Thought for the day.

“Thought for the day......
There is more money being spent on breast implants and Viagra than Alzheimer's research.

This means that by 2020, there should be a large elderly population with perky boobs and huge erections and absolutely no recollection of what to do with them.”

“All the people that don't particapate in boob implants and viagra will still be hiking and feeling fine.
rox”

“Subject: Sunburn Treatment


A guy falls asleep on the beach for several hours and gets horrible
sunburn. He goes to the hospital and is promptly admitted after being
diagnosed with second degree burns. He was already starting to blister
and
in
agony.

The doctor prescribed continuous intravenous feeding with saline and
electrolytes, a sedative, and a Viagra pill every four hours,
The nurse, rather astounded, said, "What good will Viagra do him?"
The doctor replied, "It'll keep the sheets off his legs”

“If you didn't know how old you were, how old would you be?”

“If a bear #&%!$s in the woods and there's no one around to smell it, does it still stink???”

“Today is yesterdays tomorrow.”

“yea, and yesterday is tomorrows two days ago.”

“If I answer the phone why does the person on the other end as me if I am home?? Duhh!!”

“Maybe they're callin' your cell number???”

“Today is the first day of the rest of my life........Tomorrow will be the same.........”

“If Ohio Hiker had a baby, it'd look like a kleenex pocket-pack.”

“When you're riding in a time machine way far into the future, don't stick your elbow out the window, or it'll turn into a fossil.

It takes a big man to cry, but it takes a bigger man to laugh at that man”

“A truly wise man never plays leapfrog with a unicorn.”

“oh man like never fart on a bus crowded with old ladies”

“Dad always thought laughter was the best medicine, which I guess is why several of us died of tuberculosis”

“"If you didn't know how old you were, how old would you be?"

Probably about 20. The only difference between me from back then is that I pay my bills on time now. Otherwise, I'm the same immature, grown-up kid, and proud of it.”

“True dat, artex”

“Satchel Paige, right?”

“The crows seemed to be calling his name, thought Caw”