If you think you got it rough, ..

“And the story about the Australian guy, that's trying to get his ex-wife, to pay him back all the money he spent on his daughter....which turns out to be not his daughter. The man have suspected for a long time....but the ex refused to allow a blood test on "their" daughter.”

“the meth-milk story was a good one too”

“ont time when i was little i took a bunch of pop bottles in for money and i had them in my wagon, i picked them up in the ditches and all over town . well, the man asked me how many i had out there and i told him i had twice as many as i really had. he gave me the money and told me to put them in the bin out back. when i got home i was so proud of myself that i bragged to my dad how i snookered old man johnson down at the grocery store. dad wasn't ammused and made me go tell old man johnson what i had done. i learned my lesson and now i am a model citizen and fully rehabilitated.”

“An honest criminal...how unique.”