Divorce Sucks

“divorce is bad enough by itself, it's even worse when 1 or both people are being immature...i was just thinking the other day how when you were a kid you thought all adults had it together, then when you got older you realized that a lot of them don't and some are even more immature than some kids”

“Ne'er truer words were ever spoken Thrifty....”

“Yeah it will definitely get better. Its been almost two years since mine now. Hard to beleive! I've settled into my new home and i'm happier than I've ever been. It took me a long time to feel normal again. The hardest part was probably the loniless after nine years.

Dating sucked for a while then I just quit and worked on myself. It was when I finally became happy with myself and being alone that I met someone great. I'm taking things slow of course.

I met a wonderful woman with similar interests. Truthfully, I didn't know there were women out there that great. Its scares the holy crap out of me to think about falling in love again, but I'm there without giving it a second thought. i can't help it and that's a new feeling for me.

For 30 years I heard people talk about being so in love with someone that they thought about them all the time and never thought about being with anyone else. I thought they were crazy and never beleived them.

Crap, i'm being all mushy and nobody wants to hear this. Anyway that's how I feel now and I know it could all change tomorrow, or in a week or a year. But I love this new feeling and I'm going to embrace it. I hope it can last forever.”

“my wife's great...i think i'll keep her ;)”

“We use to THINK and maybe still do.
That OUR emotions spring from some ESSENTIAL part of ourselves that is inexplicable to science and medicine....

In recent years researchers have identified naturally occuring substances in the brain responsible for everything from FEAR to SADNESS to ANGER...

Now they've linked two neurohoromones to what is arguably the most pleasurable emotion of all.....

LOVE.

Whether maternal or romantic LOVE seems to stimulate regions of the BRAIN rich in OXYTOCIN and VASOPRESSIN- hormones connected to the cravings for human attachment and REWARD.

perhaps not coincidentally, LOVE simutaneously suppresses areas of the brain associated with SOCIAL ASSESSMENT and JUDGEMENT, suggesting a pharmacological basis for the ancient idea that "LOVE IS BLIND”

“Awww isn't that nice Indiana John! Well the first post was nice, the second is a little creepy in a Marvin Gardens kinda way.
;-D

Well Fritz, I hope everything works out for the best for you, and that you're happy sooner rather than later.”

“indiana John...thanks you manage to take the strange and alluring subject of falling into love and JUST TECHNICALLY BLOW IT ALL TO HECK (LOL)...

The one thing I have noticed is we often build walls to protect ourself from the pain and in reality they end up preventing us for experiencing life.
You have to get back into the game or you end up isolating yourself again.”

“IJ, glad to hear you are inlove!! :) its a wonderful thing.”

“Take heart Fritz, My brother got half of everything and full custody of his 3 little kids (they were twin one year olds and a two and a half year old). It can happen. Best wishes to you.”

“uh huh, i can confirm there are much better people out there, and this time you know the warning signs to look for to spot the scary control freaks ;o)”

“Know yourself, be good to yourself, be true to yourself, have standards, be honest, learn from your mistakes so you don't repeat them, have fun. Then it's amazing how the most breath-taking and perfectly suited person will come your way who you couldn't have even imagined.”

“What Ruby said. It really works! And if you say it won't then you're not ready yet ;)”

“Thanks for the support. Unfortunately the kids and I are going through some real rough times with all of this. Latest crisis - paperwork problem at the courthouse, the custody agreement didn't get entered properly, so she is going back to the previous schedule even though she has clearly agreed in writing to the new one, and for two nights we had even started the new one.

The kids just keep getting jerked around and it breaks my heart.

When we thought this was finally going to be done on March 13, the day after his 13th birthday, one of my sons said with a big smile that it would be like a birthday present. He is still waiting for that present.”

“One of the stranger occurences in a strange life was when my oldest son told me one day, "Pop, be glad you divorced her. She's a control freak!"

Now he loves his mother, indeed, is always there when she needs something. But my point is that the kids will figure it all out, and in the end it could well end up costing her.

But it's still a tragedy regardless of how the settlement goes.

Hang in there Fritz, and take it one day at a time. If you need to talk, click on my screen name to get my email address. Whenever somebody goes through this, they feel alone and isolated. But others of us have gone through it.

BTW, I'm heading out to French Creek tomorrow afternoon for two nights of car camping. If you want to stop by and visit, let me know.”

“Well, at least Cottonsox finally had the integrity to tell me she wanted to move on to something else and didn't plan on me being in her life.

I don't know why it would have been so hard for her to say that going out the door. The last five weeks have been pure hell.”

