Chili's Thread - All about Chili

“What's the difference between a trampoline and a lawyer?

You take your shoes off to jump on the trampoline.”

“Could chili and Marvin be one and the same? Have any of you seen them together in the same room, uh, I mean shelter or tent?”

“How could we? Nobody's ever seen Marvin.”

“A serial killer walks into a bar with a daypack and bellies up to the bar and orders a Fat Tire ale. The gentleman sitting to his right proceeds to tell him one of his personal favorite lawyer jokes. The serial killer finishes his beer and then cuts off the gentleman's head and puts it in his daypack and walks out. The bartender astounded by what he has just witnessed says, "I should've been a longshoreman!"”

“Chili, Chili, Chili.....you are honored among humanity to have such an elevated thread dedicated to just little ole YOU! This bizzarro thread must be your karma for dissing chili with BEANS, my friend, BEANS.

Yes, I said BEANS. (In chili!)”

“Did I mention that I could cook a better batch of chili than chili?

No beans, just chili.

CASI rules.”

“look, you anti-bean fools, when chili has meat in it it's called chili con carne = "chili with meat." therefore, JUST chili shouldn't even have meat in it.

and don't get chili mixed up with chile, or i'll be forced to get very huffy and frustrated! grrr.”

“It's all Chili, all the time!”

“WHERE is Mr. Chili??”

“WTF? I go out last night, drink a couple of beers, meet this hot red headed chick, engage in.....


well, never mind.....

A thread about chili. Cool.

Tilt, here is everything you need to know about "no beans" .

Bacpac, I am a world class chili cook, I will cook chili anywhere, under any conditions, and still kick your ass doing it.”

“I guess we need to have a chililapooza. Just say NO to beans.”

“Beans...beans....ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh”

“Okay, I gotcha.

Hmmm... I didn't know there were such things as 'chili prophets' in the world, <G>”

“Beans, beans musical fruit
The more you eat the more you toot.
The more you toot, the better you feel.
Let's have beans with every meal.
(Repeat)

So play your horn and make it toot,
With an S.B.D. or a mega poot
Do a cheer, let's give a hoot
Ya gotta love them beans as a musical fruit”

“Jerry Jeff Walker's Viva Terlingua Album had the classic song...

If You Know Beans About Chili You Know That Chili Has No Beans
You burn some mesquite
And when the coals get hot
You bunk up some meat and you throw it on a pot
With some chile pods and garlic
And comino and stuff
Then you add a little salt
Till there’s just enough
You can throw in some onions
To make it smell good
You can even add tomatoes
If you feel like you should
But if you know beans about chili
You know that chili has no beans

If you know beans about chili
You know it didn’t come from Mexico
Chili was God’s gift to Texas
(Or maybe it came from down below)
And chili doesn’t go with macaroni
And damned Yankee’s don’t go with chili queens;
And if you know beans about chili
You know that chili has no beans.”

“what's black and brown and looks good on a lawyer?











a doberman.

what do you can a lawyer parachuting from a plane?













skeet.”

“"a doberman"?? :-D not that you feel violent toward them or anything, huh, Rosey? LOL!

to think, i've never heard that second verse, StoveStomper! i've been missing out.”

“It all was in jest :)

Sheesh, i can't even tall a joke right (can=call in 2nd joke).”

“i know, i know! :-)”

“Why have scientists begun to use lawyers instead of lab rats for research?

1. Lawyers are more plentiful. (You got this one.)

2. They are easier to train.

3. Researchers don’t get attached to them. (You got this one, too.)”

“i raise my glass of glog and salute you chiliehead!









but i gotta tellya, i'm a beans-in-ma-chilli man.....”

“I didn't know about REAL chili until visiting Albuquerque (sp?) last fall. I LEARNED!!!”

“when i make chili, the following day i make enchaladas with the leftovers.....


strat's world famous enchaladas....mmMMMMmmMMMm


garfum's tried um. they good ain't it garfie ole buddy?”