What You Were Born To Do

“I'm the big 2-4 and all today, so I'm feeling pretty reflective (or I've had too much coffee) and I've been thinking about this. Plus, I totally watched Oprah yesterday and there were all these people who found their "true meaning" and crap. I was wondering if any of you feel that you've found your "true calling?" If you think that sort stuff is just crap? If you aren't there yet, but you know what it is, etc? It's almost time for me to go burial plot shopping, so I need to think about this sort of thing. LOL!

I think one of my "true callings" is to be a mother. But I also let Newergirl eat Cocoa Puffs for every meal today and drink juice out of her Barbie bike water bottle, so maybe I ain't really good at that one. LOL!”

“I was bornd to smell stinky butts and pee...”

“You've listened to your soul voice and answered the call, Sarabell. Congrats! LOL!”

“newgirl, I'm 30, and have changed careers quite a few times, and am about to change again. Hopefully this time will be my last, as it is something I've really always wanted to do, and the others, well, weren't.

I've been a cardiopumlonary technologist (technical nurse, basically), producer in TV news, public relations account exec., and now I'm about to become a high school science teacher.

I've had no regrets whatsoever wearing the different hats that I've had. I've learned and experienced a lot by working in different fields and doing different things, been paid pretty well for the most part, and sincerely feel that if I hadn't have done all of what I did, I wouldn't have come to the conclusion which made me say to myself, "cut the crap, you've always wanted to teach, so just do it already!" :-)

Point being, things have a way of working themselves out. If you can't find the road, it'll eventually find you.”

“I think there are people out there who have a "true calling", and are following it. There are a lot more people who have a "true calling" and aren't following it for a myriad of reasons. The vast majority of people are working at jobs which basically pay the bills but offer little or no satisfaction, never mind a "true calling". A lot of people find that depressing, but a very wise man told me not to look for satisfaction in my job, but in the rest of my life. Jobs are for paychecks. I consider myself lucky because I don't dread going to work in the morning, which after having spent years doing just that, is good enough for me.”

“Yeah, that's what Oprah was all about yesterday. There was a lawyer who became a banker, a dr. that became an inner city teacher, etc. I'm just wondering what the opinions of TTers are on the subject.”

“well, profession-wise, i really don't have any goals. i'm not a particularly goal-oriented person, but i definitely know to listen to the "little voice inside me" that tells me what i need to do. i guess one of the most important things to me is to be myself, and keep in touch with the Inner Me. LOL! i can tell this is Oprah-derived.

anyhoo, i think one of my callings is to be a mother (one day), too...although the thought of carrying a child and going through labor sends me into dry heaves and makes me feel like passing out. LMAO! so i might have to get over that little hurdle first. AND, i intend to be madly in love for as much of my life as possible. that's one of my callings, no doubt.

oh yeah...and peeing! i'm good at that.
;-)”

“Good advice you got, Bit. That's my Dad's take too.”

“gawd, I am going through this exact same thought process, Newgirl!!!

but I am going to be 30 next month
=:0
EEEK!

Happy b-day NG.”

“Dry heaves and passing out may actually occur during labor Lyra. You've almost got it down, no worries. LOL!

I feel very passionate about alot of things, so it is hard for me to know, I guess. I'm kinda' goal oriented. It depends on how important the goal is too me, I guess.”

“So have you figured it AmyG? Or are you just in some kind of limbo or it. I have a friend from India and he told me that I should fast and pray on it.”

“Well, I was born to be a major league baseball player, but that didn't exactly work out. My job (traffic engineering consultant) is pretty interesting, but, more importantly, I rarely have to work overtime, so I'm able to do a lot of fun stuff, like travel, backpack, play with Cameron, go to movies w/Pamela, etc.

A friend of mine quit practicing law a year ago, went back to school and is now (or will be soon) teaching high school math. I'm not ready to do something like that just yet, but I'm not ruling anything out.

I try not to think of my job as the focus of my life, like a lot of people do.

Just a few thoughts....”

“I don't want my job to be the focus of my life either. I want to do something that is so meaningful to me that it is an intergral part of my life. If that means I make cotton candy for a living or I vaccinate children in Thailand, whatever. I just want to figure it out, in a timely manner.

