If I see one more yuppie with a cellphon e.........

“kill myself”

“I hate the idiots with the NexTel Walkie talkies that like for everyone to hear their conversations. Those walkie talkies work in phone mode so you don't have to hear but I guess these people think it's cool for everyone to hear their entire conversation.”

“I guess the people using food stamps and cell phones at the same time are ok?

I have seen them do it.”

“i live just north of carmel, indiana, which is yuppie hell.”

“Give me a few minutes. Let me go to the grocery store with my cell phone and camera. I'll post the photo if you'll keep your promise.”

“youre not worth it”

“I've never seen someone use foodstamps and have a cellphone, but I have seen a big screen TV in a single wide trailer.”

“i mean, it should at least be an honorable death.”

“I try to be unobtrusive on those occasions when I check with the missus if the store is out of what she asked me to pick up on the way home from work. Folks calling from a store doesn't bother me, but talking loud does. Restaurants are a whole nutha story ... oh, and in my classes, it's a half point off the grade if the phone rings in the backpack or purse because it isn't turned off.”

“I am guessing 2poops does not own a phone.”

“i dont know why that gets under my skin, its so irrational. i guess its just the sight of it. im very much of an anti-"keeping up with the jones's" mentality that seeing every other person with one to their ear is quite comical. why, i can remember, years and years and years ago, at one time, my mother would get out a pen and look thru her cabinets. and then she would write down what she needed. she would use her (gasp) memory and (ooooh) ink and paper. and gosh, you know what? that still works for her.”

“what i really wanna know is, how did lewis and clark explore the louisiana purchase without goretex?”

“In my job, I enter ALL KINDS OF HOMES! I have seen the same thing Big Screen Tv's in silver bullet trailer homes, Yukons sitting in driveways, and a few homes where every kid is either on a cell phone or a computer while Dad and Mom write a check for me to turn their gas meter back on. Worst thing is that, in one case, a daughter in her teens came into the kitchen one time and said,"bout time we had hot water"...and the lovely girl was on a cell phone after getting home from school in her own car. I just take the money, bid them good day and carry on to the next family of good fortune. It is amazing what has taken priority in our culture. Don't get me started on the Middle Eastern homes I have been in....infact, don't get me started on Middle Eastern anything...except maybe the food...they got good food.”

“and yea yea im not unaware of the irony of railing against technology as i sit at my computer with its cordless mouse and keyboard. but its like really slow and stuff. yea.and im still dialing up. so there.”

“If I see another hick dragging a cross up a mountain on public land....”

“now if it doubles as an antennae for his wireless phone thats ok”

“2poops - Phones are really pretty cheap these days. Even people with modest incomes can afford one. Check into it Ted.”

“I mean... this is your handiwork, is it?”

“Long live The StormBringer!

what, and cut into my crack addiction? never!”

“"Ted," LMAO!!”

“Hmmm...cell phones are alot cheaper than landlines, and more convenient why wouldn't someone have one.”

“We don't even have a landline in our house. Living with roommates it's a lot easier for everyone to have their own phone. No more arguing over who made the long distance call to Canada.”

“ive been branded a right-wing radical by violynn. i suspect that completes his day also.”

“are you guys going to make out now?”

“its not even about money. thats missing the point. its about being too lazy to check your kitchen cabinets and writing down what you need on a piece of paper. when im in the grocery for 10 minutes and see half a dozen ppl not just with cellphones but ON their phones, thats just silly. its the same ppl who will wait 15 minutes in the drive-thru lane when there is no waiting at the inside counter.”

“and there will be a digital feed direct to your monitor.”

“score!”

“do you have a brother or something that lives up in this part of the state? At first, I thought it was you in Meijer last night . . . scary stuff.

oh yeah . . . what really bugs me is the a-hole on the cell phone driving about 10 mph under the speed limit in front of me.”

“Amen, thats a huge problem around here, I don't have a problem so much with the people that can drive normally while on the phone, I see them they're out there. But a lot of people pick up the phone and hit the brakes.”

“Stormbringer, you could have had yoru chance to kill yourself today if you had gone to the outfitter's while I was there. I got into a small...altercation with my wife via cellphone. Seems when I called her at work to tell her about the money I was going to spend on a new tent, the conversation took a turn for the worse, and I looked up at one point to see several customers and clerks looking wide-eyed in my direction as I told her my opinion of "waiting until your birthday."”

