Mathematical proof that women are EVIL.

“What Would George Harrison Say?

I got my mind set on you

But it’s gonna take money
A whole lotta spending money
It’s gonne take plenty of money
To do it right child

It’s gonna take time
A whole lot of precious time
It’s gonna take patience and time, ummm
To do it, to do it, to do it, to do it, to do it,
To do it right child

I got my mind set on you

And this time I know it’s for real
The feelings that I feel
I know if I put my mind to it
I know that I really can do it

I got my mind set on you
Set on you

But it’s gonna take money
A whole lotta spending money
It’s gonna take plenty of money
To do it right child

It’s gonna take time
A whole lot of precious time
It’s gonna take patience and time, ummm
To do it, to do it, to do it, to do it, to do it,
To do it right child”

“I may be just a silly girl, but I think there is a problem with your proof, DeoreDX. (Nice shoes, sweetie!)

"First we state that girls require time and money."

In the language of mathematics, the word require doesn't translate into an equality, honeybuns. What you seem to be saying is something more along the lines of:

G = { x | t(x)>0, m(x)>0 }

I guess you took all that calculus and didn't spend enough time on set theory! So let me try to explain it to you, sweetiepie. The set of girls, G, contains elements x such that (that's what that vertical bar means, such that) some function -- you do know what a function is, right sugarbear? -- of time dependent on x called t (see how we write that t(x)? you read it aloud as "t of x") is positive -- I thought nonnegative would not be strict enough (the little alligator eats the bigger number, remember? it's called greater than) -- and (the comma is a shorthand for and) some function of money dependent on x -- snookums, I hope remember dependent variables -- called m(x) is also positive.

When you state that "time is money", are you implying an equivalence relationship? Why didn't you prove this? It's easy to show an equavilence relation, muffin; just prove
(1) x ~ x for all x in G (reflexivity),
(2) if x ~ y, then y ~ x (symmetry), and
(3) if x ~ y and y ~ z, then x ~ z (transitivity).
Now find an ~ such that G is partitioned into equivalence classes with xt = xm for all x in G. (Yes, toots, algebraists usually precede the mapping with the dependent variable in order to get rid of the ucky parentheses.)

Your immaturity in humor is only surpassed by your callowness in mathematics. However, you have a keen eye for dapper footwear. If you leave the math to me, I'll be your sugarmomma, keeping your feet fashionable forever!

(Troll pic available upon request.)”

“Wow Dizzy.. my head is spinning....

Where's the uberfootgear guy when you need him!

Or are you really DDX in disguise AGAIN?!”

“The drain plug question: I would have used a toilet plunger, putting my finger under the edge while I pushed down to prevent further pressure on the stopper, then pulling it up swiftly to remove said stopper.

As for the rest:

Too......much......math.....melting.....can't take it.....any longer.....


< poof >”

“LOL

I'm still waiting for DDX to give me his answer before I give the solution...

Come on guys... it shouldn't take 2 days to figure it out!”

“How to remove a stopper? Don't be silly! Ask a man to do it for you! :)”

“I am struggling with the m(x)>0. In engineering economics, cash flow in (benefit) is positive and cash flow out (cost) is negative. I think one of the money factors is negative.

So, if m(x)<0, then depending on how you treat a few of the steps, the original proof could really come down to SQRT(-evil^2), which is an imaginary number. Frankly, ending up with an imaginary number makes more sense to me anyway.

DizzyDelilah - Do you use "|" to symbolize "such that" or "given that"? ...or does it make any difference?
last edited: 5/11/05 11:15:50 AM”

“"DizzyDelilah - Do you use "|" to symbolize "such that" or "given that"? ...or does it make any difference?" --Phil

Either is acceptable, Phil! I've even seen the backwards-looking "e" instead of the "|", but it's not common inside the braces.”

“Mathmatical proofs are not required as some things do not lend themselves to this specific type of logic, or indeed any logic. The statememt "Girls = Evil" is a basic tenent of faith which, as everyone knows, requires no proof as the belief is evidence of proof enough.

As for the stuck stopper. Remove the water from the sink, removing the pressure holding the stopper in place and easily remove the offending plug from the drain. I should think a simple 2 horse power submursible pump would do the trick. Just run the business end of the evac hose out the window (which should be located above the sink).”

“I liked simer's solution.”

“Still haven't seen anyone come up with the simple solution to the stopper problem...

DDX must be in the closet counting and buffing his shoes... and looking for new ways to creatively troll....

No one gets a gold star, yet! :-)”

“get a cup or heavy glass.
Fill with v/hot water.
Empty and put a flat cover on the top.
Tip upside down and place over plug.
Slide cover out.