BTW, I told my friend from India that I couldn't afford to fast. I need every oz. LOL! He laughed and told me to have a feast and pray then. LOL!”

“i was gonna say, don't be talkin' crazy now! (about the fast...lol)”

“A lot of guys have that problem Marty, of defining themselves by their careers. Now, I'd be lying if I said I didn't feel better about myself because I work in a technical profession, but I don't see writing programs on this idiot box as my "reason for being". When I feel like I need a reason for being, I go hug my kids.”

“BTW, newgirl, I didn't start doing what I'm doing until I was about 29....”

“I'm 37...and struggling to find what my passion is not just in a career but in life. There much wisdom on this thread it seems. I truly believe there is something for everyone..the trick is just finding it and being happy with yourself and your choice.”

“#&%!$, Martyb, I've only got 5 yrs. to get it in gear. Why'd you say that, man?!”

“Well said, bit. Fortunately, every now and then I work on a project or a study that will actually improve people's lives, and that is a good feeling. A better feeling, though, is after work when I pick up Cameron and he tells me about his day at school.”

“Feasting is good!! Prayer is even better :)”

“newgirl, Now that I think about it, age 32 would be a better description of when I started doing what I do - that gives you 8 years. Whew!”

“Thank God! LOL!”

“Actually, I'm like Artex. I'd really like to teach in the area of reproductive education. I fulfill that a little by volunteering right now. I'm not sure if I would like to do that here in the U.S. or become part of an International Volunteer Program and do it through that. Or I would like to be a child advocate or something along those lines. Or I would like to . . .”

“My 20-year college reunion is coming up this fall, and it will be interesting to see what people are doing or have done. I remember the last reunion how some people were doing pretty much what you'd expect, yet others were completely opposite (e.g., you thought they would be a real dynamo in business, but instead they were doing non-profit/activist type stuff; or vice versa).”

“I'd like to be a fast food taste tester. LOL! Kidding. Kinda'.”

“Yeah, that is weird huh Martyb. I went to h.s. w/ this total ego-maniac guy. Now he is working at a shelter for run-away teens. Crazy.”

“newgirl, Do you ever watch that CBS show, The Guardian? Pamela likes it because Simon Baker is, well, nice looking (I guess). He's a child advocate (initially forced to do it as community service for a drug conviction, but he likes it now). We have a friend who actually does that - it's really an important job - often frustrating and heart-wrenching, but also often rewarding....”

“I'm too busy to wait for opportunity or "my calling" to knock. It sounds like you're talking about a bunch of misfits struggling to find something they can claim to be their niche.”

“Newgirl, knowing I'm making a difference at work is important to me.. sounds the same for you.”

“my true calling was to be the Director of Talent Scouting for Hooter's Restaurants.....


one day.......”

“Lately I've tried to think back at some key turningpoints in my life and try to figure out why i took one path rather than another. There are a few major points and lots of minor ones. I think you make all these little, sub-concious decisions every day and end up moving in a direction you really want to.

So, I guess I was born to work in a cramped cubicle behind a computer and piles of paper and eventually rise to middle management. I feel so fulfilled!”

“Dare to dream, chili!”

“Get in touch with your

Archetype”

“Do I have to?”

“I like this, from humanpackmule - "My employers rent my time, they did not buy my life"
I don't look for any kind of fulfillment from my job other than filling my bank account and not dreading going to work every day.

As far as doing what I was meant to do, all I know is that everytime I took a class in college that interested me - like Geology or something - I was lucky to pass. Business classes that bored me to tears, I aced.
So I'm not a geologist, lol!”

“I was born to be your baby. You was born to be my man.”

“Dude, I didn't know you were gay.”

“NG --

I am 37 and I have NO f-ing clue. Really!


I like my job, my co-workers and my clients. I am reasonably well paid.

I was talking to a friend today at lunch. His bank was purchased and he has a golden parachute. He is stopping work May 1 to get accredited to teach and hopes to teach High School English or History.

