The Slacker is Back

“There's beer in my pack and Sandles on my feet
And I am not all that far from my home

It's Tuesday afternoon and
While you're all at work
To my hammock I will roam

No muddy trails
Or Micah dog tails

No mosquito nets or
Skeery Woofbare threats

No Psycho Squirrels or
ranting girls

Here I will slack
With no clothes on by back
As I sip on a Michelob Light

No monkey pox or
palooza gridlocks

No rock hard beds
overlaoded geer sleds,

or scumbag Republican threads

So leave me alone,
As I slack here at home

And someone fetch me another cold beer”

“I am taking tomorrow off, just so I can be a slacker too.”

“LMAO”

“Why pack when you can slack?”

“That's wonderful encouragment!!

I'm taking tomorrow off!!

WooHoo!!”

“Take Off, you hosers!”

“Somebody has to do it. I will go to the game (AAA Redbirds), pay to park, buy beer and food, and visit the downtown establishments after the game.

The way I look at it, I am doing as much to drive the economy as the last "tax break".”

“You call that slacking? C'mon! there's planning involved.... and walking”

“I have the tickets to the skybox....


trust me, I will be slacking.”

“Parking is absolutely free at Single A Augusta GreenJackets games... and it's almost Thirsty Thursday!

No skyboxes... LOL


(yeah, I know... a complete idiot named the team)”

“Was it a relative of yours who named the team, Tilt, or are you just used to hearing people express their disbelief at the name?”

“Just about everyone thinks the name SUX, lol... The mascot is like a Yellow Jacket type insect, but instead of being black & yellow, it's Blue & Green! <BLECH>

It HAS to be 'golf-related' in this town, donchaknow. They named the hockey team...


(Wait



For



It...)



The LYNX.


_<ARGH>”

“Poems
1)There once was a small, yellow duck
He got hit by a large, blue truck
He lost his head
Now he is dead
So ducks don't cross when there are trucks
My Philosophies
1)Never put off until tomorrow what you can put off until next week
2)Life is short don't be a #&%!$
3)There's no time like now to put off doing stuff
4)Karma
5)A watched pot never boils. An Unwatched pot boils over. Either way you,re screwed.
6)When push comes to shove, don't fall down.
Eternal Questions
1)What's not in a hotdog?
2)What doesn't cause cancer?
3)If money is the root of all evil why do churches always ask for it?
4)Why don't monkeys grow beards?
5)Do monkey's marry?
6)Why is it called alcoholics anonymos when the first thing you say is "Hi. My name is Bob and I'm an alcoholic"?
Other sayings
1)Who ever said nothing is impossible; ever tried slamming a revolving door?
Homework Excuses
1)A bully made me eat it”

“Stop looking at me swan!”

“From the slapstick capital of the world its pingpong with your dingdong time.

That's right folks
We're all pumped up and coming at you live

So grab a couple balls and your paddle and start whacking”