Newgirl Burns Out, Heads To Vegas

“Well, I'm ashamed to say it, but I had to withdraw from classes last wk. I finally "hit the wall." Forty+ hrs. of work a wk. at night, school, raising Newergirl alone, and everything falling apart w/ her dad just crashed in on me. I wasn't failing yet, but something had to give and school was on the losing end. I was looking at failing by the end of the semester. I've been a 4.0 student up to now, so this is a big blow. Very, very hard to admit that I couldn't pull it off this go round. Very depressing financially as well. I'm too late in the semester for refunds, so all the money was wasted, plus Uncle Sam wants his free money (grants) paid back from this semester before I can return to school. I fully understand that, it just bites. Anyway, I was having alot of back pain last Mon., and started running a fever, went to the doc. and found out that I have a kidney infection. I made the decision right there and went up to the school and did a complete withdraw on Tues. I cried through the whole process.

On Wed. Newergirl left w/ her Grandma for Denver and on Fri. I hit the road for Vegas!!! LOL! I really did go to Vegas, but not to escape life. My little sis got married at Caesar's Palace on Sun. afternoon. It was a good little "vacation" though. A few days on the road and in Sin City clears a chic's head. Oooooh, I saw Michael Jackson too. I was drinking at one of the bars in Caesar's and he and his peeps walked right by on their way to the shopping area. He's nasty, if any of you were wondering. The other highlights: I ate some really good mushroom meatloaf and got hit on at an oxygen bar.

Back to reality today . . . your prayers are appreciated. I have to go before the financial aid appeals board and prove I had unusual circumstances this semester. If they agree, I can get aid in the future, if not . . . I'm done.”

“Hey Newgie - good luck with that - just explain your circumstances - I think they'll accept those. Fingers crossed for ya :o)”

“Well Heck.

Sorry to hear that, NG, but it's pretty much standard stuff here in the real world... 'Two steps forward, one step back'...

Get your batteries recharged and hit 'em again later! <G>”

“I hope everything works out for you and the rest of you problems fad away.


8)”

“Damn, Newgirl, damn!

You are a strong person who will land back on your feet!”

“Good luck to you. I took a year off from grad school and it was wonderful. I hurried to grad with my BS in 4 years while working and putting myself through school. My wife and I got married and I immediately started on a Masters. I was trying to hurry and get out in 18 months while working 40 hrs and just burned out. We both took 1 year off and were the better for it. The major differences are 1) no kids which I fully appreciate now and 2)didn't have to pay the government back since we limped to the end of a semester. Just wanted to let you know others have been there.

Good luck. Now that we have kids we always comment that we are amazed at how single moms do it. Keep up the good work.”

“hugs........it just gets so hard sometimes......I know......hang in there...and keep people who love you close by.......”

“As you know, advanced education is a blessing in todays world. May the best of luck follow you always. I was 49 when I finally finished school!!! So, if you can finish up as much as you can in your younger years, you will be much better off.
Just keep hammering away at Uncle Sam's heart strings (and pocket book). And try to maintain that 4.0 average when you get back into it!!!

Happy Trails !!!”

“Thanks guys. Mostly . . . thanks for listening to my drama. It's good to have a bunch of not-so-involved people to talk to about it. I'm trying hard and some day soon, my life will be on an even path again.”

“Sorry to hear that but, in the long run it will make you a stronger person. Trust me I have been in the same situation before. It gets better just hang on.”

“You can get back on your feet. Take a few deep breaths and focus on your goals. And don't wallow in bad breaks longer than you have to. Think positive. Good luck to you...”

“I remember in school I'd be stressed and my mom would have some comment about just wait til you're in the real world. I would always think, I'm married, working 40 hrs, and taking 3 graduate courses...I'm in the real world. I'll be glad when I'm out of school and can slow down.

Have fun while you can. If yall are still having good weather up there maybe you can spend some of the weekend time you'd have been studying and take a hike or picnic with your daugher. Times like that are priceless and are so memorable for the little amount of time they take.”