We were talking about what his budget would look like and laughing, because he is in the position of trying to get by on only $140k. [his wife has a job that pays well, and he would get a teachers salary]. I mean . ..that sounds pretty stupid . . .how to get by on only $140k.

But . . .you work yourself into these corners. He has a house with a mortgage (no other debt), and two kids headed off to college, one next year, one the year after. They had hoped to be able to cover tuitions out of cash flow.


Anyhoo . . .sorry for the digression.

My rejoinder to him was . . .yeah . . .I was supposed to be a forest ranger . . .now I work 8-5 (when not on TT), have a house in Connecticut (of all places!!), a wife, two kids, a mortgage etc etc etc.


I love my wife and kids . . .and my house but . . ..HOW DID I GET HERE???!!!!!!!!!

I had no idea while still in college that there was such a thing as a trust manager .. . .and if I did, I am sure i would NOT have wanted to be one!!


Over the weekend I got a CD of Stop Making Sense by the Talking Heads. I think that Once in a Lifetime" is a great reflection of what we are talking about. The days go by, and one day you look up and say "well, how did I get here?"



David Byrne "once in Lifetime"

And you may find yourself living in a shotgun shack
And you may find yourself in another part of the world
And you may find yourself behind the wheel of a large automobile
And you may find yourself in a beautiful house, with a beautiful
wife
And you may ask yourself-Well...How did I get here?

Letting the days go by/let the water hold me down
Letting the days go by/water flowing underground
Into the blue again/after the money's gone
Once in a lifetime/water flowing underground.

And you may ask yourself
How do I work this?
And you may ask yourself
Where is that large automobile?
And you may tell yourself
This is not my beautiful house!
And you may tell yourself
This is not my beautiful wife!
Letting the days go by/let the water hold me down
Letting the days go by/water flowing underground
Into the blue again/after the money's gone
Once in a lifetime/water flowing underground.

Same as it ever was...Same as it ever was...

[I deleted lyrics here]

And you may ask yourself
What is that beautiful house?
And you may ask yourself
Where does that highway go?
And you may ask yourself
Am I right?...Am I wrong?
And you may tell yourself
MY GOD!...WHAT HAVE I DONE?

Letting the days go by/let the water hold me down
Letting the days go by/water flowing underground


I think that different folks get their satisfaction different ways.

I think its important that you figure out where YOUR passion lies . . .and then let the rest of your life fall around that.

I think it should come naturally.

My passions are working with my hands outdoors. Whether its stonework, gardens or just labor.

Being outdoors for recreation, be it hiking, kayaking, skiing or whatever.

And my life and the job I hold, allows me to do that.

Way leads on to way.

For some people job ambition and sucess is the driver, and that's great. For some people the job is a means to an end. Providing the resources, and freedom to do other things. Some people combine both: A job that is their passion and fulfills them.”

“I lost my train of thought on the post above. Chhoooooo Chooooooo chugga chugga.




anyhoo . . .Lyra was kinda right . .if you have a strong "gut instinct" that would help. I mean, me for instance, I would have hoped that I wouldn't have found myself in downtown NYC 25 years from now wondering what I was doing.

My frustration now is that I don't get the outdoor time I would like.

My kids are too small to push too hard, and although my wife loves the outdoors and thrives on it, it is to a lesser degree. She aint camping in a snowbank anytime soon. SHe has doubts about family tenting in the mountains. SHe knows how important this stuff is to me, but doesn't always get it.

I sometimes wish that geographically I was closer to New Hampshire and Maine so that it wasn't always 3-4 days away from the family when I go out.

\



WAIT . . . .I LOST MY DAMN TRAIN OF THOUGHT AGAIN.


THIS ISN'T HELPFUL TO YOU. FOR GOD'S SAKE . . .SOMEONE CALL PEDXING . . .I AM IN NEED OF A CONSULT!!!!




Whew . . . ..


find your passion, arrange your life around it.

Be it Newergirl, Ty, CEO of MOntapalooza XXII, guidance counseler, social worker, or whatever.”

“Funny bit of trivia on the video for that Talking Heads tune...during the part where he is saying "Same as it ever was", he is making the ASL sign for "degeneration".”

