How to entice your woman

“My wife moans and groans when I tell her of a newly planned excursion. She always asks why she is not invited. It's not that she isn't, it's just that she doesn't seem to gravitate to the wilderness like I do. So recently I invited her, as did all my trail buddies invite their signifigant others. Well things were fine until the weather forecast started calling for slight chance of rain and falling nighttime temps (45 low). All women simultaneously began to relinquish themselves from the trip. I ended up sepnding the night around a campfire at my uncle's land 45 minutes from my house.

I don't want to be a jerk, but how do these women expect to get invited on lenghty excursions if this is the way they are gonna react to a mild weather inconvenience?

Have any of y'all run into this, and if so, how did you successfully deal with it?”

“Only hike with TT Brand Women!!! ;-)
TT women ROCK!!!”

“Ummm...that you married a non-outdoorsy woman?
Don't come whining to us ladies here! Pffffftttt!!!!
Dude, I go backpacking when it is 5* out and snowing! And my man knows he better not whine.

Hehheh....”

“BowlderGal has agreed to backpack with me and BowlderSon once every decade. So far she went with me in the 90's and with the two of us in the 2000's, so she's off the hook until 2010! Oh, I bail in known bad weather too, so no argument there....
last edited: 5/05/05 11:36:02 PM”

“My wife spent 7 years living in a cabin on the side of a hill outside Asheville, with no electricity or running water. I assumed she could handle a little weather, but I guess the 5 years since then has softened her up too much.”

“Hey Sarbar,
One of these days ya gotta email me your gear list for summer & winter - I know you and your son travel lighter than me & mine, and I'd like to learn yer tricks....”

“Not a problem! How old is Bowlderboy anyways? ;-)
No man in my family is whimpy }:-) Samrt though ;-) Light is good!”

“sorry for using part of your copy...but men are not the only ones that have that problem.

I have invited my HUSBAND once, and he bailed. That's it. Have never done it again, and prolly won't. Not a big deal.

You have to work with whatcha got. I like going on my own. I am around my family all the time. Going on trips with TT or others is MY time away from home.”

“What is it that bothers non-campers about camping? Being cold, getting wet, blisters, getting bit by mosquitoes, squatting to pee/poo. Do what you can to address each of those issues for her. Ease her into it. Show her that it's enjoyable. Turn it into something romantic maybe.

Maybe start her out on something easier, like car camping somewhere where they have shower facilities and real toilets. Or someplace with a cabin. I think a lot of state parks have them for rent. And slowly go more and more primitive. Of the utmost importance is make sure she has excellent gear. Get her a good sleeping pad, like a Big Agnes Insulated Air Core or the InsulMat, and a good warm bag. If she has a crappy sleep, she'll never go again. Make sure she has fantastic wet weather gear because being wet is miserable. Bring some hand warmers along to throw into the foot of her bag so she won't have cold feet, as many women suffer from. With the proper clothing and gear, one can enjoy almost any type of weather. And another thing, do everything you can to make sure she doesn't get a blister. And if she does, make sure you have every trick in the book in your first aid kit to fix it ASAP.

Then again, maybe she just isn't going to enjoy roughing it. So your compromise might be a few times a year taking her to a hotel for the weekend, making her feel special. Then you go to the wilderness with your buddies.”

“I've been very accomodating...believe me. I even hiked in one of those collapsable lawn chairs in a bag things one time so she wouldn't have to sit on the ground. And I'm taking her to Mexico for a week in June. We'll get to see some ruins. I'm excited. I like beaches. Tulum is supposed to be real nice. Not as crowded as Cancun. Anyone been there?”

“Ruby's got it. I always have carried a little more than my share, made sure things were comfortable, etc. BowlderGal didn't have bad experiences - in fact, rather likes the hiking part - but just would rather sleep in a bed. We're both cool with that. Have been for 15 YEARS OF MARRIAGE AS OF TOMORROW!!!!”

“Woohoo! Congrats BowlderMan!

My 15 year anni is in about 7 weeks.”

“Just remeber that bping isn't for everyone. Thank god! My Husband dosn't care for it either. He went with me once. Doubt he ever goes again. He hunts during the winter and that's his escape time. Bping is mine. We respect each other for it and look forward to our outings.”

“I just smile at her, then lick my eyebrows.”

“I personaly got into BPing to have some me time. If my wife ever decides she wants to check it out then I will take her, but Im not gonna beg her to come on a trip that I plan to be away from everything hehe.”

“LOl...I must admit to that Bping is me time also...while I am fortunate to have an outdoor BF, he has a massive work schedule, so cannot always go...but heck I have oodles of hiking buddies in the PNWH group, so I go with them..and love it! And he gets time to him self. He also prefers beds to Thermarests due to his back issues, so we do a lot of dayhikes together.”

“Every summer the wife and I go to my uncle's ranch (near the Sweetwater) in Wyoming for a couple weeks. We load up the 4-wheelers and trailer with a huge cabin/outfitters tent, king-sized air mattress, comfortable chairs, a generator, lots of good grub, and all sorts of creature comforts. We head out, try to get lost, swim and hike around in the good weather, and spoil ourselves in luxury during the rain.

