Divorce Sucks

“divinity, I gotta meet you honey. ;)”

“Hmmm...methinks I hear the bunny pot a-boiling...”

“I went thru a divorce several years ago. It does suck, there is nothing good about it. We basically had a business arrangement, there were 5 children involved. Change was the hardest thing. The insecurity. Maybe it was the sense of betrayal that was hardest actually (she met someone at work). In any case, it was absolutely brutal. She had a guilty conscience and basically gave me everything, the house, the kids, the furniture, etc... All that did not ease the pain. Time did a good job on that. Hiking did also. You ought to check out how many miles you'll be able to do, or how heavy a pack you'll be able to carry. Keep active, very active, and give it time.

Later I thanked her (sincerely) for divorcing me. Life was much better for me, and I hoped it was for her also.

Life goes on and I met a truly wonderful lady... and it wasn't long... and we are still writing history!!!

Sorry no horror stories. While it was very rough, the outcome was far better than my previous situation.”

“Divorce is great, best thing that happpen in that marriage. Its kinda expensive, but it is worth it.”

“Ewker,
Sorry to hear about the divorce. I have never been through one, I have been married to a great woman for nearly 20 years. I know you will get over it and make things better. As far as needing someone for a referance on some of the trips you have been on, feel free to use my name. I hiked with some folks from this board once by myself. I saw that this bunch was a great bunch of folks to hike with so I carried my 10 year old son on the next one. If you need anyone to vouch for you on these trips please let me know. My son ,now 11, was impressed with the people he meet on that trip with you. He couldn't believe that people could meet over the internet and be such great friends. He would be glad to send a letter stating that nothing goes on other than a bunch of friends getting together for a great time hiking.

Best of Luck,

BAMA”

“Best $625 I ever spent in my life!!

Life is GREAT once you are free & clear of them! Nothing worse than being with someone you can't stand.”

“I've been divorced for almost 3 yrs. It's not pretty but it's not the end of the world either. It's not the way you wanted it to be but somehow, here you are. Everyone has their own circumstance. Have faith in yourself. Take your time and do what's best for you and your kids.

You'll eventually recover and love women again. I know I do.:) Just take your time and know that you have alot of support from us divorced brothers. It's a very sad thing that happens sometimes in your life but don't let it knock you down for good! Use this life lesson to make you a better person and partner. That's what I did.:) If you need to talk about ANYTHING, don't hesitate to confide in a fellow divorcee. GOOD LUCK, BRO!!!”

“Ewker...also show the judge your tent (solitude) and tell them there is no way you were using your hiking trips to double up...”

“Opie...good point. well, If I remember correctly...there was a time at TC2, when I saw Ewker walking off immediately after and following Tarabull....hmmmmmmmm. I was really drunk at the time, and I don't remember much else...


Joking dude!!!”

“It is NashVegas not Nasberg!!! Just remember Ewker..It could be a lot worse. How about you are in Tapei,Tiawan on a buying trip, married for 8 years, thought you had good marriage, call home and SHE says: "When you get home I won't be there." HELLO--WhAT?" Not at time, but with time................................best damn thing that ever happened to me. By the way, I won't tell the lawyer you tried to hit on me at Red River Gorge. I promise.....”

“come play on CMB's Mammoth Cave hike trip, its in like 3 weeks or something like that. I;ll even let you hit up on me or Khatru...LOL”

“Sorry to hear that Ewker, and Newgirl too. Big bummer. All the advice is good-exercise, watch the alcohol, get out doing things you enjoy, don't make any real big decision, take care of yourself, etc. etc. Time is the thing, a year will make a big difference. Read some self help books, talk to a few friends about it. The absolute last thing to do is jump into another relationship, the first couple you do get into are going to be "theraputic" at best.

That'll be $.25”

“I'm no marriage counselor by any means, but I run into people going through divorce all the time. Unfortunately it's usually not until it gets violent that I meet them. Don't spend a whole lot of time alone. You may not want to talk about it to other people, but at least be around other people even if it's just watching tv or going to the store or whatever. The more you're alone, the more you'll dwell on it and either wonder what you did wrong or get mad at the other party, neither of which is helpful.
I dread getting divorced, because I know it will be due to my wandering eyes and tendency to talk to strangers.”

“Thanks, to all who have responded to this. I have enjoyed reading it and I know I will be better off but at this time I can't seem to see that far in advance.

Its funny (not really) how your mind is racing with thoughts about everything going on around you and your life.

Stikmon, thanks for the offer on the Mammoth Cave trip but I do have one planned for that weekend that I have been looking forward to for months.

Thank you to everyone who has offered to help, I really appreciate it and oneday I may take you up on it.”

“Divorce does suck. If it can be avoided, I rec that you do. Kids get scarred no matter how careful you are and it hurts like hell IMHO. Hopefully those around you that care will give you some much needed attention to help you get through it. But, after the dust settles things will get better. The freedom is nice, but at a price.”

“Ewker, you can make it. Concentrate on family and friends and most of all...guard your heart! Thats the mistake I made, out of the frying pan, into the fire. Try not to let the pain and loneliness mess with your head, it will get better. My prayers are with you.