“That's the other thing, Dayhiker, I don't want Newergirl paying the price for me to get a degree. I try to arrange things as carefully as possible, so that I can provide for her and still be there for her, but w/ that load it is hard to do a good job of parenting. When the doc. told me I had a kidney infection, I just thought immediately, "I have nothing to give her but myself and this pace is breaking me down." She is the top of the list, even if that means I quit school for awhile.”

“Hey Newgie - Sorry to hear about the school not working out this time. Don't worry, you'll get another shot at it. We'll be thinking of you......... Hodge”

“Dang girl. I'm sorry you had to make that decision. I hope that it all works out for you - as I'm sure it will - and you'll be back in school before you know it! One day Newergirl will brag with her girlfriends about how much she admires her Mom who raised her on her own, went to school and got her degree, and then kicked butt in the job market.

It'll get better.....(just think, at least its not the sewage situation again :)”

“You guys can tell me if this is a little bit immature too, but it kinda' sucked to go to my little sister's wedding. I'm geniunely happy for her, but at this moment in my life, it just bites. I am the oldest in my family on both sides, and now all of them are married or engaged (except my 18 yr. old bro). It sucked. I got totally drunk on Sat. night. (which is also lame of me, but hey . . . you got cope somehow)”

“And no worries . . . I rarely drink. (I can just see all the comments about that! LOL!)”

“You're just waiting for someone with all of his teeth?”

“I don't think marriage is the answer to all my woes, but . . . you all know what I'm saying here right?!”

“Sometimes you gotta let your hair down. You're out of town with childcare taken care of, why not cut loose a litte? You didn't wind up with anything pierced or a tattoo anywhere did you?”

“Chin up, newgirl. Everything will work out okay.

I don't think it was immature to get bummed about your little sis getting married. I was bummed a little at my younger brother's wedding. Of course, that's where I met my wife, but that's another story.

And getting blitzed is okay too. Doesn't seem like a regular thing for you and you obviously needed to let off some steam.

So tell us more about getting hit on. Was I he totally lame, or were you just not interested?”

“Wow! Sorry to hear that Newgirl. The Las Vegas trip is a nice touch, though.
Maybe we can get you out to Pug's when Bowlderman (the Tt'er formerly known as martyb) visits and cheer you up a bit.
I'll buy!”

“No Newgirl, that's normal. LOL
You'll just have to leave newergirl's dad behind.
Plenty of good guys left out there for you to meet.
Your time is coming. :)”

“I think she's saying she wants an MRS degree. Just kidding. You're saying that you're watching folks you grew up with doing things that you perceive as "passing" you. There's nothing wrong with feeling that way. You're experienced enough to know not to act on those thoughts/fears just for the sake of "fitting the norm".”

“Yah, when you're in school, a lot of times you feel like life's passing you by, especially when you're older than the "traditional" students. I know I felt that way, like my life was on hold for 12 years. But it's worth it, so stick with it.”

“Well, I was looking pretty good on Sun. afternoon (for the wedding and all), but I was feeling pretty nasty (due to Sat. night's over indulgence). Soooo, I heard that going to an oxygen bar clears that up, so I head to one before I went to my sis's rm. to help her get ready. I was sitting there, w/ an O2 tube up my nose and a reasonably cute guy told me I was "the best looking girl he'd ever seen w/ a tube up her nose." It was cute and I laughed and said thank you and hauled ass to my sis's rm. I'm totally unable to handle "the scene" right now. I have no mojo. Anyway, it made me feel like I was hot for about an hr. LOL!”

“Thanks Aero! I'm up for it. Did you get my e-mail?”

“Arrgh! Sorry to hear about your woes, newgie!! Hope you don't feel inadequate in any way about having to (temporarily) drop out of school. I know lots of very happy and very successful people who did the same for various reasons before getting their degree. I bet you will ultimately find that a "taking a break" from school will refresh you, recharge your batteries, etc. Plus, I'll buy you a beer at Pug's in a week or so if that'll help! If not, we could always exchange bizarre northeastern Montana family stories - that'll cheer anybody up....”

“Thanks Bowlderman, looking forward to meeting you.”

“Bloodpusher, I hope you aren't planing to head out to the local O2 bar. LOL!”