“i dont mean to be so negative to cellphone owners in general. its the ridiculous conspicuous consumption aspect i have a problem with. with so many plans now offering unlimited and rollover minutes, ppl are now calling each other to say that they just farted and it felt good. of course, ive started threads about farting and instant messaged ppl to tell them i just farted, so who am i to talk?”

“Calling people to tell them you farted is old. Nowadays you have to anticipate it and call them and fart into the receiver.”

“Haha Norm, that's why I don't have a wife! She'd be telling me no all the time when I decided to buy some new gear.”

“Gosh, should I say it?? I'm kinda with 2poops on this one. The ONLY time I had any little craving for a cell phone was when my vehicle broke down 11:30 p.m. in the boonies of the Twin Cities. Gosh, guess what? I stayed with the vehicle and a copy came within half an hour and I was outta there. Not bad..

(OK, so if I ever get a cell phone you can slaughter me. LOL!)”

“Well, in her defense Jeremy, she took me from barely paying my bills on time to paying off 2 cars and making a house payment with money left over. I still want the tent though.”

“Speaking of farting, I was in the john at the airport taking a dump and my phone went off. I think to myself, do I answer it? What if the person on the other end asks me what I'm doing. I'd have to tell them, won't I? What if it was girl I had been trying to get to go out with me and she finally called back to accept a date. I don't want to lie to her. That's no way to start a relationship.

Cell phones suck.”

“No joke, I'm in the stall the last week of the term, and the guy in the other stall (the handicapped-accessible one I might add) is talking on his cell phone while he craps. He continues talking as he hoists trou, buckles up (quite the balancing act I imagine), leaves the stall and leaves the bathroom -- too busy talking to wash his hands apparently. Of course, since he was juggling the phone, maybe his hands never were used for anything else in the process....eewwwww.”

“Norm, what the wife don't know won't hurt her. If you want the tent that bad get it and hide it! If you put it with the rest of your gear I doubt she'd ever realize you bought a new tent.

One of my buddies keeps a credit card his wife doesn't know about. He has the bill sent to work. I've been taking good notes like that for years in preperation for when I do get married.”

“The FBI is warning police nationwide to be alert for people carrying
cellphones, cautioning that the popular electronic devices cover
everything from GPS to internet access which could be used for
terrorist planning.

In a bulletin sent Kwaanza Eve to about 18,000 police
organizations, the FBI said terrorists may use cellphones "to assist
with target selection and pre-operational planning."

It urged officers to watch during searches, traffic stops and other
investigations for anyone carrying cellphoness, especially if the cellphones
are used in suspicious ways.

"The practice of researching potential targets is consistent with
known methods of al-Qaida and other terrorist organizations that seek
to maximize the likelihood of operational success through careful
planning," the FBI wrote.

The Associated Press obtained a copy of the bulletin this week and
verified its authenticity.

"For local law enforcement, it's just to help give them one more
piece of information to raise their suspicions," said David Heyman, a
terrorism expert for the Washington-based Center for Strategic and
International Studies. "It helps make sure one more bad guy doesn't
get away from a traffic stop, maybe gives police a little bit more
reason to follow up on this."

The FBI noted that use of cellphones may be innocent, "the
product of legitimate recreational or commercial activities." But it
warned that when combined with suspicious behavior -- such as
apparent surveillance -- a person with a cellphone "may point to
possible terrorist planning."

The manufacturer of ATT Wireless said Monday terrorists
would probably find almanacs more useful than the
collection of cell phones they offer.

"While we doubt that our cell phones would be of particular
interest to people who would wish to do us harm, we will certainly
cooperate to the fullest with national authorities at any level they
deem appropriate," publisher John Pierce said.

The FBI said uses typically found for cellphones that could be
useful for terrorists includes profiles of cities and states, scheduling, synchronizing of attacks on waterways, bridges, dams, reservoirs, tunnels,
buildings and landmarks. It said this wireless information is often
accompanied by photographs and maps.

The FBI urged police to report such discoveries to the local U.S.
Joint Terrorism Task Force.”

