I am a mass murderer,,,

“...and I am having nightmares.

My sons have an aquarium in their room that just won't stay clean, because the guppies have reproduced and reproduced and reproduced. Too many fish, way too many fish.

So, while the boys were in school, I took the net, and grabbed about 10 of the little poopers...and there were still too many in the tank...so I cruelly scooped up more...I felt like a nazi in a death camp...and I dumped about 20 guppies into the toilet...and hit the plunger.

Now the nightmares...like the hand in Deliverance...I imagine my wife going to the kitchen and filling a pot with water, only to discover that it is filled with guppies....
or my sons coming home from school only to discover that the guppies have somehow swam back up the pipes and are swimming around in the toiles...my evil deed exposed...never to be loved or trusted by my children again....”

“Did you cackle evilly while you did it?”

“That should of course be "...that the guppies have somehow swam back up the pipes and are swimming around in the toilet..."”

“No, I grinned maniacally...”

“You could try the old, "They would have died anyway, I was just accelerating the process."”

“Fritz! that's worse than boiling bunnies!
=D”

“you could of sold them as feeder fish to the pet store.”

“They think they are salmon and swimming upstream to spawn...”

“You're also a life saver. If you hadn't done this then they would have either started using all the Oxygen in the tank, or created too much waste, and your nitrites and nitrates would have gone through the roof and killed them all, slowly. Just explain to the ones chosen for execution that the needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few :o)”

“I have a 6 inch goldfish in a ten gallon...(it grew since I bought it as a tiny little shubunkin) should I get a bigger tank?”

“ynamiynami, if you are a woman, I love you...if you are a man, then "You da MAN!"

Thanks, I am a lifesaver...I feel better now... ;)”

“Get a bigger toilet...”

“Free, I would take it back where I bought it and demand a refund. I hate it when you get a defective one that lives for more than six weeks...”

“KODOS!”

“I have had it over a year :S!

I don't know what it is but I can never kill them. I usually end up giving them to a friend who has a backyard pond.”

“get a couple of catfish to keep the population low...”

“I used to have guppys but they alwasy ATE their young...”

“thanks for that Fritz ;o) man btw”

“I had a small fish bowl as a kid.

I would clean the bowl more or less unsupervised and often refilled the bowl with water a bit too tepid. Result, poached fish, yet my parents let me go out and get more!

Anyone ready for a bath? ;-}”

“Tell them you were just setting them free to live the wild life they were always meant to live--as food for Bass in a nearby lake. It could work.”

“Who knew what was lurking under that quiet exterior. I’m a little worried about going on any more group hikes with Fritz, he might decide there are to many hikers and eliminate a few us.”

“fritz,

you're an evil, evil man.

buy an oscar or african cichlid, you're guppy problem will be solved. after all, they won't stop doing what they do best, and soon you'll have too many guppies again.”

“Someone call PETA.

Only once did my swordtails gave birth....60 fishies...they all eventually got eaten...I separated them in a screen enclosure...but they kept on escaping out.”

“Heck,Nightmares are the least of your worries!! After those guppies have lived in the sewers for a couple years and you have forgotten all about flushing the little beggers they will come back as mutated deformed sharklike killer guppazoids!!! Think about that next time you go swimming!!
Streamweaver”

“You should read up on the origins of the Chicago city's water sources. Taking a bath used to be a rather piscatory experience. It was common for minnows to come out of the tap.”

“he found a lil kitty under a tree and thought it was a toy...he grabbed it and shook it and wanted to play with it...and he broke it...I had to break its lil neck to put it out of misery, and then I burried it...I was so upset with him for doing that...and I made him feel rotten, I called him the kitty killer for 2 days...he was quite miserable.”

“must hike...fear me.

;)”

“Blech, can this thread get anymore depressing? How can I ever hike with a guileless guppy murderer again? And Khatru always looked so cute and harmless, I'm heartbroken!”

“guppy murder... :P”