Me to Bush: Uncle!

“As a liberal guy, I disagree with most of what our current president says. I feel I could hold my own if debating various policies with him, etc. I will often state that I'm better than George at X or Y. But now I fear I have found an area that I couldn't win. The results from Bush's latest physical exam were announced the other day, and, by all indications, it appears he could pretty much whup my ass if it came down to that. It turns out that we are of identical height, 5-11¾. I've always known he was a runner of sorts, although I suspect his pace per mile is exaggerated a bit (I'd like to man the stopwatch to see if he actually can do 3 miles at 7-minute pace). Now I've been injured and unable to run a whole lot for the past year and a half, and I had my body fat tested back in December (25% - ouch!). Since then, I've been running more and lifting some weights, so I not only lost a bunch of my fat weight, but added muscle. So now, at 152 pounds, I'm probably sporting about 15% body fat - I'm very satisfied with that. I'm probably more muscular than I've ever been and feeling pretty strong.

But lo and behold, our muscleman president weighed in at 194 pounds - 42 pounds more than me! - and just under 15% body fat. And he actually gained 5 pounds of muscle since last year! All this when he even missed 6 weeks of running due to a torn calf muscle! How do you do it, George?!




Unless, of course, they just made up that part about the body fat.....”

“Naw, you're just a wuss.”

“Plus, he really made a come-back after choking on that pretzel! That probably would have laid a normal guy up for weeks!”

“I always thought he looked shorter than that. He's my height and weight. I guess we're kinda like those good Kirk/evil Kirk guys.”

“Yeah, except you would be the gay Kirk.”

“Come to think of it, you wouldn't have to be all that strong to whup me if you weigh 194 pounds - just sit on me until I give up!”

“Again TPM shows his fascination with all things homosexual.”

“Is that why he is so interested in you vio?”

“There they go again, Tweedledum and Tweedledummer - the schoolyard chums.”

“I think the Shrub gained 5 lbs of muscle mass between his ears, LOL”

“Well, he lives at the most exclusive gym in the country. Glad to see that he spends most of his time staying fit.”

“ann coulter could whip you liberal panty waists


BAAAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHA! ! !”

“Geo is just jealous of the Pres!”

“Hah! I knew this thread would get strat in here!

Maybe we could set up some kind of gladiator competition between Bush and one or more of his challengers. Now THAT would be fun to watch!”

“i remember seeing bush on leno, before the election and leno asked him if he was really a serious runner. bush replied....i'd put it all on a foot race....”

“A team competition would be good.

Liberal panty-waists and studs versus conservative chicken hawks and sissies.”

“Just like he ran away from the National Guard? LOL”

“Good one, Tilt!”

“If it wasn't for Daddy Bush's connections, he would've had to run to Canada, LOL”

“Or they could have set him up in a country with a friendly fascist dictator like say, Philipines, or Guatemala.”

“ARTHUR: Right! Charge!
KNIGHTS: Charge!
[mayhem]
FRENCH GUARD: Hey, this one is for your mother! There you go.
[mayhem]
FRENCH GUARD: And this one's for your dad!
ARTHUR: Run away!
KNIGHTS: Run away!”

“Python?”

“Now, go away or I will taunt you a second time!”

“(nasty Frenchies!)”

“I fart in your general direction! Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries!


Is there someone else up there we can talk to?”

“i bet you run like a girl , tom




not that there's anything wrong with that.....”

