Free the Buddha Bear One!

“Free Buddha Bear now! Restore his liberties! Remove the shackles of restraint that keeps him from enlightening us with his posts!

We want Buddha Bear back!








Unless of course, he was abducted by a busload of strippers, then I guess you can keep him for a while. It should work to mellow him out when he comes back.”

“Donations accepted?”

“FREE THE BEAR!”

“Did soneone say , Free Beer?”

“Yeah, who needs a Free Bear when there's Free Beer?”

“Good point Tom.


I am sure Buddha Bear will be neither surprised nor disappointed if we pursue Free Beer before we worry a bout a Free Bear.”

“You guys are right; we can't mount an effective campaign unless we have beer first!

Free Beer!
Free Beer!
Free Beer!
Free Beer!”

“BRA

Budda Restraining Apparatus”

“Right now buddha has a shaved head and some guy in a campaign hat is centimeters from his face cussing him out, and all buddha can do right now is bite his tongue and say "Sir, yes sir" The ultimate irony.”

“Buddha as a Grunt? Union organizer in Jarhead clothing? Stud with the ladies in a warehouse for young men with shaved heads?”

“I thought he was an Oil-boy for the Swedish Bikini Team.”

“Now that I would believe!”

“Tie Your Mother Down
Words and music by Brian May

Get your party gown and get your pigtail down
And get your heart beatin' baby
Got my timin' right I got my act all tight

It's gotta be tonight
My little school babe
Your momma says you don't
And your daddy says you won't
And I'm boilin' up inside
Ain't no way I'm gonna lose out this time

Tie your mother down
Tie your mother down
Lock your daddy out of doors
I don't need him nosin' around
Tie your mother down
Tie your mother down
Give me all your love tonight

'You're such a dirty louse go get outa my house'
That's all I ever get from your family ties
In fact I don't think I ever heard
A single little civil word from those guys
I don't give a light
I'm gonna make out all right
I've got a sweetheart hand
To put a stop to all that
Snipin' and grousin'

Tie your mother down
Tie your mother down
Take your little brother swimmin'
With a brick that's all right
Tie your mother down
Tie your mother down
Or you ain't no friend of mine

Your momma and your daddy
Gonna plague me till I die
I can't understand it
'Cause I'm a peace lovin' guy
Tie your mother down
Tie your mother down
Get that big big big big big big
Daddy out the door
Tie your mother down yeah
Tie your mother down
Give me all your love tonight
All your love tonight”

“Free beer. Free Bear. Freak Bear. Did somebody mention a busload of strippers?

Oooh! Make me write bad checks!”

“My guess is that Mr. Miyagi tricked him into fixing up his house for free.”

“hey match!!”

“I can just see Buddha doing the "wax on",,"wax off" routine with the strippers.”

“Ew, waxing strippers. That's a lot of body hair!”

“After meeting with the parole officer, and being granted parole by an honest judge..... I'm back. Thanks for the efforts, the helped (lol).”

“How does the ankle bracelet fit? LOL”

“No ankle braclet, thank gawd! It's not like I was dealing drugs, or killing someone, just a simple assult and battery (although I view it as self defense). LOL!”

“Of course, of course...

Anybody we know?”

“Ah, Buddha, I didn't think you were a union heavy...lol!”

“The stupid, no big deal story.....

Last Saturday, i was reading on my front porch when some dudes rolled up in a car and threw a water balloon at one of my elderly neighbors as she was weeding her tree lawn. I saw the whole thing happen, because of the load noise the car made speeding down my normally quiet street. The car was travelling toward my home, and I was extremely pi$$ed at what they did to my neighbor, so I stood up, ran down the steps and made a nice gesture toward the occupants of the car, while trying to memorize the lisence plates. they saw/heard me, put the car in reverse, and all three got out of the car to confront me. All of them were young (I estimated 18-20, and it turns out they were 21, 21, and 23), and acting pretty brash. The ring leader hastily walked right up to me, asking in a crazed voice if I was fronting him. I didn't say a word, I just popped him as hard as I could. The two others immediately jumped me. I don't remember much what happened next. All I know is I took some decent hits, and that I had two very bloddy kids laying on my treelawn with about 5 squad cars in my driveway/ the street. It was an embarrassing situation once I came out of my "fight mentality", and realized what was going on.

The cops took me to jail (and I still can't understand why) and two of the guys pressed charges against me (assult). My buddy who lives across the street and saw the cops arrive, bailed me out that night.

I'm lucky, because these dorks didn't have any guns or any weapons. I could have been hurt pretty bad. I'm also lucky that "I came to" before I seriously injured my assailants.

The whole situation was just plain ole stupid, and a great fabrication on my part.



It sounded more interesting than the real story of girdering up my loins to lead a strike, and begin an intensive workout plan. However, it looks like your thoughts ran wild, so I thought you might like the latter story.

enjoy!”

“The moral of the story, never take anything I say on this board seriously, especially if I'm trolling as Gary Coleman, or if I say anything nice about that facist, wolverine fan, Nigal.”

“lmao. Wanna go on a 17.5 mile hike Saturday? That's gotta fit into an intensive workout plan...”

“Classic!!!! And fit for the TT Quotes thread.”

“I had visions of a kinky 'Misery' style movie with Hooter girls, a vat of tiger balm and bushel of those special stamina pills.

but throwin' down, and being the 1st to do,,,,,dawg, Where the testies swellin that day? Did ya get a elbow in or a nice oblique kick?”

“testies swelling?! ROTHFL!”

“Would that be kinda like in "Johnny Dangerously"?!”

“You let three kids kick your ass in you own front yard???


What a sissy.

Now every skateboarder in town is gonna try and get a piece of you.”

“Good to have ya back, big guy!”

“What is a "tree lawn"?”

“I must admit that as I read that I thought "That can't be true, how'd he put the post on that he wouldn't be back for a while."

Classic BB.”

“Maybe he shoulda started "Got my ass kicked by an old lady on my beer lawn.....LEAVING TT!!!!!”

“he just couldn't keep up with logging in and out with all his trolls lately..and needed an alibi
*throws a water balloon full of warm yellow liquid at him*”

“Tree lawn:

NOUN: Chiefly Upper Northern U.S.

A tree lawn is a small area, often planted with trees and grass, between a street and the sidewalk of that street. Tree lawns are most often found in suburbs.”

“"girdering up your loins" took up that much of your free time? damn, dude!”

“He had to find them first, maybe?”

“ah-HA! mystery solved. ;-)

what is up, Stickman? have a good weekend?”

“Other than I was supposed to do an overnighter down at the Gorge but had to work instead, you mean? Gawd, woman, you sure know how to bring out the pain!!!!




It was alright. SSDD.”

“I luv you guys.”

“I luv you guys.”

“well ain't that a beeyatch!”

“Don't worry, BB.

I will uphold my promise not to disclose you told me you were suffering from a severe case of the the clap and required emergency surgery.




Ooops. I wasn't supposed to say that.”

“Chili, you bastard!




lol!”