Seinfold Quotes

“Last night I saw a Seinfeld I hadn't seen in a while and there was a quote I didn't recall.

Jerry is describing his girlfriends roomate to George,

"...and she had all of the features that are preferred by the superficial male."

--Jerry Seinfeld”

“I'm Out!

- Kramer”

“"Step off!"
-George imitating his climbing/sports minded friend, whose death he eventually causes”

“Here's my favorite site:

http://www.pkmeco.com/seinfeld/

And remeber, only 12 months until season one comes out on DVD!”

“giddy-up”

“"You can't remember my name can you."”

“Mulva?”

“"Schmoopy!"”

“"FLIP YOUR DOG'S EAR OVER!!!"”

“happy pappy”

““Now that’s one magic loogie.””

“HELLooooooooooooo! LALALA!”

“"Um, excuse me, I - I think you forgot my bread."
"Bread, two dollars extra."
"Two dollars? But everyone in front of me got free bread."
"You want bread?"
"Yes, please."
"Three dollars!"
"What?"
"No soup for you!"”

“Why do they call it Ovaltine? The glass is round. The can is round. They should call it Roundtine.”

“"It's Fusilli Jerry! It's made from fusilli pasta. See the microphone?"
"When did you do this?"
"In my spare time. You know, I'm working on one of you George. I'm using ravioli. See, the hard part is to find a pasta that captures the individual."
"Why fusilli?"
"Because you're silly. Get it?"”

“"She had man-hands!"
"Would you prefer it if she had no hands at all?"
"Would she have hooks?"
"Do hooks make it more attractive, Jerry?"
"Kinda cool looking."”

“Are you master of your domain?”

“YES, YOU STINK! YOU'RE BEYOND STINK!”

“"I can't face the bubble boy."
- George”

“"So I started to walk into the water. I won't lie to you boys, I was terrified. But I pressed on, and as I made my way past the breakers a strange calm came over me. I don't know if it was divine intervention or the kinship of all living things, but I tell you Jerry, at that moment I was a marine biologist."”

“"He's not sponge-worthy."”

“"It's Goretex. You know about Goretex?"
"You like saying 'Goretex', don't you?"
- George, showing off his new coat”

“"Listen to this. Marcy comes over and she tells me that her ex-boyfriend was over late last night and 'yada yada yada I'm really tired today.' You don't think she'd yada yada sex?"

"I've yada yada'd sex."

"Really?"

"Yeah. I met this lawyer, we went out to dinner, I had the lobster bisque, we went back to my place, yada yada yada, I never heard from him again."

"But you yada yada'd over the best part."

"No, I mentioned the bisque."”

“If that van's a rockin', don't come a knockin'!”

“KRAMER: Oh...yeah. I got my new plates. But they mixed them up.
Somebody got mine and I got their vanity plates.
GEORGE: What do they say?
KRAMER: Assman.
JERRY: Assman?
KRAMER: Yeah. Assman, Jerry. I'm Cosmo Kramer, the Assman!”

“"Jerry, I just saw a pigman, a PIGMAN!!"”

“...I got it from riding a tractor.”

“LOL @ Aero...one of my fav's !”

“The dingo ite yer byebee.”

“"STELLLLLLLLLAAAAAAAAA!"”

“George didn't kill Tony the rock climber, he just messed up his face and Elaine didn't like it. Tony was Elaine's "mimbo". male-bimbo.”

“George; give the man your code!”

“BOSCO!”

“"Serenity now....serenity now"”

“BAAAAAD Chicken!
Mess you up!
-Kramer”

“"By the way, they're real, and they're spectacular!"”

“And you want to be my latex salesman.”

“hoochie momma!”

“Kramer braked and stopped short? That's my move.

I butchered that one, but it's close.”

“Was it a scratch or a pick?”

“"I don't have time for this George! I've got a cockfight to think about!!"”

“"I was in the POOL!"”

“jgeils- You're correct about Tony only being injured and not killed.”

“THERE WAS NO PICK!!!”

“Anyone watch Larry David's 'Curb Your Enthusiasm' on HBO. It's a really funny show...”

“"She had man-hands"

there was a woman i worked with, i would have found her attractive if it wasnt for her less than feminine hands. they werent hairy, but they were large”

“we're having sex to, save, the friendship??”

“"Newman!"”

“Remember when you first went out to eat with your parents? Remember it was such a treat? You go and they serve you this different food that you never saw before. They put it in front of you and it was such a delicious and exciting adventure... and now I just feel like a big sweaty hog waiting for them to fill up the trough.”

“Sometimes, the road less traveled, is less traveled for a reason.”