That's how I get my wife in the wilderness. Sometimes we invite friends, too. We're certainly lucky to have access to such a large chunk of private property to get away from it all.”

“damn, I am surprised. I really thought I am one of few that consider backing as "ME" time.

After I come back from a trip I am in the best mood ever. Trust me hubby does like that very much. He goes fishing, hunting; I go backpacking.”

“Some people just don't like it. you invite her to go and she doesn't want to then you've done your part.”

“I wish my wife wanted to go sometime, but she clearly doesn't like sleeping on the ground and sitting in the dirt. I learned a long time ago that it doesn't pay to drag someone along who doesn't want to go.

Being on trail patrol as a Forest Service Volunteer I have seen lots of situations where guys talked their wives and/or kids into joining them for a backpacking trip. I check their permit and get away as fast as possible...I hate whining and lying!!!”

“bionicear, you can't really blame any person for not wanting to go camping or hiking in premium weather. Let's face it, a sunny day with decent night time temps are better than cold evenings and rain. I like it cloudy in warm weather, so the sun is not beating down on me.

Also, it helps if the wives are equipped to handle the not as nice weather by having the correct gear to keep them warm and dry.

On cold nights, I just do day hikes, especially if I can't have a campfire where I'm camping.”

“I can't help you. I met my man on the trail! :)


I 2nd what Sarbar already said though.”

“bionicear, to entice your wife, bring her on the easiest trails with the nicest views and have something good with you for dinner. A reward of a great view is an incentive.”

“That's funny.

You should see all the gear my hubby has to pack... Birch, Sass & Sunshine may remember these:

He wont sit on the ground or anywhere near the ground.

He wont eat if his bowl is anywhere near the ground.

He wont eat food I prepared near the ground.

Now that he has the hammock, he wont sleep anywhere near the ground...which leads to:

we can only backpack places with trees.

He used to complain about being too hot or too cold because of his glasses, so I made him get Lasik.

He has yet to go with me anywhere this spring...now his excuse is that he can't ride his Harley enough if we go on these excursions. (Which I suspect is why he bought me mine).

This is all from a guy who carries his fishing pole in his work vehicle and remembers the good old days of when he lived out in the country with his family. He used to hunt, ice fish, raise rabbits for fur, etc....

:-P”

“Jus ttell your wife that you will be hiking with a bunch of other hot single college student aged ladies and I am sure she'll have no problem with going with you.”

“You people need to get your mates into bping and hiking while fresh into the relationship. Thats when people are most willing to try new things or try hardest to please each other lol.

Im like a big kid 34 yrs old and I race motorcycles in the summers, have remote control planes and cars, into computers big time. Im basicly a huge nerd just dont look like one. so the women I get have no problem doing whatever. They just have to be playful LOL. I dated a few sour lemons who refused to do anything outdoorsy except walks in parks or going to beaches. I took them back to the produce stands :) Ha ha

--Doga Yonv”

“Easy...tell her she can't do it.”

“Spirit Coyote..lol!!
We have this one guy in our group who is happily married (his wife cannot go out in the cold due to metal plates in her face)..and he always tells the guys he works with how "his wife lets him go out with hot young girls"...lol! Yeah right! We call him "Daddy" and "Pops" :-P
Di knows who I am talking about ;-)

I'd actually say in our hiking group that rarely does our SO's come with us. Di's does sometimes, but usually we are all single on the trips....which I think is good for us to have "me" time :-) And then nobody has to listen to any heavy breathing at night...lol!!

(Good thing Synch doesn't get jealous about me having male partners!..er, most of the tiem he doesn't :-P”

“LOL! Carlette, that got me wanting to backpack. My ex said I couldn't handle it. When we broke up, I started to want to go even more. So I found PNWH and now I go as often as I can. Hooray me! (But I actually enjoy it. It's not about him anymore at all. Although I wouldn't mind if he somehow found out about it. hee hee.)

but bionic, if she used to live that way all the time, maybe she is sick of it now. I ditto what y2 said. Always ask her if she would like to go, so she feels included. When she says no, go without her. If she ever says anything, point out that you want her to go and always extend the invitation, etc. Sounds like a win/win to me.”

“Pix...its a basic law....tell me I can't then watch me! :D”

“Maria iss not ze outdoorzy type, so I von't take her hikink viss me.”

“Pixie...I rember the first time I went backpacking...yep, to impress some dumb guy in college. Went out for a WEEK in borrowed gear! Hated every second of it. And yet I went backpacking again that summer! (that was uh...1992? 1993?)
Then I didn't backpack again till 2001. Fer some reason I got this bug to do it. Maybe to prove to my ex also that I could do something he wasn't comfy with ;-)
Of course, buying my own gear did make it a better expirence..lol! Nothing worse than sucky gear!”

“The first time my wife asked me why I never took her backpacking with me, my reply was, "You don't understand dear, I go backpacking to get away from you". That was a long time ago. Since that time I've taken her out once. She loved it. My philosophy is that while I'm at home, she cleans and cooks and does laundry for me. When I take her backpacking or car camping (which she does frequently) it's her turn to relax. I do the shopping, the packing, pitching tents etc. I cook, I clean up, and I pamper her in every way I know how while we're in the out-doors. I enjoy doing it, and she enjoys the break.”