She's Got Him Wrapped Around Her Finger

“Talk about having your soul captured for eternity!

No Way Jose!

Cremation Yes. Just don't turn the heat up soo high!”

“I dunno, I think it's kinda cool.

But I'm still holding out for the Viking funeral. Right now I'm planning to spend my declining years building the boat.”

“That is the most frustrating thing ever! All I want is to read the story. Can't read the words for the slideshow box, can't move or close the box and when I finally gave up and looked at the slides I couldn't get back to the story. GRRRR.

So someone tell me, how did she do it?”

“Cool.”

“It sounds like it would be better for birch if Sass didn't know...”

“Well, she is something of a spitfire and she managed to heat the ashes with her firey breath.

She then used tremendous pressure, some women are good at that.......”

“Sometimes I wish I could turn my wife into a big screen TV.”

“But I'm still holding out for the Viking funeral. Right now I'm planning to spend my declining years building the boat."
bitpusher
12:03:25 PM
08/31/04

I'm hoping for a Pharaoh's funeral. Know anyone who wants to build a 100' high pyramid?”

“I heard about that a year or so ago. I say better then carrying your dead hubbies ashes around with you. (not that anyone would do that)”

“aero -- a HDTV? Cool! Send me directions!

zac -- we'll bury you beneath Gothics, I'm sure you'll like it there!”

“How many husbands are going to now meet an early demise, just so the wife can get a new ring?”

“Sometimes I wish I could turn my wife into a big screen TV."
aero
12:08:41 PM

LOL!

Yea, I was hoping for a plasma screen”

“zac -- we'll bury you beneath Gothics, I'm sure you'll like it there!"
Capn Bobo
12:14:52 PM
08/31/04

Actually I would like my ashes dropped from a plane over the Boquet River as it flows off of Dix Mountain. Unfortunately it is illegal to do so.”

“Sass, she sent the cremains to a place that uses heat and pressure to turn them into a diamond.”

“Funny Story:

My Dad had my grandfather's ashes in his truck when he went to the barber's to get a hair cut. My dad told Mike the Barber that my grandpop was out in the Truck. Mike the Barber went over and opened the barbershop door, "Tell him to come in, don't leave him out in the truck!!!"
(I think Mike the Barber was looking for more business!)”

“Woman Turns Husband's Remains Into Diamond


A Minnesota woman has honored her late husband by turning his cremated remains into a yellow diamond so she could always keep a part of him with her.

Nancy Wodziak wanted to honor her husband Richard in a special way after he died from a brain tumor last October. So, she became the first person in the state to turn a loved one's remains into a diamond.

Wodziak received her brilliant,half-carat yellow diamond after eight months of waiting.

"This certainly seems like a neat idea as far as diamonds are forever," Bradshaw Funeral and Cremation Services spokesman Justin Bradshaw said. "Some people feel it's a neat thing and that they're glad that I told them and other people I think feel that this is not for them."

"I think that's creepy," a woman said in the report.

To create the ring, the cremated remains are heated to extreme temperatures, and then the carbon is subjected to a tremendous amount of pressure. The result is a stone identical to diamonds that develop deep within the earth over millions of years

The nitrogen in the air causes the diamonds to be yellow in color. The company says yellow diamonds also occur naturally but are very rare.

The cost for a quarter carat is about $2,500 and goes up to $13,000 for a full carat. The diamonds can be made into any size.

Life Gem offers the services and some funeral homes assist loved ones in making the arrangements.

The company also makes diamonds from the cremated remains of pets.”

“birch... DON'T FALL ASLEEP!!!”

“I'm sorry, but this reminds me of a dirty joke, lol....”

“Which finger will have that ring?”

“While the story says it's going into a ring, the woman only recieved a diamond. She could put it on anything, I suppose...”

“Hmmmmmmm. So she could use it as a piercing, perhaps?”

“Sure, it could be mounted on a stud and put, well, ANYWHERE....”

“True. But with it on a finger it could also be put "anywhere".”

“Guy: Wow, that stud feels great...
Girl: Glad you like it, it's my dead husband.
Guy: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!”

“Unless you're into that sort of thing.”

“LOL bit!”

“Gives a whole new meaning to the term "necrophilia"...”

“I think the yellow color in the diamond comes from the arsenic, not nitrogen”

“Would that count as a threesome Bit?”

“Technically, I suppose so.

I dunno, if you like being beaten with leather whips, does that count as masochistic bestialic necrophilia?”

“One day she asked what color diamond I wanted her to be!

It is pretty weird, yet cool.”

“Nice going bit. Now lz's gonna be stealing ashes so he can have threesomes.”

“You're gonna have a threesome with your mother pixie????

Wow! I'm moving to LA!”

“I know, I know, I'm a real troublemaker.”

“"Nice going bit. Now lz's gonna be stealing ashes so he can have threesomes."
bearmagnet
12:56:00 PM
08/31/04

What a good idea.

lol”

“Some people cant ever let go!

Its a little strange to me. What if the widow meets another man and falls in love. Whats she gonna tell him, "I'm wearing my dead husband?"”

“You wouldn't be a troublemaker bit if there weren't so many immature children on here with one track minds.

I will ignore myself so I can't read my posts anymore!

"click"!”

“'Tis "baggage" to an extreme, eh embear?”

“Maybe older people deal with this sort of thing differently than us youngsters.”

“well, we all grieve nomater if youre old or not. Thats normal. But this seems like its going a little too far for me.”

“Well, I meant the "old baggage in a new relationship" part. My guess is if you're starting a new relationship with someone who was married for 40 years to someone else (now dead) they're still going to have feeling for that person and you just have to deal with it.

Now, if I met a woman who kept her husband's freeze-dried corpse sitting on a bench in a gazebo in her back yard, I might think twice no matter what!”

“What if she meets a guy and...........forget fallin' in love”

“...and what? Turns him into a diamond too?

If you meet a woman with a diamond tennis bracelet on and she says they're all her former husbands, RUN!”

“So, the Hope Diamond is really a big fat guy?”

“It'd take a lot of fat guys to make the Hope Diamond.”

“Maybe now that the husband is out of the way.........she may want to play.”

“This thread is so evil I'm thinking of printing it then having it laminated and hung on my office wall.

I guess we're all bitter and twisted.”

“I guess we're all bitter and twisted."
gremlin
01:36:10 PM
08/31/04

I take offence to that. I may be twisted, but I'm too young to be bitter. Give me ten years or so and then maybe I'll be bitter.”

“Nigal: Hey Sass, haven't seen Birch for a while, how's he doing?

Sass: He's busy at work.

Nigal: Hey, is that a new ring?

Sass: Yeah, it's Birch, I mean from Birch.

Nigal: Oh!”