En Garde, you dog!

“Some thirty years ago my ex-brother-in-law was looking for an old farm to buy in eastern Ontario. He started hanging round Lancaster where there are a lot of abandoned and overgrown farms.

Well, there's a species we like to call EOA's (Eastern Ontario A$$holes) an Anglo Canadian version of Good Ol' Boys.

Anyway, a farmer got thrown out of the local hotel for being drunk and unruly. Unfortuantely home wasn't too far away and he came back with his backhoe, dug a hole in the parking lot and pushed the owner's car in and buried it.

True story.

About twenty years ago the Police stopped a man in Quebec City (Franco trous de cul) for obviously impaired driving. They made him get out of his car, but before they could ask for his papers there was a car accident right beside them and the cops went over.

Thinking this was his lucky day, the drunk jumped into his car and drove home, parking in the garage.

The next day the cops knock on the door and ask himm where he head been the prvious evening. When he replied he'd stayed home all evening they asked him where his car was.

When he assured them it was in the garage, the police asked to see it and, you guessed it, there was the cop car.

Another true story.”