“Bit --

That is funny . . .because the song does degenerate right there . . .I cut out a whole bunch of "off point" lyrics about blue water and stuff.”

“To backpack and be wild and full of energy and to be like the class clown!

8)”

“First, after reading Artex's background, I have to say he is eminently qualified to be a teacher -- heart surgery and media production will both prove to be arenas that he'll relate to in the classroom.

Words have always been "it" for me. I was a journalist, and now teach writing. I collect books and write poetry. I can't help being quick with a phrase or turning words around for fun. But I also think that the fascination with words was connected to an inquisitiveness -- that magically, words could help me frame questions (if not always find answers) and experience other realities as well as express myself. I love to learn new things, and journalism and teaching have both served that passion. It is something I would still be doing even if it wasn't my "job;" in fact, I'd have more time for it once I got rid of the administrative tasks (paperwork) that are part of formal education. I have to remind myself that I've been pretty lucky to put my passion/talent to work as a career twice now.”

“Isn't this a twist on the classic: what is the meaning of life? I don't think I know yet.

I always wanted to be a writer because that's what I excelled at scholastically. I've spent the past six years becoming an "expert," and specializing in a narrow topic. Before that, I was a "generalist" and thought I wanted to be an expert. Now I'm thinking that it's too confining and I want to broaden out again.

But ya know, I'm taking a break from all this, in fact, taking a break from everything that is stable about my life (except for the wifey:)) and plan to do some soul searching about what I want to do with my life. I'm confortable about who I am but I just am not sure what I want outta this one life we have to live. I want kids. I want to own a house. I want to give running a restaurant a shot. I think I can predict trends pretty well. But right now, in my current career, I'm sorta at a crossroads of either continuing to specialize or making a break and doing something new.

I think when I get back, I'm probably just gonna try to make as much damn money as I can, probably using the information I know from my current job. I've never taken that attitude about work before but I'm going to have to when I return from South America because the bank account is gonna be empty.”

“Why search for the path that you have always traveled?

- it sounds abit fatalistic, but we are all on the trail that we should be on. Life is soo short, how could it be otherwise? What is important is to live fully in the moment, and to strive for true happiness (good friends help!). The struggle is to be happy and to be content. If we were all truly happy, it wouldn't matter what our profession is. I think "True Calling" is a matter of being in the right place at the right time. It could take years, it may happen overnight, or the calling may never come. Sometimes it's as important to find out what you are not good at. Respect yourself, respect others, and go hiking every chance you get! Too simple an answer? Try it!

-- can you smell the incense burning?!?”

“I was born to live...I never worked a job i really hated.I've always been interested in finance and was a pretty damn good stock trader in the 90's.I loved it,made great bux.It helped achieve some of my goals.But didnt leave me with a great sense of accomplishment.Hey but I didnt have a boss and I worked when i wanted to.It was plush.Anyway,life is what u dont plan for and i got crushed by the bear market.I've had no clue for 2 yrs as to what im gonna do!!Im in my mid-late-30's!!!One thing i do try is setting up trips to places ive always wanted to go.Last year i did a few killer trips and this year i think im headed to B.C. and perhaps a 10day trip to the Swiss Alps.Altho i got jack chit going on job/career wise i know a lot of peeps my age who have it all and are slaves to the grind.That thought makes me terrified.Im pretty happy in life.I play my guitar,check out sunsets,ride my bike,backpack,do photography,work odds n ends and just try to make this TRIP called LIFE as varied as possible.
O ya,i dont know how to get my old psw for davex so i just created davexx...got a new dell that rocks...”

“I was born to be a Calvin Klein underwear model.

Don't hate me for being beautiful.”

“capn bobo,
I agree...but i hate incense as much as cigarettes.
Yup,life is short so u gotta smell the roses and what it has to offer and then question whether u wanna throw all that away so u can work in a box,to buy a box to live in and then get buried in a box!!!Talk aabout being boxed in!!”

“I was born to roam the woods and get paid for it!”

“Artex-

the NY/NJ PR world wasn't too fun, huh? Where are you teaching?

Bongo”