“Been there, done that, but couldn't afford the T-shirt. It hurts, but you'll get up and back at it. Hey it took me ten years to get my degree and I went days! Everybody laughs at that, but there was 5 yrs at the 'phone co., a year as a reporter at the rag, garbage man, labourer. A year of work and a year for my Teaching Diploma and I was 29 when I started my career. I'm living proof that it can be done.

My former girlfriend is 25, with a 5 year old daughter. She's just been hired at the school in the neighbouring village and will do her last training period (unpaid, of course), supervised by a retired teacher (with whom I also went out for a year - I could not make this up - But I digress). At Christmas she will be back full time. She's had a harder life than I, but I'll say it again, you can do it too.

Never give up and come back fighting when you can.

God bless you,

Doug”

“lol, no not me.

I don't even think we have an O₂ bar in Huntsville...”

“You just experienced the most common problem I see at the university...trying to do too much. It catches up with you eventually, such as when you have an illness or a personal problem.

Rule of thumb for the future: (Number of hours of work/week) + (Number of units x 4) < 60

That leaves you enough time to have a balanced life.

In 1985 I had three children, was teaching a full load (4 classes) and taking two graduate level mathematical statistics classes. I flamed out during the second year. By cutting back to one class I was able to get good grades and have a much more balanced lifestyle. It added one year to my degree program...but was worth it.”

“"...best looking girl with a tube up her nose." Hmmm haven't tried that one before. Maybe he was a doctor! I saw some of those O2 things at that Sports Bar on Broadwater. Looked pretty funky; they had different colors of fluid it perked through!

I got the email, thanks for the update. I hope everything's going OK otherwise and that Newergirl is doing well.

Are you still at the same place in town?”

“I dunno, waerowolf, maybe we should forget about Pug's and go for that sports bar. I'll bring the camera, and we'll charge 10 bucks for any TTer who wants a photo of Newgirl with a tube up her nose.”

“Newgirl, prayers have been said, and more will be on the way!”

“I;d offer u advise, but I have none for this situation.

I wish u good luck”

“Tea, words of advice for YOU! Next time you're bummin', don't floor the pedal...



















JUST GO TO VEGAS!!!”

“And for you, newgirl, relax and enjoy a break from being 'supermom,' 'super student,' 'super worker,' etc.

Things will work out. They always do. I recall when I used to think life just naturally provided you with the white picket fence, cute little house, great job, fab SO, etc. hahahahahaha... Life is full of challenges. So, too, will you move on.

Nada worries. Take it easy for now. :-)”

“Sorry to hear you had to quit your classes, newgirl. This too shall pass. Hang in there, kiddo.”

“Hugs.

I have NO doubt you will get through all of this. Hang in there and focus on the peace of mind you have, knowing that your priorites are right and you are making the right choices.”

“Aero, the different colors are for aromatherapy. I am still living at the same place and Newergirl is great. Thanks for all the advice, good wishes, prayers, . . . I need them. Well, off to work I go.”

“Sorry about your semester and your illness.... get better soon NG. Some real challenges came your way this year NG.”

“You can not take more off the table than what you place upon it. Yo Newgirl, I still luv ya!”

“Geeze, sounds like what I tell my daughter. You can go 120 mph only so long, sooner or later we find our limits, and something in our lives will give-physical health, mental health, relationships, motivation, something.

Don't sweat it, rest up, make some adjustments, and come back at it at a pace that allows you to live your life and tand to your daughter.

Good luck, I suspect you will do fine.”

“I know you'll pull through the tough Newgie, but please, take it easy! Kidney infections are difficult to fight and often (been there) land you in the hospital. Please take it easy and do as little as possible! You really do need to just lie around and relax. It's the best thing for you.”

“Newgirl. It happens don't worry you have everything in track right now believe it or not. I have faith in ya.”

“ng, im sorry things didnt work out. tilts right. one step back, two forward. 2 years from now, this will seem like a minor bump in the road.

now, wtf is an oxygen bar?!?”

“Enough lollygagging, you slacker!
You best be back at that school signing up for classes for next semester, if'n you know what good for you.

Dang kids!


Hope that brought a smile to your face.
Enjoy the time off. Then get back in the saddle.”

“I have every confidence that your mojo is just 'on break'.



Ten bucks, eh?

hmmm.”