GORETEXX waiting.....

“According to Dionne Warwick, the only thing you climbed was the phone book to sit on so your head could see over the kitchen table. She told me the closest you came to K whatever, was by pausing your mastrubatorial habits while skipping though your favorite early 70's National Geographic's (ya know, the ones with full frontal African tribal nudity), and saw the mountain.

Note to self: Dionne Warwick has as much psychic ability as Goretexx has mountaineering skilz.

Artex & Twinkle Toes 6, Goretexx 0”

“Hey Gortexx if I may say let me tell you I think it would be wise to leave these people alone becuase I have the whole scoop on what you did and I was you I would drop all of this and leave this message board.

8|”

“Becuase if you don't I will find a way to make you.

8|”

“Hey, don't run him off. I need a good laugh every now and again. "'E's a big'n myte, 'e truly is!"”

“No but it is very easy to call the police!!”

“"I'll be leaving tonight to try a hand at my 1st accent of the "Willis Wall""

It makes me wonder if the accent is phony as well as the ascent?”

“*munchs on popcorn* This is better then Days of our Lives.”

“its been said before:

"Goretexx". Australian for "Puerto Rican from Brooklyn".”

“'E really don't 'ave an accent, 'at's what's funny.”

“lol...Hey Buddha, That National Geographic comment hit a little close to home. Have you been spying on me? I swear it was only the one time.”

“Man, some of those pygmies were hot though!”

“Westerners don't like fakes or posers any more than easterners. That bungee going to be tied around your neck?”

“It would if Twinkle tied it!


Mooooooooooooooooooohaaaaaaaaaaahaaaaaaaa”

“I think that would be called a noose, not a bunge....lol”

“Shhhhh, don't tell th' little blighter. 'E'll never know. Tell 'im it's Australian fer necktie!”

“GOODIE! We westners like them hangin's jus' fine!”

“Ahem, those are called necktie parties, pahdnuh!”

“all right necktie partie

yeah!!
oh geo is bringing the beer, dont forget your launge chair! i have my camera all ready!”

“What a coincedence. Looking to my immediate right I see the following sign:


NOTICE!
To Thieves, Thugs,
--Fakirs--
And Bunko-Steerers
among whom are
J.J. Harlin, alias "Off Wheeler;"
SAW DUST CHARLIE, Wm. Hedges,
--- Billy the Kid ---
Billy MULLIN, Goore-Teks, The Cutter,
Little Jack, Pock-Marked KID
And About Twenty Others:
-----------------------------
If found within the limits of this
city after TEN O'CLOCK P.M.,
this night, you will be Invited to
Attend a GRAND NECK-TIE PARTY'
-----------------------------
The Expense of which will be borne by
100 Substantial Citizens

New York City, February 24, 2003.

Sheriff.”

“That just about seems to .... sum it all .... up.”

“LOL
I think he is just looking for over 100 posts, gee I wonder if jello mold is goretex?”

“No, Jello Mold knows how to spell.”

“LOL!

bet this isn't the kind of attention crybabytex was looking for!”

“he is not worth playing with anymore, let this thread die along with his attitude!!

may peach march and this thread go to cyber heaven!!”

“peach march, you say?

We've got a lot o' those down here. The funny thing is... Georgia is supposed to be 'the peach state,' but everyone goes over to South Carlina for peaches.”

“Excuse Me. That should've been 'Soccer Liner'.”

“I thought that was a Sousa march.”

“Soccer Liner, isn't that the Pimento State?”

“And so, as the sun sets in the west, Goretexx's territorial display has not had the intended effect of running off the interlopers. But territorial displays are mostly for show anyway. He slinks from the valley back to his mountain lair, the territory unconquered by mere men, where only the sure-footed creatures can trod with impunity. It is a land where only one intrepid explorer has set foot, the fearless and mighty Walter Mitty. Goretexx rigs the crampons onto his boots and begins digging into the icefall, ta-pocketa, ta-pocketa. Sure-footed and stealthily he climbs, the valley falling away below into the mist of clouds. Up above the mountain looms, and on Goretexx climbs, ta-pocketa, ta-pocketa. He uses no oxygen tank, because real Australian climbers do not use oxygen in the outback. He wears no sissy parka or mittens. He is the mighty Walter Mitty er, uh, Goretexx, and he keeps digging the crampons into the ice, ta-pocketa, ta-pocketa.”

“LOL @ me

i think I would rather be at a peach march.”

“Don't REAL Australian climbers have a pouch?

And whatever happened to Bunyip? I'll bet he could clear this up... He was an actual person, LOL”

“Maple, the Peach March is usually in June. That's when we march over the river into Soccer Liner to get the peaches.

You don't wanna know about the Vidalia Onions....”

“Say, Can't the Goretex company sue this moron for bad promises under their company name????”

“Right mates- Are you all shiverin in yout Vasques yet? I've said some reeealy scary stuff here, I even added in a bit about the full moon, since that'll scare anyone. I'm scary like the full moon.
I have unfinishes business in New York, which is why I came back from Georgia, where I was climbing K2. (again.) Crikey, that bloody mountain pops up everywhere, don't it? Fair dinkum. Anyway, my unfinished business WILLLLLL be finished this time, I swear it. There's a shelf at EMS that still needs to be stocked, and they won't give me my last paycheck till I do it. G'day. Oh, and there's something to do with a rooster I think, or maybe it was somrthing else- Yeah, that's it, it was a c0ck I was looking for. Blimey.”

“Boretex - I don't know who you are - but your posts have me cracking up! Good show mate!”

“goretexx??????????????
you mean somebody is more on the $h!t list than ME............I like this goretexx dude :>)”

“Jello Fog, even you have more dignity than this goretexx runt.

I'm still in awe that this tool had the nerve to show up here and subject himself to ridicule. Ha!

Hey Zay.. stick around mate.. somebody of your obvious intelligence who carries an ice axe and practically no water during a hike along the NJ AT when it's nearly 90 degrees out can surely be dumb enough to stick around and subject himself to further ridicule. What a tool! Cheers mate!”

“I like this goretexx dude........keep them busy goretexx......I need a break, whew!”

“Who is this guy, and what's he going to do to that rooster?”

“Johnmck - probably what Scottish sheep herders do to their flock.”

“Hey, sheep need love too. Umm I mean yeah.....what Artex said.”

“We have laws against that kind of thing here.”

“watch it bub (Artex) - don't pull a Pennsy ;) by insulting folKs with your cultural slurs - damnit - Scots men need lovin too!”

“Yeah, and the sheep too. They are scotish.”

“I didn't say all Scots have sex with sheep (like goretexx apparently does with roosters), just the Scottish sheep herders! :-)”

“I don't know about the rooster, but I think he's going to be choking the chicken for a while...”

“I'm likin' this goretexx dude more every thread..........where is he”

“err... I think I must of missed out on something somewhere. What the heck happened?”