hardy har har....

“1) No matter how hard you try, you can't baptize cats.
2) When your Mom is mad at your Dad, don't let her brush your hair.
3) If your sister hits you, don't hit her back. They always catch the second person.
4) Never ask your 3-year old brother to hold a tomato.
5) You can't trust dogs to watch your food.
6) Don't sneeze when someone is cutting your hair.
7) Never hold a Dust-Buster and a cat at the same time.
8) You can't hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk.
9) Don't wear polka-dot underwear under white shorts.
10) The best place to be when you're sad is Grandma's lap.”

“LMAO

2 & 7 crack me up!”

“Ya 2 is scary!!!!!!!

)8O”

“Addendum to #9-
Don't try it with Ninja Turtles underpants either.”

“1) Raising teenagers is like nailing Jell-O to a tree.
2) Wrinkles don't hurt.
3) Families are like fudge . . . mostly sweet, with a few nuts.
4) Today's mighty oak is just yesterday's nut that held its ground.
5) Laughing is good exercise. It's like jogging on the inside.
6) Middle age is when you choose your cereal for the fiber, not the toy.”

“"Laughing is good exercise. It's like jogging on the inside."

I love it!!”

“I agree when you laugh it releases alkloids in the body that have a very good effect on you.

8)”

“The first number three is also true for rugby (those refs used to be backs and they keep messing with OUR game - BASTIDS).”

“Annex:

1: Cows think we own them because we like them while pigs are under no such illusion.

2. 'We are all better when we're loved.' (thanks to 'No Great Mischief' by Alistair McxLean)”

“Never criticize someone until you have walked a mile in their shoes.








Because then when you do criticize them, they have no shoes and you are a mile away.”

“Amen to that one!”

“1) Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional.
2) Forget the health food. I need all the preservatives I can get.
3) When you fall down, you wonder what else you can do while you're down there.
4) You're getting old when you get the same sensation from a rocking chair that you once got from roller coaster.
5) It's frustrating when you know all the answers, but nobody bothers to ask you the questions.
6) Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician.
7) Wisdom comes with age, but sometimes age comes alone.”

“Getting older; sure beats the alternative.

I'm not afraid of flying. Its crashing that scares me.”

“Alistair McLean, good author- i did a 12 page paper on him in highschool, i think it was the only thing i ever enjoyed doing in english class

-youre only as old as you act

later,
-nate”

“Hey, what ever became of Lippy the Lion?”