Red State 'Values'

“Local man charged with animal molestation

A Freeburg man faces felony charges after police said he molested the family dog.

Gene D. Teufert, 49, of 3414 Robin Lane in Freeburg was charged Wednesday with two counts of sexual conduct with an animal.

One of the charges was enhanced because a person younger than 18 years old witnessed the dog's molestation.

St. Clair County Investigator Bill Kenny was observing an interview of a child at the Child Advocacy Center to investigate an allegation of the molestation, said Master Sgt. Steve Johnson.

During the interview, the child said Teufert inappropriately touched the family dog -- a Shih Tzu mix named Max, Johnson said.

Continuing the investigation, Kenny interviewed Teufert's family and friends and discovered the suspect would frequently manually stimulate the dog.

According to the charges, Teufert engaged in sexual activity with a male companion animal, a dog, for the purpose of the dog's sexual gratification during the period of Jan. 1 to May 31.
<snip>”

“ABILENE, Kan. — Outside, the prairie lies dark and still. In the windowless gray building by the Interstate 70 offramp, a clerk with a tired face rings up sex toys. "Need batteries for that?" she asks politely, again and again.

Two women in prim business suits gawk at a shelf of raunchy gag gifts, giggling. A truck driver searches thousands of DVDs for a pornographic movie. Near the Love Sling of Ecstasy, a wife confers with her husband by cellphone as she studies a tidy display of vibrators, hundreds of them, in every size and color.

Adult "superstores" like this are popping up all over rural America — brightly lighted, clean, as well-organized and well-stocked as a Wal-Mart.

Remote freeway offramps are X-rated in Quaker City, Ohio (pop. 563), and Nelson, Mo. (pop. 212), in Montrose, Ill., and Perry, Mich. The Lion's Den chain operates 29 stores in the Midwest, including this one in Abilene, off Exit 272, near the cows and hay bales of Dickinson County.

Full Story”

“I dont see the correlation in Story 1. The point between story 2 and 3 is obvious....as more porn shops go up in the red states, teen pregnancy will go down in those states.
last edited: 12/07/04 12:23:31 PM”

““You suck as a troll 'fiddle'.
VioliN
10:27:13 AM
12/07/04”

“...and less dogs will be diddled. Your Brilliant Viola”

“So what does that mean V?

That Blue State girls are slower to develop into attractive women?

That Blue State boys don't know what to do with a woman until much later in life?

Is it lack of sex?
or lack of contraception ?
or lack of sex with a member of the opposite sex ?

Your stats do not provide any clues as to the reason.”

“I thought all blue state metrosexuals were married, childless by choice and drove electric cars with Kerry stickers on them? Maybe this has something to do with it?”

“They aren't my stats dingus.”

“So we're gettin' some and you're not, what's your point?”

“But you saw it as necessary to post them V. So you now admit that you post stuff which you do not identify with


TROLL”

“Hmmm, the usual suspects chime in.”

“A city man in a small town was in the barn doing a dog. One on the town's boys walks in catching him red-handed doing the goat. Well, in this town it is illegal to do a goat so the boy runs and gets the sherrif and the man is arrested.

Now the man has two good attorneys, one is real good at getting people off on technicalities and the other is real good at picking the right jury for the crime that was committed. Well the man says, "Hell I was caught red-handed so I don't think I can get off on a technicality." So he went with the lawyer that could pick the right jury.

So the trial starts and his lawyer starts out by putting the man on the stand.

He yells out, "Now sir you were caught red-handed in the barn doing a dog, how are you going to explain this?"

The man says, "Well, I was in the barn and Mother Natured called and I needed to relieve myself. So when I pulled it out to piss that there dog backed right up on me."

A silence came over through the courtroom and then one jury man looked at the man next to him and said, "Ya know, a good dog will do that!"”

“We needed a new thread for this?”

“That's a bytch !”