Let pressure difference as container cools produce a vacumn to suck that sucker out.”

“Manuka,
I must say, that is one creative answer...
But the bottom of the stopper isn't entirely flat. I don't know if that would work in that instance.”

“Disassemble piping underneath sink. Use finger to poke stopper up. Use bucket to catch water.”

“OK, frustration mounts,

Get an electric drill, bore a hole in the stopper, stick a screwdriver in the hole and lever the damned thing out.

Cycle down to Home Depot and buy a new stopper. Put a retaining chain from the stopper pull around the faucet so this one cannot be put in upside down.”

“OK, frustration mounts,

Get an electric drill, bore a hole in the stopper, stick a screwdriver in the hole and lever the damned thing out.

manuka
3:56:25 PM
5/11/05
ignore this user
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

If you put the drill into a sink full of water, you'll probably be quite shocked at the result...”

“No, you said only 1 inch of water.

Average drill bit is about 3 inches, plus another inch and a half for the chuck.

No problem.

Unless you lied about the water depth ;-))

Then I would have to use a drill bit extender.

last edited: 5/11/05 3:32:59 PM”

“Yes, but in general, isn't it bad to use electric tools around water? (because of the back splash and possiblity of shocking oneself?”

“LOL Ok, fine, a hand drill would work too. ;-)”

“Just as a matter of general information, that's not me at the bottom of the drill.”

“How to drill under water...

”

“Nigal-- overkill, don't you think?”

“rather than a drill, just use a corkscrew to pull the damn thing out.”

“You guys are overthinking the problem... the solution is a lot simpler....”

“This might end up being a good joke...

e.g.

How many TTers does it take to remove an upside-down stopper from a sink with 1 inch of water..... ?”

“OK, fine pink, the joke's on us, prove how smart you are and tell us.”

“StoveStomper, Pinkbubelz would insist it is a brass plug to foil the corkscrew.

(go check the all women are evil thread)

If she suggests pushing down on one side to spin it I counter with the grid argument that it cannot turn, or the super wedgie argument that it will not spin.”

“super wedgie ... now there's something I can relate to. Darn thongs! :)”

“What, got some chafing problems ??
Need help with the lotion ??”

“You'll have to wait until tonight or tomorrow for the answer... ;-)

*** Final Jeopardy Music playing ***

1) NOpe, not a brass plug.
2) Yes, wedged in, cannot spin.”

“Tsk Tsk... I guess DDX is too busy "Delilahing" to answer the puzzle.

I'll post the answer at 5 p.m. EST... :-)”

“haha manuka wants to rub ddx all over with lotion!!!!”

“As promised, it's about 5 p.m. and here's the solution...

Gemini actually came the closest to it, it does involve a knife, but no stabbing or injury to the sink or rubber stopper...

I just wedged the knife between the stopper and the sink to break the "seal" and as soon as the water hit the gap, the stopper came out quite easily... :-)

Voila! No violation of fire-cracker laws, mutilation of pipes, vandalism of rubber stoppers, calling of plumbers or injury to the bystanders.... :-)

A simple solution to a simple problem... Just needed to do some creative problem-solving and think OUTSIDE of the box...


********************************************

i don't know..took a knife stabbed the sucker and pulled? pliers?

Heeheehee curious now”
Gemini
5:36:18 PM
5/10/05
ignore this user”

“And the answer to the question:

How many TTers does it take to get an upside-down rubber stopper out of a sink...

7 TTers and a Troll to sit around debating the issue (actually, there were 9 suggested solutions) and 1 to sneak in and take care of business!”

“and if the stopper had been metal your solution would not work.

The corkscrew suggestion would also work fine, no need to put it all the way through.”

“Yes, but I specified that the stopper was rubber in my original query... :-)

Also, the corkscrew would work as well, but my solution works without causing damage to the stopper, the sink or the knife... :-)”

“Bull hocky, a knife would both damage the rubber, and the edge of the knife blade on the sink drain.”

“maybe she's using a butter knife?”

“Yeah, we saw "Crocodile Dundee"

"This is a knife" LOL.

”

“I could fall in love with an australian....”

“yes, I guess I forgot to mention that it was a butter knife. ;-)”

“way to go, MacGyver! :P”

“Sorry DizzyDel-- you can't pry a stopper open with a stilleto... (or birkenstocks for that matter.)”

“PB, leave my lovely Birk's alone!

I have to go now. All this walking around Dallas is starting to get to me. The new pair of Columbia Sportswear Canyon Craze Cargo Shorts I bought from REI is way too big and its rubbing me the wrong way. I even got a boy's large!”

“A boy's large what?”

“Maybe that was a short boy's large?”

“*** speechless ***”