I'm an IDIOT!!!!

“So its saturday night. Some friends have left for college already, others are stuck on family vacations and the remainder are MIA. So I rent a movie to kill the night with.

Once get out of my car I start juggleing my keys. Then I toss them up into the dark night sky. As they fall I catch them and then try throwing them even higher than the time before...

---------side note--we can all see where this is going right?

....I get the thought that I may miss the keys and they may hit my car, resulting in scraches. Being bored, and an idiot I toss them up once more only to have them land on..................the suspence is building................................................land on..................land on top of an extreamly thick bush. I spent about 20 minutes beating/stabing the bush with a broom to find my keys. That doesn't work. Then I take the wose and put it on full blast with hopes that if the pressure doesn't nock them down the plant will become heavey and the keys may fall by them selves.

THis is one thick bush, like 6ft tall and 4 ft wide, and THICK. I probed this thing like __ _ _ _ _ _ _ and nothing worked.

I have a spare to the house, which gott me back inside. But I'll need those car keys.

I try again tomorrow.

----I'm an idiot.”

“The first step is admitting you have a problem! Where is you Tikka? Go back out there right now and finish the job!

Oh yeah good luck!”

“Everyone has their moments!

(some more than others, <G>)”

“It's okay, man. Every man ends up losing something because of bush some time in his life.”

“"THis is one thick bush, like 6ft tall and 4 ft wide, and THICK. I probed this thing like __ _ _ _ _ _ _ and nothing worked.........."


Ok....anybody else gotta a problem with this statment!?!?!”

“After you....”

“Don't feel too bad Tea, my son is on the freeway with a flat tire, no spare and no jack. Calling AAA . Having had a couple of beers, my wife has gone to get him.

Only this afternoon I told him not to use that car till he got the spare fixed. ”

“Not that WE ever did anything like that, LOL...”

“yep, Tilt, you've got me there. You should have seen me the night I high-centered the Karman Ghia. I was only raining an inch an hour when I tried to take a short cut across an abandoned parking lot and that puddle looked the same level as the rest of the lot.

Then, another time, my brother's girl friend tried to start the Super Fury with the Ghia key and broke it off. He also took out 15 trees at a nursery once.

It was my sister who ran the car into the end of the garage.”

“"It was raining" No hallucinogens.”

“riiiiiiiiiiiiiight.

One of the funniest things I ever saw was a guy cutting donuts in an icy parking lot and things went horribly horribly wrong. You have to understand, we just don't get ice down here...

So anyway, the guy is spinning around in his VW Bug, hits a patch of dry pavement and launches into the side of a Jaguar parked about 50 ft away.

Not Good, <G>


You see, Tea, things could be LOTS worse, LOL”

“Okay, Q. If won't do it, I will.


"HEY... Help me find my car keys and we can DRIVE outta here!"


(something like that? LOL)”

“Maybe he should offer to trim the bush. Cut and cut till he finds them.

My crew is home safe and sound.

I knew a guy in college that was driving a VW with a clutch for the first time. Jumped the curb, traveled 50 yards and ran into the side of the dorm.”

“Personaly, I want to chop the bush in half to get my keys back. But mom won't like that idea when she gets back.”

“It's your mom's?

Maybe you could get a real strong magnet to put on that pole that you are probing with.”

“Go to the beach tomorrow and borrow some old dude's metal detector...”

“The keys probably never made it to the ground, but snagged on a branch.”

“now i know my monitor is on its way to the grave - but what the heck is a

wose???????


:)

Don't sweat it.

Now, go watch SNL!! (is it any good these days?)”

“You water the wawn, warden and the wush with a wose.”

“I can't believe the innuendo you guys are making about his mom's bush. Magnet? pole? probe? sic sick sick”

“Holy #&%!$!! You're all sick”

“Look at the bright side Tea...at least the keys didn't fall into the sewer.”

“So, what movie did you rent, "Dumb and Dumber?"”

“LOL @ Pennsy!!!”

“"Catch me if you can"...Good Movie. But can some one explain why Frank Abignale stripped bottles of there lables. This was never explained.”

“BTW, I found the keys.”

“Ah yes....reminds me of the time Sauron was doing the same thing with my keys and they landed on the roof. Luckily I keep a complete spare set.”

“My suggestion was completely innocent. It was you're dirty, rotten, internet corrupted brains that made it something else.

How'd you find the keys, Mr. Tea?”

“The key to a lot of problems are hung up in a white house Bush.”

“Hey, my brain might be dirty and corrupted but it sure ain't rotten. Sheesh!

Tea - I didn't see the movie, but if that guy was peeling off the labels while drinking, I do that too. It's just a habit. Some people smoke while drinking, I peel off labels.”

“Sandy Dennis was a world class label-peeler in "Who's Afraid Of Virginia Woolf?".”

“I remember getting pretty drunk at my sister's wedding and tossing my new brother-in-law's keys into a shrubbery. We couldn't find them until the next day after they left on the honeymoon.

Boy was I popular!

I'm assuming you were stone cold sober Tea? What a dork!”

“I was sober.”

“Hence the title...”

“I've always heard peeling labels was a sign of sexual frustration. The story goes, if you peel the label off completely intact, you'll get lucky.”

“oedipus tea,

when do YOU head off to college?”