“Yup...the War in Iraq is going "exceptionally well" and teen pregnancy is up in God's country because that's where men are men and real men have sex with teenagers.

Yee Haa!!

Keep up the good work Violin.

Got anything new on the the donor and taker states?”

“Excellent geo.....Oliphant is great”

“NEW ORLEANS (AP) — An 8-year-old girl is serving a nine-day elementary school suspension for bringing to school what appeared to be about 30 "Jell-O shots," though it was unclear whether they contained alcohol, a Jefferson Parish schools spokesman said.

The incident occurred Nov. 29, as the girl stood after classes outside Geraldine Boudreaux Elementary School in Terrytown, a New Orleans suburb, schools spokesman Jeff Nowakowski said. A teacher spotted liquid dripping out of the student's bookbag, looked inside and found what looked like the small cups of alcohol-laced gelatin that are sold in bars, Nowakowski said.

The girl told Principal Dorothy Bailey that her mother, who works in a bar, makes alcoholic shots at home and sells them at work. The fourth-grader said her mother had instructed her to take the shots to school and sell them, three for $1, "to make some money for Christmas,'" Nowakowski said.

continued...”

“I see GeoBeatsHisMeat and Violin haven't found dates yet.”

“From a story in the St. Louis Post-Dispatch:

"You could have heard a pin drop on the floor of the Missouri House during a recent mock debate to train freshman legislators after newcomer Representative-elect Cynthia Davis, Republican-O'Fallon, committed the first gaffe. Davis cited the House rulebook to prevent current Representative Chuck Graham, Democrat-Columbia, from continuing to speak. Davis said members `cannot be recognized on the floor to debate unless they are standing, and I don't believe he (Graham) is standing.' Graham, a six-year veteran of the House, has been in a wheelchair since a car accident twenty-one years ago."
last edited: 12/27/04 5:50:32 AM”

“Now that is funny :-)”

“Another satisfied graduate of the Dan Quayle School of Oh-My-God-I-Just-Said-Something-Really-Stupid.”

“Oh my”

“Here's one from our fair, red state, Montana:

Sen. Butcher to apologize for comments
By ALLISON FARRELL
Gazette State Bureau

HELENA - Rep.-elect and current Sen. Ed Butcher, R-Winifred, will apologize for the derogatory comment he made about special education students last week, incoming House Speaker Roy Brown, R-Billings, said Wednesday.

Some school administrators are calling for Butcher's removal from the 2005 Legislature's House Education Committee after he called severely disabled students ‘'vegetables” during a public meeting of the central Montana school superintendents last week.

Butcher, who dubbed his comment an “unfortunate choice of words,” is also being criticized for the comments he made about minority students during the same meeting. Butcher said Nevada pays its teachers more because they have to “deal” with a more diverse student population.

And in explaining his comments about minority student populations, Butcher said “Montana teachers who leave the state for better-paying jobs elsewhere have to deal with groups of Hispanic, Asian and black gangs that are terrorizing schools.”

http://www.billingsgazette.com/index.php?id=1&tts=1&display=rednews/2004/12/22/build/state/25-butcher.inc”

“Another satisfied graduate of the Dan Quayle School of Oh-My-God-I-Just-Said-Something-Really-Stupid.”
geobeet
1:57:59 PM
12/27/04

Clearly the error is in the House rules, not Ms Davis. The Missouri House policy is descriminatory. I give even odds that a proposal is made this legistlative session to reword the rules :-)”

“Does Montana have any dangerous Redskin gangs or are they all too drunk to organize?”

“Now that was a gaffe!!

Well, Washington doesn't have any "Redskin Gangs" who are much of a threat to anyone.”

“Ah, Ya gotta love these conservative threads where nothing ever changes. The Christmas spirit hasn't dampened the enthusiasm of the bigots.

Bring in the political correctness police and their lawyers! Let no mistake go unpunished.”

“And let’s not forget to ignore "Jesus Land".