...and yes, guys...I am a lurker!”

“is this the same Ina that was at TC2”

“yep...that would be me.”

“I smell romance.”

“stikmon???”

“That's what you get for sharing your tent! LOL.

It's not over yet, old buddy. At 71 and after 30 years I am now in touch with "My Old Flame!" Story will be forthcoming. Life gets better and better.

BTW, tell them it is none of their business as to with whom you backpack.”

“I wish I could tell them it is nowslimmer, I wish I could tell them it is none of there business but I have to list the people along with some info. That other info will be the easy part because what there wanting to know I don't know.

Good for you on finding "Your Old Flame" hope it works out for you.

Ina, you shouldn't be a lurker. You met quite a few people from TT at TC2 just jump on in.
How have you been?”

“As you can see, theres been no lurking for me in a few days. Sorry for a slow response, but everythings great. Still up in the air about Tc3. Hope to get there! Should know in a couple of days. How bout you?”

“I am not going to make this one. I have plans for another trip that I have been looking forward to for many months. It will be so good to get away for 4 days..woohoo”

“I said I was drunk at the time.”

“stikmon..which time was that :)”

“I have Monday off Tc3 weekend so its gonna suck if things don\'t work out for me to go.”

“Ina, I remember you had to leave TC2 in a hurry, hope there was nothing serious going on. I ask TD about it later on and he never said.”

“Actually, that had something to do with the...out of the frying pan, etc...None of that this year, though. If I go, I\'ll be there all weekend.”

“sorry, I will miss you this yr and I am sure chili will to..oh wait he is married now..no playing around the horns...lol”

“Ah, yes...the horns...very interesting.
Congratulations to chili, where ever he may roam.
Ewker, hope you have a good weekend.”

“Nothing like spending this past weekend stuck indoors filling out the Interrogatoriers from the spouse's lawyer.

The information you have to provide is just amazing and a waste of time. You basically have to do the work for them against yourself....grrrr”

“Did I ever tell you the story about the guy who walks up and punches his best friend in the face?

The friend picks himself up, runs his hand over his face, and says, "Now why'd you go and do that? I'm your best friend. Why, I even kept you from shooting your wife!"

The guy replies, "Yeah, and if it hadn't been for you, I'd be getting out right about now!"”

“I know the end results will be worth it but it is just getting there that is aggravating.”

“Hang in there Ewk. This, too, shall pass.”

“A woman wakes up and her husband is out of the bed. After a few moments she hears uncontrollable sobbing coming from the basement.

Upon going downstairs, she finds her husband, head in hands, crying uncontrollably.

She inquires: "What is wrong with you?"

The man answers: "Do you remember just before we got married and I got in trouble,,and the judge told me unless I married you I would do 20 years in prison?"

"Yes", replied the wife.

"Well", the man continued, while sobbing, "I would have got out today".”

“awwww.....Ewker...hang in there.......and yes divorce sucks.......but I don't have to live with that tyrant any more......wooohoooooo..I would rather live in a garage than live with him....oh wait..I do live in a garage!!!”

“Good luck, Ewker, and hang in there. I lived thorugh a really ugly one in 1991-2, but things get better. Trust Unca' Gremlin.

Doug”

“I did get some good news which made me feel better.”

“And that would be...?

You're not gonna pull and Artex on us, are you?”

“Chief, just in case someone is monitoring this site I had rather not say but it is less work/headaches (for now) that I was going to have to do”

“pretty soon you'll be hiking with Khatru again, and I'll even let you smell his stinky butt.”

“"Hang in there Ewk. This, too, shall pass."
~Geobeet

Uh... when?
I went through a divorce 18 years ago, and haven't as much as gotten pre-pre-pre engaged since.

I wouldn't trade a thousand years of marital bliss for one second the heartache I experienced waaaaay back then...”

“I look at it this way. After my second divorce, I am single and she's still a jerk. I've learned to be happy with me, and I would not trade that for all the world.”

“I take it this is a contested divorce? No way you two could have played nice and gone uncontested?

Hang in there - I used to work for a lawyer that handled matrimonial cases and some of them were very nasty.

That's all the sympathy you're getting from me - 'cause it takes two.....”

“Twink: It also takes two to come to an agreement.

I reached a mediated agreement with my ex-, we paid for a professional mediator to work out a fair settlement - and then for the next two years, she and her lawyer kept thinking of things she should fight (and stalling on the court date).”

“Anyway Ewker - you've got my sympathies... there is no way your life isn't getting torn apart.

While I think my ex- was unfair, I know it was hard on her too. It ain't easy for anyone.”

“Then she was a bitter biotch.

Divorce sucks. Dating sucks. No word on marriage? What the hell are we supposed to be doing? LOL

It takes two - that's all I said - not good not bad.”

“I wouldn't wish divorce on my worst enemy. It does suck, but it's worth it in the end. :)”

“Welcome to the unwavering freedom of bachelorhood. You may not think so right now, but you're gonna eventually like it!

Good luck Ed!”