Fight in School!

“so i had to go to the doc today to get some blood word done and get a new prescription for my thyroid meds. anyway... my cell phone rang, and I found out....

Bryan (my 14Y old) got in a fight at school! His very first fight and he got suspended. Yeah, I understand it's the 0 tolerence regulation. Dang...

What the hell do you tell your kids about fights? I tell him to walk away but if he keeps buggin you beat the hell out of him. I am not gonna tell him to walk away over and over again.

BTW: The kid was a full head taller then Bryan, but Bryan beat the crap out of him anyway.

Good!! I didn't send him to TaeKwonDo for nothing.

Honestly though...this is hard. I wouldn't walk away...how can I tell my kids to walk away??”

“That sucks! So how long is he suspended? And what about the other kid? Who started it?”

“ah it happens. I had a few at school. If it's his first one doesn't sound like it's gonna be a big problem. Find out what happened before you have a go at him.”

“I wouldn't. My mom always told me to walk away, even when this bully twice my size hit me on a daily basis in fourth grade.

Finally my dad taught me how to deal with a bully.

I broke his nose. Got suspended too!”

“should have givin him your stun gun
learn his @ss big time!”

“The other kid started it. He's suspended for 3 days, but also waiting for a hearing. Already talked to the teacher that broke up the fight. He will recommened that Bryan can continue in this school, but on probation. (Sp??)

Bull...what do the mean Probation?? He has never done anything wrong before. Well..once he didn't have his shirt tucked in...please gimme a break.

it's just bull...i think you have the right to defend yourself.

Y2, I already talked to him. I explained that I am not mad at him, but he needs to know that if it happens again that he could end up in a school with lots of kids that want to fight all the time. (his dad works in one of those schools in the evening)
last edited: 3/04/05 1:55:33 PM”

“I figure if they know that a boy his size (short) can kick someone's ass...they won't try it again, at least not so quick.

Bryan does have a 2 stripe black belt in TKD. He can kick your ass if you screw with him.

anyway, he is a popular kid, so I am not too worried, more about the damn school.”

“Last year I had a problem with a gang of girls that terrorised the school messing with my daughter. My daughter is very petite, but none the less, she would never stand by while someone around her was getting picked on. She would get between them, so she became a favorite target. We complained to the school, but they were slow to react. Finally, I told them, in the presence of my daughter, that I had instructed my daughter, who does have some Hap Ki Do training, that she was free to strike back anytime she felt threatened. And if the school suspended her for defending herself that I would take her to the movies every afternoon of her suspension.

It wasn't long after that that they broke up the gang - suspended one indefinately and split the rest into seperate classrooms.”

“It won't be too long before my son starts at the local TKD class for this very reason.”

“That what happened to me Bison. I always got picked on because of my size. I was a perfect target.

I had always walked away, got ridiculed, teased and what have you. I figured it was not worth fighting if I knew I would get my head caved in.

On day though I snapped. I challanged a kid to a fight at the foot bridge after school. It was off school grounds so we thought we could get away with it. No one ever did though. He said to me that he would give me the first shot because he was so much bigger. He was too! Played football and was a top wrestler!

He must have thought I would try to punch him in the face. He was wrong. As bad as it might sound, I kicked him right between the legs! He did not fall right away, so I kicked the side of his knee as hard as I could and he fell like a ton of bricks.


Have you heard from the parents of the other kid yet Gem? I bet you do.”

“I won't put my kid in Martial arts unless it's something they're really interested in.

I'll just teach'em what my dad taught me, make a fist and smash it into the bridge of their nose right below their eyes. That'll stop 99% of people right there, massive pain.

Nice thing I learned later is that I seem to be immune. Had a kid in high school hit me right there, hard, but my nose didn't break :)
last edited: 3/04/05 2:05:34 PM”

“Well, if your son is usually well mannered,the other kid started it, he was bigger than your son and the other kid got his but handed to him well....

I'm guessing your boy won't have any more problems with kids trying to fight him. Bryan just proved that it's not a good idea to screw with him. Kids pay attention to that.”

“My one and only high school fight ended the bullying. Once they know you might hit back, the bullies stop.
I won the fight. The other kid didn't show back up for 3 days. He didn't want anyone to see his black eye and nose.
Both of us got our a$$es paddlied over it, but it was worth it.”

