To TT'rs Everywhere - A Pre-Apology

“Dear Fellow TT'rs,

I would like to pre-apologize for anything I may say in the future, wheather over this message board, or in person regarding the following:

Bacon Rings
Pre-Marital Sex
Homosexuality
Hetrosexuality
Bi-Sexuality
Atheism (sp)
Religion
Dogs
Cats
Gerbils
Richard Gere
Slow F-ing Michigan Drivers
Rednecks
Black People
White People
Latino People
The French*
Asian People
Physically Challanged People
Mentally Challanged People
Vertically Challanged People
Bald People
Hairy People
Trekkies
Clowns
Menudo
West Coasters
Southerners
Northerners
Every college football team (except the Buckeyes of course)
Liberals
Facists
Republicans
Green Party People
Whigs
Vulgar Language
Dwarfs and Midgits
Heavy People
Very Thin People
Ugly People
Good-Looking People


I sincerely apologize, and will try to be more sensative in the future. Please forgive me, I am terribly sorry.

*Screw France, France sucks and always will, and I'll never apologize for it, EVER!

Sincerely, your pal,

Buddha Bear”

“Good list dude!

8)”

“Your apology offends me.”

“LOL @ corp,,,”

“Pre-apology accepted.”

“corp nasty - please view the "vertically challanged" category, that should cover it shorty!”

“wow them fighting words.....


Im ducking for cover”

“How did I miss that?”

“LMAO NAsty!”

“Realising I might in the future make comments that might offend some or all of the following, I also pre apologise to-

Morons
Window lickers
Fools
Idiots (Village or otherwise)
People (Village or otherwise)
Circus Folk
City Folk
Country Folk
Queer as Folk
Inanimate objects (This list applies to lots of things, such as beds, brooms, computers, the desks they hang out on, etc.)
Michael Douglas
The Thin Red Line and everyone involved with stealing those three hours of my life
Scrabble
Anyone who tries to drive on my roads
My gay blue car


Oh yeah, and I have to stick with BB when it comes to the French.

Sorry. Anyone who gets offended by any future comments of mine can send me their complaint in writing, so long as they use the proper paperwork. Preferably Charmin.”

“Buddha

I noticed you didn't include Tall people. Can we assume that you never plan to insult Tall people?”

“tall people suck!”

“The counter at Hot Dog Johnny's is offended.”

“I plan to offend as many people as humanly possible.”

“The counter at HDJ's has seen plenty of offense from me.”

“Last time I was there they were wondering when you are coming back to fix it.”

“Tell them they can send me the bill. Again, so long as it's written on Charmin so it can be properly processed in the right department.”

“Tell them they can send me the bill. Again, so long as it's written on Charmin so it can be properly processed in the right department.”

“Corp, glad you were able to eat my hot dogs last night without getting hurt.”

“It's not eating hot dogs that does him in; it's walking on flat ground! He needs rocks to keep his balance, unlike some of us.”

“I tried to stuff him as best as possible (keeps him from tipping over)”

“Hey! I liked the Thin Red Line you offensive mother #&%!$er.”

“I'ts not too bad on dvd. You can chapter skip the artsy-fartsy bs that way.”

“You can also skip the artsy fartsy stuff by throwing it in the garbage, or not buying it. I've tried not buying it, and that seems to work pretty well.”

“Pre-apology not accepted!”

“Or you can always do it the politician/professional athlete way. "If what I said offended you, well, I'm sorry........you were offended by what I said."”

“you forgot

Dumbass

mapleleaf”

“how come bald people have often hairy backs?”

“If what I said was offensive to anyone, and I'm not saying it was offensive, then I apologize for your inability to understand that I was not being offensive.”

“I'd like to preemptively apologize to anyone dumb enough not to recognize my obvious future taunts for what they are.”

“screw you, buddha.









:)”

“Stratdewd - It makes for a nasty 'comb-over'

I notice that Canadians are not on either list, unless they happen to fall into one of the other categories. Does this mean that you won't be offending us directly, or just not apologizing if you do ;-)”

“LOL @ Buddha Bear, just read this thread! :-)”

“you forgot food products”

“violin, you are sorry!






there, i apologized for him.....LOL!”

“What's this about West Coasters, BB?”

“He left out nearly bald people

SCR@W YOU BUDDHA”

“Hey! I liked the Thin Red Line you offensive mother #&%!$er."
mediaman
05:23:55 PM
01/27/03

Me too, ya french bastard!

BTW - and to hell with all those LOR TT names (yeah you raddy)

Oh #&%!$, did I cover that?”

“prolly uses a hoe too...HMPH!”

“BB, about this pre-apology - I pre-don't-accept.”

“How can a pre-apology be sincere?”

“Stratdude, testoterone causes baldness...and hairy backs too.”

“Hairy backs cause baldness?!!”

“It's okay to talk about good-looking people - we can take it.”

“i apologize for asking this....
"how come bald people have often hairy backs?"
stratdewd
06:35:03 PM
01/27/03

im sorry but no one needs to know why let alone ask this question....”

“I don't see the Irish on your list. You like those drunk bastages??”

“Pog ma hoin!”

“At it again, Pennsy me lad? I'm sure all us drunk bastages are gonna do our best to drink all your booze and leave you thirsty at FYAO.”

“Tilt you speak gaelic (sp?)”

“I pre-apologize
for the actions and behavior of
Pennsy Hiker, Artex, AmyG, Corporal Nasty, Twinkle Toes, Mrs. Adventurist, SirPete, Gremlin, Buddur (and his owner), Ice Tea, Buddha Bear, TomT, Tarabull, Capn Bobo and myself during Presidents Weekend.

Some of us may do the following and it may offend or annoy some individuals who are uptight:

Drink Booze
Burn Wood
Pull Sleds
Snowshoe
Yell
Stand With Arms Outreached In Blue Long-Johns
Throw Snowballs
Curse
Fart
Make "other" Noises
Walk Across Ice
Fall Thtough Ice
Take Your Parking Space
Post-Hole
Do Face-Plants
Make Offensive Remarks about Different Ethnicities Especially
Irish”