Random Observations from Father's Day We ekend 2005

“Random Observations from Father's Day weekend 2005


Patience and Irony


Car camping and a three mile loop.....the roomy tent......campfire........nature......home. Perfect. You'll teach the boy more about the outdoors. You'll teach him how to be a good man. You'll teach him about life---like your dad did for you.

"Look son, that's a basswood tree. See how big the leaves are?"
"Dad, when can we eat? I'm starving."

Sigh. "Okay son, let's go build a fire."

You're a fire master. You teach him about tinder, firestarters, allowing the flames to breathe---no big pieces of wood yet! Fire construction is an art.

"See that son? See how just a little bit of air makes the flame take off and spread to the other pieces?"
"Uh-huh. Dad, look at this spider. I think he's having a war with these ants. This one time, I saw a bunch of red ants......."

Sigh. "I'll get the hot dogs."

Campsites have a tendency to define campers. The wild bunch is over here. The animal lover with 4 barking dogs is camped over there. The retired folks in the giant camper with the generator, radio, television, plastic green "lawn" and pink flamingo lighting is next door.

"Can you believe that son? They're camping but they have a television! And they've chosen music for all the rest of us to hear! Can you believe that? That's not camping. Son? Son?"
"I'm in here Dad---in the tent playing Nintendo."

Sigh.

What's he going to be like when he grows up? Are you doing a good enough job? Does he hear the things you tell him? You turn on the flashlight because the other campers won't let you sleep.....you look at him sleeping there.....sleeping bag at his ankles......mouth wide open......baseball sized patch of drool on your favorite ultralight Thermarest that you just know is now going to be there forever......deep, deep breaths....oblivious to all of your worries. You wish you could sleep like that. But there's college to think about.

Walking the loop......to save him the discomfert, you take the lead and lose count after eating 451 spiderwebs that have crossed the trail the night before.....you hear the groans behind you......"I'm thirsty"........."I need a break"......."this sure is a long way"........."another hill?"

Sigh

You walk the edge of the steep bluff overlooking the river. You point out distant hillsides......giant fir trees.....animal paths......you point out the winding river and tell him about how trout feed.....about why the river is slow in some spots and swift in others......you point out gravel beds and sandbars.

"Dad, when I was little," (he's currently 10) "the first time I heard the word sandbar, I thought it was a place to eat. I was staying at Mom's house and we were on a boat with her friend and he said to keep an eye out for the sandbar and I thought 'oh good, I'm hungry.' Dad, what would happen if we rolled a big rock down this hill?"

Sigh.

You drive home deep in thought while he sleeps. Was I like him when I was little? I listened to my dad, didn't I? I paid attention, right? I learned from him, I'm sure of it. I must have been an easy kid to raise. Did my father have these same thoughts? No, he couldn't have! How did I learn the things I know, if not from him?

You put the gear away and air out the sleeping bags and tent.....you spare him the "musty smelling tent" speech so he doesn't have to miss the cartoon super-mega-marathon. You sit in the chair in front of the computer.....you check your e-mail......you check the UPS tracker for the whereabouts of your latest gear order......you log into Trail Talker under the handle "Nonconformist".

Nonconformist?

Then you smile. A sheepish smile. An embarrassed smile.

You're glad you and he rolled that big rock down the steep hill.”

“lol. Nice nc!

What we appreicate about camping (and the like) changes as we get older. He's only just begun.

Where were you camping?
I spent the weekend on the HCP near Atlanta. Beeeautiful weekend to be out!

BTW... Happy Father's Day.”

“Thanks TB.

We were up in the Pere Marquette Forest north of Baldwin. There are two little campgrounds on the Pine River with a little 3-mile loop that links them. Very nice, but the sites were packed and loud. But you're right, it was great to be out.”

“I understand your feelings completely. My daughter is nine and I am always trying to create these special, Hallmark moments for us to have together but they never work out the way I imagine.

For example: we live four miles away from the Shasta-Trinity National Forest and, while I love to spend time hiking the trails, playing in the creeks and exploring the woods, my little girl would rather plant herself on the busiest beach where hordes of people litter, play their music loud and are just generally disrespectful to nature.

I suppose one could just accept this as an opportunity to practice Buddhistic patience, but it is very difficult sometimes not to get disappointed.

But nonetheless, it sounds like you had a good time with your son. Happy Father’s Day.”

“Thanks Datura. We always make sure we have a good time.....I found out long ago that when you're introducing the young one(s) to your hobbies and interests, you can't expect to do things the way you normally do when you're alone or with other adults. Our first "fishing lesson" was 1% fishing and 99% chasing minnows in the shallows. It might leave you shaking your head from time to time, but at least you know what to expect.”

“Cute! Yupp...sort of like when I take my kids out....well...actually just like it...only difference is that I'm not a guy.

You're lucky, mine don't want to go camping as much...and forcing them is not fun.

Glad you had a great father's day.”

“Hey Gem, thanks. Lucky for me my son still thinks I'm the smartest and funniest person around which, of course, I am. So he enjoys doing what I do even if he isn't as religious about it as I am. (I even have him listening to Rush and AC/DC!)”

“Those campgrounds are something else eh? We stopped at Brighton Rec's Appleton lake rustic campground this weekend (it's really close to home and to a party we wanted to go to that day). One group chose the music (country western of course) and set the quiet hours for the entire campground.
It was a good time anyways. Great campfire weather this weekend!”

“Very cool, Nc.

My random observations were that I had to take my son to a swim meet and help time races, try not to freak out while he drove home, listen to my daughter philosophize about interior decorating, wait for the computer while she chatted with friends, watch a really stupid movie the kids had on tv, fix them dinner, and drive out to my wife's shop during the NBA game to take her the keys she left on the table.....not my choosing but pretty wonderful anyway.

The bonus was that since it was father's day I also got to browse through a gear store and sit on the lake in my kayak drinking beer.”

“/I think that as he gets older -he will look back on this time with a greater appreation of what you tried to instill in him-you will become proud -”

“Great post NC! A very enjoyable read.”

“NC, you have a future as an author. That was great!
I think we remember the times we were emotionally engaged during our childhood. Hopefully, there is a preponderance of happy times. Your son will remember the rock. He learned to give the gift of love.”