hers is Hers

Spring Schedule:
MEN 120: How NOT to Act Like a Butt face When You're Wrong
MEN 121: Understanding Your Incompetence
MEN 122: YOU, the Weaker Sex
MEN 123: Reasons to Give Flowers
ECON 001C: What Was Yours is Hers

SECOND YEAR
Autumn Schedule:
SEX 101: You CAN Fall Asleep without It
SEX 102: Morning Dilemma: If It's Awake, Take a Shower
SEX 103: How to Stay Awake After Sex
MEN 201: How to Put the Toilet Seat Down

Winter Schedule:
MEN 210: The Remote Control: Overcoming Your Dependency
MEN 211: How to Not Act Younger than Your Children
MEN 212: You, Too, Can Be a Designated Driver
MEN 213: Honest, You Don't Look Like Tom Cruise
MEN 230A: Her Birthdays and Anniversaries Are Important

Spring Schedule:
MEN 220: Omitting %&*! from Your Vocabulary (Pass/Fail Only)
MEN 221: Fluffing the Blanket After Farting Is Not Necessary
MEN 222: Real Men Ask for Directions
MEN 223: Thirty Minutes of Begging is NOT Considered Foreplay
MEN 230B: Her Birthdays and Anniversaries Are Important 2

Course Electives:
EAT 101: Cooking with Tofu
EAT 102: Utilization of Eating Utensils
EAT 103: Burping and Belching Discreetly
MEN 231: Mothers-in-law
MEN 232: Appear to Be Listening
MEN 233: Just Say "Yes, Dear"
ECON 001C: Cheaper to Keep Her”

“parenting, it doesn't end at conception.
i like it.”

“Now that is cool!

Where do I sign up?

8)”

“Now THAT'S funny stuff!!!!

LOL @ Phil!”

“LOL at last!”

“How come the curriculum for ‘Becoming a Real Man’ is exactly the like the curriculum for ‘Becoming Totally Whipped’?”

“Violin, a real man can take the whipping ;)”

“Funny stuff Phil!

Are you teaching the courses?”

“Oh no, they got Phil, that crazy women got Phil, sounds like a job for Aero and roseymonster - help bring him back fellas!

LMAo Phil!”

“After 29 years I think I have audited most of those courses against my will. My wife could teach them, no problemo.

Seriously, she knows I would flunk most of that stuff and cuts me some slack because I have a lot of life insurance. That also keeps me honest since I know I could die in my sleep.

Side note: About 15 years ago my wife audited one of my classes at the university. She got the highest grade on the mid-term (95). She wouldn't stop giving me grief about the 5 points she lost. I wouldn't let her take final.”

“Hooters Air takes to the skys”

“God Bless America.”

“That's a hoot!”

“This is for real?

Dang, I hope they take over!”

“Yup, it's for real. I think the maiden flight was today. Each flight will have two real stewies, and two Hooters girls serving food”

“ This topic has its own thread!”

“How on earth did I miss that !?! So much for the news flash.... He He He. I should have known that the HMWHC would be all over that !!”

“Geez HMWHC.... get with the program!! Chili is da man!! (I wondered how long it would take him to pooh-pooh your so-very-late attempts at news! And there he is! Chili for Prez of the club!)”

“Are you a member of the club? If not you can't nominate officiers!”

“*wink, wink, nudge, nudge* You can do it, stumprider”

“*digs out files of incriminating evidence and cell phone logs on Chili36*

Ahem...

Chili is doing a WONDERFUL JOB as event coordinator, and as our standing Legal advisor. For his greatness, we bestow upon him one EXTRA hooters girl at each outing, and 2 extra pitchers of beer.”

“I'm marred, er MARRIED, so I'm disqualified because of Section 2, Part A, subsection iii.

"Married men can be associate members of the club, but because of their questionable status, in regards to the purpose of the said club, may not hold office, engage in elections, nor influence the election of any candidate."”

“How could we have missed this event ?”

“We were all too busy reading porn?”

“I do want you to know that through diligence and pursuasive behavior, I have educated the Hooter's girls as to the best methods of putting down these silly protests .

I will remain available for consulting work if further training is necessary.”

“Damn, the filter at work blocked that.

I'll have to wait until I get home.

Sheesh.”

“Oh crap!
Mine went through. Was there something else on that page?
No Boss, I wasn't looking at porn!”

“Hey Stove, you need a job closer to the Appalachians anyway.”

“No worries SS, I don't think there is anything else on that page that would cause problems or it would be shut down here.

I work for the most conservative company in America.”

“That was funny!”

“Thanks chili!
Houses aren't selling in my subdivision right now!”

“The chick holding the sign is definitely correct...about herself, that is.”

“heh heh”

“Ditto what FG said.”

“Why is it that homely women are the only ones to protest displays of voluptuous, sensuous, titllating female flesh?”

“Because the good-looking ones are all too busy shakin' it down at Hooters'?”

“Sour grapes, mayhaps???”

“Hey, I dated those three ugly ones!”

“I have been to a deja' vu. I never saw any ugly ones.”

“There used to be one here in the town I live in. he sign shoulda been "3 halfway decent looking ones and other chicks who were hit with a sock full of nickels......."”

“I have found a nominee for the “Too Stupid to Carry Testicals” Award…

Saudi Weds Four in One Ceremony to Spite Ex-Wife

RIYADH (Reuters) - A Saudi man married four women in one night only to prove to his estranged first wife that he was still attractive, a newspaper reported on Saturday.

After the failed marriage which only lasted several months, the man's wife told him that "no woman would ever marry him," al-Watan newspaper said.
"So he swore to marry four women just to prove her wrong," it said.
Polygamy is relatively common in Saudi Arabia, a conservative society with deep Islamic and tribal roots. Under the country's Islamic law, men are allowed to marry up to four wives at the same time.

Yeah, he sure showed her, huh?”

“" estranged first wife "

I first read that as "e-strangled first wife"”

“Gee, makes me wonder what would have happened if I'd told my ex that if she jumped off the Empire State building, she'd still be too stupid to find her way to the ground.”

“'told my ex that if she jumped off the Empire State building, she'd still be too stupid to find her way to the ground.'

LOL! pedxing! I just have this image of 'OH, yeah? Well watch thiiiiiiiiiiiiiiis!', as she drops out of earshot.”

“BB you have mail”

“HMWHC news flash! I just saw my first porno!
















I can't believe how young I looked!”