“so...No one feels that i did the wrong thing by telling him to fight back after a couple times??

actually I told him to walk away 3 times. He didn't. he hit right back after the kid punched first. I really don't care. There is no way I would've walked away either. That's all I can say.

Good for you and your daughter hyway. was that highschool? I think I saw your daughter at the blueberry masacre. she's elementary or middle school?

Highschool is very different. they pick u up with handcuffs and arrest you if you still fight after the teacher arrived.

WK, I haven't heard from the parents yet, but I bet I wont'. Bryan said right before the teacher came the other kid wanted to stop the fight and said "I don't want to get in trouble again"...that's when they stopped, but the other kid already had a swollen eye, so the teacher saw what happend.
last edited: 3/04/05 2:06:36 PM”

“I won't make him do martial arts, but judging from the way he hits and kicks after watching power rangers the interest shouldn't be a problem.”

“I never did understand suspension. "Oh yeah, you mean I get to stay home, sleep in watch TV all day?" Some punishment.”

“Good for Bryan.”

“Gem, as long as he's not starting them AND it's not a continueing problem.
Bake him a cake.”

“There was a bully who picked on me in grade school. One day he was picking on my kid brother, so I flew at him, arms flailing away.

He started laughing because I had attacked him, and that made me even madder. Soon he stopped laughing and started running. He never picked on me or my brother again.

Yeah, I think a kid has to stick up for himself or herself if attacked. My older cousin always told me, "You need to learn one of two things: either how to fight or how to run fast!"”

“There is a difference between defending yourself and fighting just because you are mad. It is always a good idea to teach kids to control themselves and not fight if they can but if someone is wailing on you and you don't fight back you might end up in the hospital.

My dad told me long ago to not start fights but if a fight finds me then I should finish it.”

“That's my thinking HPM.
Some guys fight for 'fun'.
If I have to fight again, it will be for keeps.”

“Gem, she was in 5th grade.

Both my daughters take martial arts. The younger one is more into and is much more brutal during sparring sessions. She routinely kicks ass. One of the best benefits of martial arts training is that they exercise and stretch at the beginning of each class so if you go regularly you don't turn into a butterball like some kids.

The reason I signed them up in the first place wasn't so that they could kick other kids butts, but so that they know they could if the situation arises so they wouldn't resort to fighting just to save face.”

“No one ever picked on me. I was a late bloomer, but got big quick.”

“how come no one ever talks about getting their asses kicked?

how many times have you heard about someone kickin some ass - and of course they did not start the fight either.

there must be like 1 guy running around to every bar and 1 kid running around to every school yard in the country, starting fights and getting their asses kicked.

i'm not saying anyone is lying, it's just a weird obervation, ya know?
last edited: 3/04/05 2:24:38 PM”

“Good for him. If my son was defending himself I'd be congratulating him for kicking the other kids butt. As far as the suspension? So what. The best thing you could do is let him homeschool. IMO public education in this country is finished and little more than government indoctrination camps. Raise a free thinker .... take him out of public school.”

“I dunno, he's gotta judge the situation. I've always walked away if I don't have to deal with the person again. But in school, you gotto draw the line with some people, otherwise they see it as a sign of weakness.”

“I said that my daughter was a target. she was getting knocked down a lot, but never punched or anything like that.”

“My oldest daughter was suspended for fighting last year. I've always told her to defend herself if attacked but to walk away from provocation. In that case, the girl was giving her crap and challenged her to a fight. My daughter followed her to another spot where they fought.

She was punished for a spell longer than her suspension and hasn't gotten in trouble since. She did kick the other girl's butt - she may be pretty but she's strong and the other girls saw that - no more challenges.

I still tell her to defend herself if attacked but not to throw the first punch. Walk away and tell a teacher. I'd back her up completely if she defends herself.”

“where are these bullies?
who's starting all these fights?
who's getting thier asses kicked all over the place?
who's raising these bullies?”

“y2, that's exactelly right. It's different in school. You see the kid every single day. BUT...you also have to be smart about it. What if the other kid is in a gang? That's scary.