By gosh! Who would make such an ignorantly bigoted statement? Let’s just write it off to humor. That way we can all feel good about ourselves and know that we are morally superior to those others folks.”

“Police: Women Use Baby In Shoplifting Escape

HOUSTON -- Three women used a baby in a stroller to help them escape after shoplifting at a store near downtown Houston, police told Local 2 Thursday.

Investigators said the women tried to shoplift from Marshall's, 1542 W. Gray, at 12:45 p.m.

"They had a baby in a stroller. They had placed merchandise behind the baby in a stroller and as they left the store, the manager approached them," said Sgt. Cullen Bean, with the Houston Police Department.

The women took off, trying to escape. Witnesses told police one of the women tried to use the 5-month-old baby's stroller as a barricade.

"They turned the baby stroller sideways, trying to block the manager. When they did, they flipped the stroller and the baby flipped out onto the concrete on the parking lot," Bean said.

Investigators said the women kept running, leaving the baby boy behind.

<snip>”

“These kind of stories never surprise me any more. People sacrafice their kids or loved ones for a quick buck every day.

In a newscast a few months ago, the news interviewed a greiving woman who just lost a young son to an accident or something. She said in the interview something along the lines of sueing and that she can make more kids, it's time to get paid.

Sick wreched humans!”

“Woman convicted for letting toddler smoke pot

By CLAIR JOHNSON
Of The Gazette Staff

A federal judge this week convicted a Gardiner woman who encouraged her toddler daughter to smoke marijuana.

U.S. District Judge Richard Cebull Wednesday found Jessica Durham, 23, guilty of distributing marijuana to a person under the age of 18 years.

Durham will be sentenced April 20 by Senior U.S. District Judge Jack Shanstrom. She faces up to 10 years in prison and a $250,000 fine.

Cebull's ruling comes after a one-day bench trial on Oct. 27 in which a key prosecution witness described how she photographed Durham holding a water pipe while her 18-month-old daughter put her mouth over the top. The water pipe, called a bong, allows smoke to be drawn through water into a glass tube and inhaled.

<snip>”

“bush and porn dont go together at all

guffaw!”

“Maybe Dubya will shave first?”

“WASHINGTON (AP) -- Blond porn star, political candidate. And now you can add one more line to Mary Carey's resume: Republican booster.

Carey was in Washington Tuesday to attend the President's Dinner, an annual fundraiser put on by the National Republican Congressional Committee and the National Republican Senatorial Committee.
[...]
"I met a lot of nice people," Carey said of the lunch, where presidential adviser Karl Rove spoke. "I met some people who talked about helping me with donating money to my next campaign."

She plans to run for lieutenant governor of California next year as an independent. But her trip to Washington has swayed Carey's political leanings. She says she's been a Republican "for a couple of days."
[...]

http://hosted.ap.org/dynamic/stories/P/PORN_STAR_GOP?SITE=APWEB&SECTION=HOME&TEMPLATE=DEFAULT”

“on thing we do need is more porn stars in politics

especially blond ones

HURRAY!”

“Hmmm, if bacpac thinks Clinton getting a BJ was a tragedy, what will he think of this?”

“Well I will bet she is an equal opportunity supporter .. accepts everybody.”

“This is the big tent known as the republican party. They accept everyone...ok, except the log cabin boyz.”

“LOL
Didn't Mary Carey run for CA gov as a Dem?
Not that there's anything wrong with that. ;-)”

“Gives a whole new meaning to the term "stump broke" doesn't it?”

“He should have listened to Neal Horsley and stuck to mules.”

“You got scooped. This was covered yesterday.”

“Damn, Violin doesn't do any work at all all day and cruises the net and STILL he gets scooped? Damn dude, you aren't even good at phucking off.”

“Who are you calling violin, foo!?”

“LOL! Now THAT’S what I call a Freudian slip. Sorry! You must have been working too hard to notice it was already posted.”