“One of my buddies keeps a credit card his wife doesn't know about. He has the bill sent to work.
Dub
10:30:32 PM
12/29/03

Kids, don't try this at home. Take it from me, it won't last forever! Getting caught is inevitable. Don't ask me how I know.”

“Alaska/USA, are you paid to be such an idiot?”

“You could always say you kept the card so you could buy her nice gifts without her knowing the cost...then point to some jewelry she has.”

“The FBI is warning police nationwide to be alert for people carrying
credit cards, cautioning that the popular payment option covers
everything from VISA to American Express which could be used for
terrorist planning.

In a bulletin sent Christmas Day to about 18,000 police
organizations, the FBI said terrorists may use credit cards "to assist
with Target Store shopping and pre-operational planning."

It urged officers to watch during searches, traffic stops and other
investigations for anyone carrying credit cards, especially if the credit cards
are used in suspicious ways.

"The practice of researching potential targets is consistent with
known methods of al-Qaida and other terrorist organizations that seek
to maximize the likelihood of operational success through careful
planning," the FBI wrote.

The Associated Press obtained a copy of the bulletin this week and
verified its authenticity.

"For local law enforcement, it's just to help give them one more
piece of information to raise their suspicions," said David Heyman, a
terrorism expert for the Washington-based Center for Strategic and
International Studies. "It helps make sure one more bad guy doesn't
get away from a traffic stop, maybe gives police a little bit more
reason to follow up on this."

The FBI noted that use of credit cards may be innocent, "the
product of legitimate recreational or commercial activities." But it
warned that when combined with suspicious behavior -- such as
shopping online -- a person with a credit card "may point to
possible terrorist planning."

The credit service giant MasterCard said Monday terrorists
would probably find cell phones more useful than the
collection of credit cards they offer.

"While we doubt that our credit cards would be of particular
interest to people who would wish to do us harm, we will certainly
cooperate to the fullest with national authorities at any level they
deem appropriate," publisher John Pierce said.

The FBI said uses typically found for credit cards that could be
useful for terrorists includes purchasing almanacs with profiles of cities and states, purchasing cell phones and calling plans, purchasing watches to be used for synchronizing attacks on waterways, bridges, dams, reservoirs, tunnels,
buildings and landmarks. It said credit card information is often
accompanied by photographs and signatures useful for stealing someone's identity, thereby making the terrorist indistinguishable from the common worker .

The FBI urged police to report such discoveries to the local U.S.
Joint Terrorism Task Force."”

“I admit that I love my cell phone and at times I don't know what I would do without it but there is a time and a place to talk on your phone. It drives me crazy at work when I'll have a patient sit down at my desk talking on their cell phone. I used to sit and wait for them to get off but now I just interrupt their conversation and do my job. I mean come on they can wait 5 more minutes because once they leave my desk they are out the door, but no they have to call everyone they know as soon as they walk out of the room with the doctor, so they can tell them what is wrong with them.”

“my cell phone saves my butt AND gets me into trouble....every single month”

“I like my cell phone. It started when I chose to hike alone,as it was the only way I could get the "boss" to let me hike alone unchallenged (especially in winter) My desires were often bigger than my time frame allowed. A bag (3 watt) cell/sat phone allowed me to clear my extra time/days with the powers-that-be from the peaks. I try to go outside or some vacant area to use it whenever possible & do not/cannot talk in public. I'm also issued one by the state. For all their annoyances, they probably save lives.”

“Wow, 2poops didn't seem to have any problem with cells when Verison was paying his bills...

I find it funny that the single most maditory thing that people HAVE to have is...cable. They will stand in line at the food banks before they use the money for the cable bill to buy food.”

“Bread...circuses...bread...circuses...”

“I don't have cable. Haven't for 5 years. I'd spend more time than I already do just sitting on my a$$.

I do have a cell phone, which I got because it was cheaper than the land line I had. I do use my "ignore" button on my phone when it rings and I'm talking to someone else, or at the store, or whatever. Or, I just turn the ringer off. Voice mail is there for a reason!”

“"Wow, 2poops didn't seem to have any problem with cells when Verison was paying his bills..."

i never worked for the wireless division, they never paid for my cell phone because i didnt have a cell phone thru them or anyone else.

but its been awhile since nigal poo-pooed anything i said, so i guess hes overdue. but, please, dont make up stuff.”