Parenting 101

“No return policy once you buy...”

“Huh, HPM never recieved his copy! Lol!”

“Neither did I, treebait. Neither did I.”

“I did.





Snip-Snip”

“ROFL!”

“when your 6 year old looses a tooth..tuck them in bed...being sure the tooth is placed safely on the nightstand for the Tooth Fairy. Discuss with said child how exciting it will be in the morning. Wait for said child to fall asleep BUT....

NEVER NEVER NEVER...lay down yourself while waiting for the child to drift off. The next morning YOU WILL PAY A HEAVY PRICE W/ GUILT!”

“Lol!”

“I have woken up at 3:00AM in a cold sweat, asking my wife if she remembered to do the tooth-present exchange.

This has saved me more than once. Well, that and the fact that my kids are pretty heavy sleepers.”

“my daughter walked in my room this morning with her hand reached out..tooth laying dead in the center with the most pitiful face known to man. It took me a minute to get the sleep wiped out of my eyes ...then it hit me..OH GOD! I think I have convinced her b/c she pulled it out after dark the tooth fairy had already left her house for deliveries and that she is probably on tonights list....sound good?”

“Good luck with the 2nd night save. That really must hurt. :-(”

“Thats and excellent come back.”

“Bad Parent! No doughnut! ;-)”

“Sounds like the tooth fairy will be leaving extra cash tonight.”

“OK, it's time for the non-parent to pipe up and give us all a hard time for having our kids believe in an imaginary being.
last edited: 5/06/05 9:58:45 AM”

“dayhiker--I was right proud of that one myself...didn't realize I could think that fast at 6am prior to my feet hitting the floor.

I so wanted to win 2005 Parent of the Year. OH well maybe next year.”

“santa, toothfairy, god, whatever...”

“LOL @ bit.

nice catch!”

“Yes, my mindset is so stuck in the late '50's. I have to watch it sometimes...lol...”

“yeah...carlette...that did it. u saved the day.

another parenting lesson:
Make sure your child is at an appropriate age when you try to explain that there is no Santa Claus.

Yeah, I did that! I felt bad after he started crying, but strangly he completely forgot that I ever said that for the next 2 years.”

“What do you mean there is no Santa Claus.

;,(”

“bah!

just let them find out from an older kid at school.

same with sex.”

“Gemini - sounds like a big case of denial!”

“Yeah, I did that! I felt bad after he started crying, but strangly he completely forgot that I ever said that for the next 2 years.”
Gemini
11:04:40 AM

Denial...its a good thing.. :D”

“I figured out there was no Santa when I was about 8, and saw my Dad bringing the presents in from the car in the middle of the night. Boy, was he pissed! lol...”

“yeah..I'd be pissed too if Santa's sleigh broke down and he just dumped the gifts in the yard...do you blame him!”

“kid logic...

i figured out that there was no easter bunny at very young age.

for easter i got a little wooden baseball bat with my name engraved in it.

i couldn't imagine a big bunny rabbit engraving my name into a bat. just couldn't believe his paws would let him do such fine engraving.

from there it was all downhill...”

“We explained to our kids this past month about there not being a santa clause. The 11 yo I believe already knew, but was allowing her denial system work overtime to keep the illusion. My 9 yo gotta know the truth or it will kill her daughter demanded to know if he was real. She was taken aback at first but soon got over it.

A couple days later I was driving her to school and out of the blue she says "So I guess their really isn't a Tooth Fairy either is there."

We have actually been having fun discussing all the ways we have tricked them over the years. They really enjoyed the fact that it was just gold glitter powder and not fairy dust I would spread from their pillow to the window. One year I even made barbie doll footprints through the dust.

I am a forgetful person so I have had to really shuck and jive a few post tooth fairy mornings to get the money to them in such a way to keep the fantasy going.”

“GOOD IDEA HYWAY! glitter dust and barbie foot prints. The guilt is so bad today I'm gonna do that tonight!!!!

(where do you get glitter powder? I'm assuming its not regular gold glitter.)”

“My wife is a crafting/rubberstamping/scrapbooking/cardmaking addict. Her gear closet (an entire converted bedroom) looks like a craft store. I just walk in and browse the aisles.”

“poor kk, you're THIS CLOSE to being fired!”

“hyway, LOL, my wife's got the same setup. Supposed to be OUR office, but its really HER warehouse/workshop. She's taken over the closet in that room, added a second desk, taken over the first desk...

I gotta remember the glitter powder thing. My oldest is going to start loosing her teeth soon.”

“lol..can she do that?”

“I'm gonna visit Michael's Craft..shall report to the masses WTF glitter dust is. I don't have a wife...geeshh.”

“Techntrek, you'll find that warehouse useful in your endeavors to pull the wool over the eyes of your daughter. Kids are easy to trick because they so want to believe LOL....

One year my eldest wanted a greenhouse for christmas. I bought the lumber and material and wrapped it all with a ribbon and left a note from Santa explaining how the Auraura Boriealis had affected his flight path and put him behind schedule so that he didn't have time to construct it that night. Santa assured her that he had checked my profile on his naughty or nice list and was confident that with her help her father could construct the greenhouse. If on the other hand she still wanted it done by Santa that his construction elves would be back from post christmas vacation in the bahamas in April and would build it then.”

“barbie footprints and glitter? My kids would've never slept a minute if they saw footprints in their room. lol

Yeah, I think the easterbunny was first. they figured that out real quick.

toothfairy was next because my forgetful ass...well...I kept forgetting...

we don't have a toothfairy in Germany...so I wasn't used to it.”

“who needs the toothfairy?

you guys get 2 christmas!”

“Yeah, my kids never really believed in teh easter bunny ... come on, a 6 foot rabbit that craps chocolate eggs... who thought that one up?”

“carlette, I think it is embossing powder or something like that.

I sound like my wife now, "Honey, could you put this bladder thingie away?"”

“what u mean 2 christmas? we have 2 christmas holidays...but only one day were we get the presents: Christmas eve.

Dec 6th is santas day. kids put their biggest pair of boots outside and santa comes and fills 'em up with candy. That's sort of cool, and I miss it over here.

when I was little I was scared of santa, because the german santa beats your ass if you wasn't good. LOL...I remember running away crying because I just knew I would get my ass beat big time.”

“LOL, Gem was a naughty girl. ;-)”

“Hey, it could be worse, it could be the Dutch Santa, who has a lackey who stuffs all the bad kids into his sack and takes them to Spain...”

“ewww, i wouldn't want to eat candy out of my hiking boots”

“i've done the second night save a couple of times with teeth.

I also got caught once and SWORE that i was just tucking him in cause he looked cold.

i don't think he bought it though - he was already having doubts at the time.”

“ok I found it. Premium fine pastel assortment...its a fat plastic jar with dividers in it. Lets see...pastel blue, white (iridescent),purple,yellow, teal and pink...very fairy like. this is gonna be one gigantic mess tomorrow morning.”

“My wife buys them all in their own bottles. maybe twice as wide as a film cannister. Just a pinch or so really does the trick”

“man, the extents parants will go to...”

“Its really more for the parents to relive their childhood :) or at least it is for me”

“ya, i hear that.

holidays pretty much stink for us non-parants.”

“if it will make you feel better you can buy presents for my kids”