When A Woman Should Call It A Night

“21 CLUES A WOMAN SHOULD CALL IT A NIGHT...

1. I have absolutely no idea here my purse is.

2. I believe that dancing with my arms overhead and wiggling my butt while yelling WOO-HOO is truly the
sexiest dance move around.

3. I've suddenly decided I want to kick someone's ass and honestly believe I could do it too.

4. In my last trip to "pee" I realize I now look more like Tammy Faye Baker than the goddess I was
just four hours ago.

5 . I drop my 3:00 a.m. burrito on the floor (which I'm eating even though I'm not the least bit
hungry), pick it up and carry on eating it.

6. I start crying and telling everyone I see that I love them sooooo much.

7. There are less than three hours before I'm due to start work.

8. I've found a deeper/spiritual side to the geek sitting next to me.

9. The man I'm flirting with used to be my 5th grade teacher.

10. The urge to take off articles of clothing, stand on a table and sing or dance becomes strangely
overwhelming.

11. My eyes just don't seem to want to stay open on their own so I keep them half closed and think it looks exotically sexy.

12. I've suddenly taken up smoking and become really good at it.

13. I yell at the bartender, who (I think) cheated me by giving me just lemonade, but that's just
because I can no longer taste the gin.

14. I think I'm in bed, but my pillow feels strangely like the kitchen floor.

15. I start every conversation with a booming, "DON'T take this the WRONG WAY but..."

16. I fail to notice that the toilet lid's down when I sit on it.

17. My hugs begin to resemble wrestling take-down moves.

18. I'm tired so I just sit on the floor (wherever I happen to be standing) and take a quick nap.

19. I begin leaving the buttons open on my button-fly pants to cut down on the time I'm in the
bathroom away from my drink.

20. I take my shoes off because I believe it's their fault that I'm having problems walking straight.

21. I start believing that everyone in the room wants to see my boobs.”

“good night last night Ruby? ;o)”

“Number 21 is true.”

“I would search the bars late at night looking for you.”

“stove stomper is right”

“21 is only true if the room is full of straight men and lesbians.”

“I think I've thought all of those things at one time or another...”

“But don't let that little fact stop anybody, especially if I'm there.”

“except the one about the 5th grade teacher. Eeuuwwy!”

“Not that I would know...

Ruby
12:57:03 PM
07/21/04

oh... but I think you do know, Ruby Darlin!”

“Yes, thank you, I had a good night last night. But none of the above was involved at all. But there was that evening two weekends ago that involved far too much vodka, far too few clothes, too many people, and a hot tub.”

“Ive had those kind of nights!

Oh I love you all!!!You are all so great :P :)”

“Sounds like fun!”

“sooo, whatcha gonna do about your gym buddy embear.... gonna go for it or what?”

“Please invite me next time! ;-)”

“Say good night, Ruby.”

“Gym Bob?”

“Y2- yeah. I think I'll see what happens. At least he is still in the party'n stage, so maybe I can have a night like Ruby's...LOL!”

“I say go for it, embear! Make him the happiest 22-year-old around. Just make sure he doesn't still live in his mom's basement. Not cool.”

“Damn Ruby and why weren't you at Ithaca?????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????”

“Corrupt that youth.”

“But none of the above was involved at all. But there was that evening two weekends ago that involved far too much vodka, far too few clothes, too many people, and a hot tub."
Ruby
01:12:21 PM

Come on now Vic, I thought just you and I partied like that?”

“Hey Ruby:
I remember the rumor around campus in '90 about a chick that did all 21 of these every night at the Trader and Trapper. Was that YOU?? :)”

“I was with my BF for that weekend. So sorry I missed Ithaca. I will be at the next big TT gathering I hope. Maybe TC4?”

“You should add:

22. You show off your old cheerleading routine where you put your ankles behind your ears.”

“Yam, hahahhahahaha! I forgot about that place! Nope, wasn't me. But I'm positive it was my roommate. She also "partied with the band" (ahem) when Poison and Ratt came to town that year at the FargoDome. Needless to say, she was never ever home during the dark hours.”

“aero, my man!”

“that was a cheerleading move?”

“Number 22 would certainly impress me.”

“The "Fargo Dome"?

Whoa, big time!!~”

“Jon won't be able to make that trip, right ?!?!

OK, Everyone please get off Ruby's website, the pictures are loading too slowly!

;)”

“For the popular cheerleaders, anyway.”

“Ah.....the FargoDome. I (don't) recall a time when I walked to it for the GNR concert. And got lost in the parking lot. And I was drinking Mad Dog 20/20.”

“aero, have you seen Cirque du Soleil?”

“AAAHHHH Mad Dog. Wish I had some of that this past weekend.”

“Okay guys, let's all set up a private trip with Ruby and bring drinks mixin's along.”

“No, he can't do any trips with me for a year. He leaves for Afghanistan in a week. I am so sad, but I'm so proud of him.

WoundedKnee, where's the New Year's party going to be this year? And will you please sing your song again?”

“Mad Dog 20/20 at the Trader and Trapper?..... I've led a sheltered life ;o)”

“I don't know who will be having it. Anything you want me to sing, I am there!”

“Ynami--

Hey ya.......hey hey ya.

That's all I have to say to you. :)”

“What school is in Fargo, ND?

Yam and Ruby went there?”

“Yam, you're still drinking that stuff...I SAW YOU last weekend, remember???”

“Hot Babes U?”

“North Dakota State Bison! MoooHooo!”

“Could be BoBo.”

“Were either of you there in Fall 1991? I have a good story.”

“"Hot Babes U?"
Capn Bobo
01:35:56 PM

More like F U, mister!




(Fargo University)”

“No way, no lame-o NDSU student here, but good ol' Moorhead State alumni baby! Party central> (or so I thought in my little sheltered life)”

“MD20/20. Yep. I remember a night where we had been drinking that at a party at NDSU then drove back to MSU. Got pulled over. (Thankfully I wasn't driving.) But we all got minors that night. Wonder if that's still on my record?


The FargoDome was the biggest thing to happen to that area of the country in years! It was all anyone ever talked about. Then when it was finally built, when they did the weather report on TV and showed the Doppler Weather Radar, they realized that the FargoDome had been built in such a way that a big pie-shaped section of the radar was blocked. When you looked at the screen there was no radar data in that area. We never knew what the weather was like in that swath of North Dakota. lol”

“yam said Morehead.”