Looks like I could get a job in Britain

“Drinking Doesn't Get the Guy

Ladies, you can drink. But you can't do it in the presence of good-looking men.

That's the message Britain's Committee of Advertising Practice told liquor companies last week, after it decided some ads made too much of a connection between alcohol and sex.

Upset by an ad for Lambrini wine coolers that showed three fun-loving single gals "hooking" a hunky bloke, the prissy bureaucrats wrote, according to the Times of London: "We would advise that the man in the picture should be unattractive — overweight, middle-aged, balding etc."

In fact, the CAP's new rules forbid "the implication that drinking alcohol is essential to the success of a social occasion" and mandate that "links must not be made between alcohol and seduction, sexual activity or sexual success."

Several British advertising campaigns may be jeopardized by the rulings, including a $4 million contract George Clooney has with Martini brand vermouth.

Lambrini objected to the ruling, questioning whether balding, middle-aged and/or paunchy men who were still considered attractive, such as Sean Connery or Jack Nicholson, would be off limits.

"Beauty is, after all, in the eye of the beholder," reasoned Lambrini owner John Halewood.

First story”

“That's funny--women think I look like George Clooney when they're drunk.”

“That's funny to me too...when I'm drunk, I think women think I look like George Clooney.”

“Well my hair is going grey.”

“I've got enough grey hair for all three of you blokes.”