“MIDDLE HEAD: You're lucky. You're not next to him.
LEFT HEAD: What do you mean?
MIDDLE HEAD: You snore!
LEFT HEAD: Oh, I don't. Anyway, you've got bad breath.
MIDDLE HEAD: Well, it's only because you don't brush my teeth.
RIGHT HEAD: Oh, stop #&%!$ing and let's go have tea.
LEFT HEAD: Oh, all right. All right. All right. We'll kill him first and then have tea and biscuits.
MIDDLE HEAD: Yes.
RIGHT HEAD: Oh, not biscuits.
LEFT HEAD: All right. All right, not biscuits, but let's kill him anyway.
ALL HEADS: Right!
MIDDLE HEAD: He buggered off.
RIGHT HEAD: So he has. He's scarpered.
MINSTREL: [singing] Brave Sir Robin ran away,
ROBIN: No!
MINSTREL: [singing] Bravely ran away, away.
ROBIN: I didn't!
MINSTREL: [singing] When danger reared its ugly head, he bravely turned his tail and fled.
ROBIN: No!
MINSTREL: [singing] Yes, brave Sir Robin turned about
ROBIN: I didn't!
MINSTREL: [singing] And gallantly, he chickened out. Bravely taking to his feet,
ROBIN: I never did!
MINSTREL: [singing] He beat a very brave retreat,
ROBIN: All lies!
MINSTREL: [singing] Bravest of the brave, Sir Robin.
ROBIN: I never!

LOLOL”

“lmao”

“Put a bunch of politicans in a Eco-Challange. Trim it down a bit from the 300 milers we see on TV.”

“stratdewd, ya lousy sniper!”

“yeah yeah....admit it, you laughed....”

“I gotta admit......it was just lame

Sorry dewd!

I'll bet you run like a chicken hawk!”

“Then there was that bit of bother with the bunny...


TIM: Look, that rabbit's got a vicious streak a mile wide! It's a killer!
GALAHAD: Get stuffed!
TIM: He'll do you up a treat, mate.
GALAHAD: Oh, yeah?
ROBIN: You mangy Scots git!
TIM: I'm warning you!
ROBIN: What's he do, nibble your bum?
TIM: He's got huge, sharp-- eh-- he can leap about-- look at the bones!
ARTHUR: Go on, Bors. Chop his head off!
BORS: Right! Silly little bleeder. One rabbit stew comin' right up!
TIM: Look!
[squeak]
BORS: Aaaugh!
[dramatic chord]
[clunk]
ARTHUR: Jesus Christ!
TIM: I warned you!
ROBIN: I done it again!
TIM: I warned you, but did you listen to me? Oh, no, you knew it all, didn't you? Oh, it's just a harmless little bunny, isn't it? Well, it's always the same. I always tell them--
ARTHUR: Oh, shut up!
TIM: Do they listen to me?
ARTHUR: Right!
TIM: Oh, no...
KNIGHTS: Charge!
[squeak squeak squeak]
KNIGHTS: Aaaaugh!, Aaaugh!, etc.
ARTHUR: Run away! Run away!
KNIGHTS: Run away! Run away!...



Somebody stop me... before I paste again!!!”

“There was also the Black Beast of Aaauugh who ate Brother Maynard, but enough is too much already! LOL



I forgot that at the very end the cop tells them to...

"Run along!"



<GUFFAW>”

“you slay yourself , tilt....”

“Go kiss some more o' that Republican Chickenhawk ass.”

“Somehow I'm getting this image of Al Gore in the "Ministry of Silly Walks" sketch....”

“this parot is deceased....


no it isn't ....”

“You must admit, Al got Lots closer to Da Nang than any of the Bush babies... <G>”

“I'd take the Bush challenge.”

“I'll bet Dunadan could paint Dubya's ass red!”

“I appreciate the vote, TT.”

“His ass probably is red. After all, he talks like a baboon!”

“Not you, Dun! Bush...”

“Ha ha ha ! ! !

treebeard, you deserve an award for that!

How about a nice Kentucky Waterfall?”

“Oooo, I dunno, Kentucky Waterfall sounds like Daisy Mae standin' over you and lettin' go!

Well, that might be more properly called a "Dogpatch Downpour".

How about a nice Ape Drape?”

“Here's the reason Martyb.

Bush aerobics or http://www.00fun.com/bushaero.shtml for the Violink adverse.”