EVIL LORD VOLDERMORT

“You give me back the body and soul of stikmon RIGHT NOW!!!”

“...but if you're not done with the soul yet, she'll take just the body for now...”

“D@mmit Lord Voldermort,,,,she needs her butt dart partner....”

“NOT LORD VOLDERMORT!!! FOR THAT INCURSION, YOU SHALL BE PUNISHED AS STIKMON IS. YOU SHALL DREAM MORE OF BBLINKLEY AND NOT OF STIKMON.

I SHALL KEEP THIS BODY UNTIL I AM FULLY SATISFIED THAT STIKMON IS NO LONGER A THREAT TO ME OR MY DEATH EATERS. WE SHALL PREVAIL...AND YOU WILL SUFFER GREAT PAIN AND SUFFERING FOR ALLYING YOURSELVES WITH A WEAK AND FOOLISH WIZARD SUCH AS STIKMON.”

“OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOhhhhhhhhhh NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOooooooooooo!! Not more dreams of bbinkley.

Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhh..... fate worse than death.

SHUDDER!!!”

“yawn”

“whooaoaoooooa

this is some role playing fantasy you guys have going!

Ther is definelty room to ask question about dungeons here . . .”

“I think you're onto something Lee. And chains too. Whips and chains. Lizs in leather, boots, stikkie hanging by his wrists from chains in the ceiling, candlelight playing on the cold stone walls, ... Yeah, reporters have to get their frustrations out somehow.”

“GERBILFEET, YOU WILL NOT FIND YOUR SIZE AT REI TONIGHT...YOU SHALL GO HOME WICKLESS.”

“Geobeet sounds like he's "been there; done that..."

(was that correct use of the semi-colon, Ed?)”

“what the hell have you people been into today?????

8)”

“The bongwater...”

“You have no clue.

”

“but here is an example

Weird Boot Thread”

“see, I'm fried.

one more time”

“Sorry Moldywart, they had the shirt in my size. HA-HA!”

“My dog-eared copy of The Elements of Style seems to have gone temporarily AWOL... But Looky What Just Arrived From Amazon! I haven't seen a copy of this in at least 15 years.

Anyone recognize these characters???

Frito & Dildo Bugger
Goodgulf Greyteeth (Wizard to Kings and Fairy Godfather, second class)
Spam Gangree
Pepsi & Moxie
Gimlet, son of Groin
Legolam the Elf
Stomper (Arrowroot, son of Arrowshirt, heir of Barbisol and King of Minas Troney
Bromosel

Tim Benzedrine & Hashberry

Garfinkel
Orlon

Cellophane and Lavalier

The Riders of Roi-Tan
Eorache, daughter of Eorlobe
Farahslax

Goddam

Serutan the Gauche

The Black Schleppers
The Lord of the Nozdrul
The Nameless No-No (Sorhed his own bad self)

(and bands of roving Narcs)



The inscription on the ring is different, too...

Grundig blaupunkt luger frug
Watusi snarf wazoo!
Nixon dirksen nasahist
Rebozo bugaloo!



And a short excerpt (no slacker copy&paste job, mind you).....


"The Ring and its bearer must go hence," agreed Goodgulf, "but where? Who shall guard it?"
"The elves ," said Gimlet.
"The dwarves," said Legolam.
"The wizards," said Arrowroot.
"The Men or Twodor," said Goodgulf.
"That leaves only Fordor," said Orlon. "But even a retarded troll would not go there."
"Even a dwarf," admitted Legolam.

Frito suddenly felt that all eyes were on him. "Couldn't we just drop it down a storm drain, or pawn it and swallow the ticket?" he said.
"Alas," said Goodgulf solemnly, "It is not that easy."
"But why?"
"Alas," explained Goodgulf.
"Alackaday," Orlon agreed.
"But fear not, dear boggie," continued Orlon, "you shall not go alone."
"Good old Gimlet will go with you," said Legolam.
"And fearless Legolam," said Gimlet.
"And noble King Arrowroot," said Bromosel.
"And faithful Bromosel," said Arrowroot.
"And Moxie, Pepsi and Spam," said Dildo.
"And Goodgulf Greyteeth," added Orlon.
"Indeed," said Goodgulf, glaring at Orlon, and if looks could maim, the old elf would have left in a basket.
"So be it. You shall leave when the omens are right," said Orlon, consulting a pocket horoscope, "and unless I'm very much mistaken, they will be unmatched in half an hour."”

“Sounds like it has more plot than The Elements of Style, but I am not as familiar with it.”

“Hot dang, I just figured out Italics!”

“Bored of the Rings

Henry N. Beard
Douglas C. Kenny
(c) the Harvard Lampoon, Inc., 1969”

“Congrats on the italics, LOL”

“I shudda paid more attention to the frickin names, LOL”

“I don't suppose any of you have read Doon, have you?”

“Don't Drink The Blue Stuff.”

“No Bit, I have not.”

“So where is evil Lord Moldywart this weekend. Lizs has been posting, so he's not with her.”

“I thought BP was just goofin' around, but nooooooooooooo.... LOL

Thanks! I'll have to check that out.”

“What he quoted was typical Lampoon stuff.

The Harvard Lampoon lampooned the NY Times once, and it was a hoot.”

“Interesting, Liz wants stikmons body?”

“Shoot, we can't even insult him to entice him out. Must be on the trail somewhere.”

“No problem Tilt. Like Bored of the Rings, Doon is funnier if you have read Dune.”

“Ahhhhhhhh yes, he was on the trail. More to come...........”

“Leave the Great Lord alone! You should all be kneeling in suplication to the great one!”

“A Troll defending the Lizard's Wizard. Now there's a plot line.”

“I have sent lizs a Church of SpongeBob exorcism kit.
Your days are numbered.”

“That was considerate of you SS, and would you be planning a trip to Iowa afterwards?”

“Only if she asks for help with the exorcism kit. I told her how to use it on another thread. She may need someone skilled with the Church of SpongeBob methods to help.
Just trying to be of service.”

“Now where did I hear that line of reasoning before?”

“The trees are full in the north”

“If nautical nonsense be something you wish,
Then drop on the deck and flop like a fish.”

“Moldywart is in the house.”

“I went into the hallowed woods, and purged the evil one from my body. It was a difficult procedure as the Dark Lord did not wish to evacuate my person easily.

He tried to thwart my activities at every turn this past weekend, but in the end, I was victorious. I am Stikmon, once again. Voldemort has been vanquished for a time. But, I caution you, be ever vigiliant, he is wiley and a slippery one, that Voldemort. But I know his tricks and will be there to defend and fight his onslaughts whenever and wherever I might be.

Its nice to see that there are kind and caring souls in the realm who were anxious for my return...

Oh Stove stomper...beware of the False Sponge Bob. There is one who presents himself as Sponge Bob, but verily is not the Bob! This false Sponge is non other than the Dark Lord, in personage of the kind and good hearted Sponge Bob. So, be forwarned and watch your back, lest the Dark Lord arise at your unawares.

I am back!!!

PS...STP gas line treatment is not STP gas line antifreeze!!!”

“Absorbent and yellow and porous is he...
Absorbent and yellow and porous is he...
Absorbent and yellow and porous is he...”

“Heet in the yellow bottle!”

“never send a mom to do your fuel shopping.”

“Earthquake map for the Missouri bootheel...”

“Well, that's the New Madrid Fault line, DOH!

It's not quite where he lives....”

“What's happening to stik is nobody's fault.”

“Twigs will rustle when the moon shine the brightest.”

“I do live right on the fault line of the New Madrid Fault zone.”