“Sorry about your news. Good luck with the future.”

“Damn man, I'm so sorry. I hope it can be more clean from here on out for you.”

“Did I miss something? So............not to be heartles but didn't you do a hoax regarding this subject back in April? If this is for real then I apologize and my heart goes out to both of you.”

“I am feeling like a real bastard on the hoax thing.”

“I am feeling like a real dumbass on the non hoax part.”

“Well I'm kind of feeling like a dumbass for bringing it up. Can I get you a drink?”

“Sorry to hear your news Chili.”

“Sorry, chili. Life sucks, you get divorced... but one day it will all turn around and be good again.”

“would it make you feel better if we start a cottonsox sux thread?

dude, youre a really great guy. i hate like hell that this is happening to you.
last edited: 8/26/06 6:46:45 AM”

“Sux chili.....but I know it will work out.”

“Sounds like it's Chili Time! Do stuff for your self man. Backpacking twice monthly. Have a few beers in your underwear. Eat Chef Boyardy Raviolis every night. I guess what I'm saying is, maybe try to embrace your new independance.”

“Hugs.....
...truely sorry to hear it....

...why are relationships so hard????....

...let us know when you are in our area again...”

“Sounds like it's Chili Time! Do stuff for your self man. Backpacking twice monthly. Have a few beers in your underwear. Eat Chef Boyardy Raviolis every night. I guess what I'm saying is, maybe try to embrace your new independance.�Nigal
8:00:13 AM
8/26/06

Strip Clubs and "massages"!”

“:-(”

“I feel for ya dude. Been there. The first two years are the worst, but hang in there. I don't know if you believe in all the "self help" crap that is out there, but the only one I have ever read was Divorce & New Beginnings. Check it out. It was truely helpfull, and I found mine on e-bay, for just a couple bucks. It must be onto something because I gave my copy to another newly single dad, and he said it seemed to be right on the money for him too. Well, go easy on the bottle, get plenty of sleep, and suround yourself with friends who are willing to listen. Remember, just hang in there, it WILL get better.”

“I didn't experience a bad 2 years. Maybe 5 minutes and then it was pretty much relief. The difference may have been in the decision being mine and ending up with the kids, but we all grieve differently. In my case I did it while in the marriage, so once the decision was made, it started getting rapidly better. The best to you no matter what your path...”

“Oh, I've got the kids, and everything but her clothes too! But mine was rather unexpected. See she was a cheating whore, and I blindly trusted her till she came home one night and told me. Then I threw her out.”

“At times I think I will make it right though this.

Other times, I want to quit.

I guess it seems like a 3000 foot pull over 5 miles. At times the trailhead looks closer than the shelter.”

“See she was a cheating whore, Gee, tell us what you really think! : )

Chili, I think you will be fine, it takes time as do all good things. You are lucky to have so many people who care about you.”

“Yeah, I just have my down moments.

I will pull through in the long run. Thanks to all.”

“chili if you need anything we are here for you! i'm sorry you are going through this.”

“just think, your mental pack might be heavier for awhile..but your actual pack will be 40 pounds lighter.

We'll see you soon in your neck of the woods..chin up”

“chili, while i've not said anything about my situation in the last 2 years, i know your pain. write me if you need someone to vent/talk to. i'll be happy to give you my cell and we can chat. hell, i'm in richmond and will drive to knoxville for the weekend to hike and chat with you. my email is in my profile. it may do me as much good as you.

peace to you bro. my heart knows your pain.”

“Well, it's good to see that Opie is looking on the brighter side of things !!

Hang in there Chili...”

“no cotton to sort.”

“Thanks, baume.”

“New at this wanted to know if anyone was going through a california divorce uncontested and how long did it take to get one?”

“UM...this (believe it or not) is a backpacking site...you may want to go to Dr.Phil or something.....”

“Just stay married and miserable..it is cheaper!”

“California? man I wish I could help...but all I have ever studied is United States Law.”

“You mean southern law?”

“LOL...actually I am quoting a Federal Judge years ago in Texas who was given a decision from a California Court...he looked at it and replied.

"Interesting, but in this court we only deal with US law. California is not a real source of reference to me."”

“i think reality is not a real source of reference to you.

lol”

““LOL...actually I am quoting a Federal Judge years ago in Texas who was given a decision from a California Court...he looked at it and replied.

"Interesting, but in this court we only deal with US law. California is not a real source of reference to me."”
XL400236
11:17:19 AM
11/30/06

Careful. The paper that decision was writen on is known to cause cancer in California as well.”

“LOL”