SH...yeah....homeschooling would be an option, but we have no kids in this neigborhood, at least not a lot...I don't want him to be sheltered from every single confrontation. He needs to learn to defend himself and show that he's strong!”

“Anyhow, by the age of 14 they're not thinking what their mom told them anyway. He'll react in the same way again if it happens. As long as he doesn't start it.”

“i bet right now there's a mom in gem's hometown telling a co-worker the story of how her son got suspended for 3 days for fighting when the other kid started it!”

“lol Sacco, v true, no kid ever starts a fight.”

“could be true...but he has witnesses.

I mean... like I said: Bryan never got in a fight in his 15 year old life. This was his FIRST fight ever.

The other kid (one head taller) ALWAYS in trouble.

you tell me...
last edited: 3/04/05 2:37:34 PM”

“oh my! This could end up on his permanent record. LOL! I remember a teacher saying that something would end up on my permanent record once. I told her I'd like to view my permanent record. She took me down to the office and I got scared. The only thing in my permanent record was my grades from that particular school and my forms for my sports physicals. ;-)

Schools tend to have a no tolerance policy these days. Violence wouldn't be tolerated in the workplace and I guess it shouldn't be in schools, either.

I like what humanpackmule said..

"My dad told me long ago to not start fights but if a fight finds me then I should finish it.”

humanpackmule
2:15:41 PM
3/04/05”

“i'm not saying your son started it gem. you're probably right on.

i'm just pointing out an observation.

have you ever heard a parant say they raised a bully who picks on other kids?

have you ever heard a guy tell a story about starting a fight in a bar and then getting beat up?

yet from all the stories of guys beating up jerks in bars, and kids finally standing up to bullies and winning, there must be some bad kids/jerks out there.

it was always the other kid/person/gang starting a fight. and the good guy always wins the fight.”

“sacco - have you considered that the one's getting their butt handed to them don't repeat the story ever again while the victor mentions it? What's the quote, the winners write the history books.”

“Sacco...I gotcha! It is sort of true... no kid ever tells how bad he gotten beat up.

well...unless your german, then you'll tell it all. LOL

I like that quote dayhiker!”

“of course DH, but who are all these parants raising bullies?

every single parant thinks their kids only finish fights. their kids don't start fights.

well where are all these jerks raising little bullies at? do they come from the sewers or something?”

“sacco, here's a clue.
Check for bumper stickers.
If they have a
"My kid beat up your honor school student"
sticker, they might be the one's you are searching for.
We have several on TT that might have that sticker on their cars. ;-)”

“I wanna get one of those bumper stickers, those honors student crap really annoys me.”

“There ya go! ;-)”

“Still....Whoohoooohooooo!!!!!
he won't touch my kid again.

another question though:
in Germany my sons hands are considered a deadly weapon. Isn't it similar here in the states?

that could spell trouble if he ever gets in another fight and really hurts the other person.”

“i think i'm gonna raise my kid to be a prick on purpose. atleast that way there won't be any doubt in my mind.

i'll sit them down and tell them,"look johny, there's an awful lot of little wimpy kids out there that need a beatin'. i know you're scared inside, but what's important is proving to all them other kids how tough and cool you are. oh, and by the way, make sure you teach the other kids about sex, santa clause, smoking, and swearing. after all, someone's gotta."


"and suzy, my darling daughter, it's important for you to pick on the other little girls. make sure you tell them how fat they are every chance. you know you're doing a great job when the other girls start puking up their lunches every day."
last edited: 3/04/05 2:59:01 PM”

“then i'll buy one of those bumper stickers stomper”

“How about the bumper sticker

"My kid got your honor school student pregnant"

Seen in central NJ”

“

Here ya go, sacco! ;-)”

“Sorry, a little late to this thread....

I'm a big advocate of keeping altercations non-violent - "Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me."

BUT, if he was defending himself after the other kid threw the first punch, I'd threaten to sue the school for not allowing my son to defend himself. I'd also contact the other kid's parent(s) and tell them if they didn't contact the school and insist the "good guy" not be suspended, I'd call the police and have him arrested for battery (especially with witnesses).

Kids should be taught to NEVER throw a first punch, but ALWAYS defend themselves if attacked.”

“That will make your kid popular in school...”

“Make more lawyers money too.”