Did you earn a GBD today?

“FEBRUARY 17--This country, as you know, is filled with the deranged. And then there's Travis Frey, a 33-year-old Iowa man who is facing charges that he tried to kidnap his own wife (not to mention a separate child pornography rap). Frey, prosecutors contend, apparently is a rather demanding guy. In fact, he actually drew up a bizarre four-page marriage document--a "Contract of Wifely Expectations"--that sought to establish guidelines for his spouse in terms of hygiene, clothing, and sexual activities. In return for fulfilling certain requirements, Frey (pictured right) offered "Good Behavior Days," or GBDs. Each GBD, Frey wrote, could be redeemed by his wife to "get out of doing the things" he requested daily. A copy of the proposed contract, which Frey's wife never signed and later provided to cops, can be found below. While we normally point out the highlights of most documents, there are so many in this demented, and very graphic, contract, we really can't do it justice. So set aside ten minutes--and prepare to be repulsed. (4 pages)




http://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive/0217062contract1.html”

“It think this was posted last week, Sacco. Weird, though. Sounds like Bearmagnet and Chili morphed into one body, lol.”

“I got up, made coffee, and sausage crossiants (SP? WHO CARES ITS A FRENCH WORD) for the family this morning...wonder if I can get a break....”

“NO GBD for me ;)”

“dam!

i've been busy lately. i'll look for the thread.”

“The question is, Capt Dan, did you have your pantie hose and garters on while you made the croissants?
last edited: 2/21/06 7:48:43 AM”

“No Sass... I feel much better in the thong and pushup bra (LOL) God that hurt to imagine...sorry”

“More importantly, did you pronounce "croissant" correctly??”

“These are obviouse godless heathans who don't know how a man and wife are to behave.”

“pantie hose and garters

What a stupid idea.
Hose and garters are a whole nother thing! Ha!”

“If you're going to be a good heathen, you might as well be godless.”

“Yeah cause the panty part defeats the whole sex appeal of the garters.”

“Dude sounds like a real catch.”

“Oh shush.”

“Hee Hee Hee”

“After you dumped him, Lyra, the poor soul probably felt a need for a little more structure in his life.”

“lyra, is this why you and tarpy aren't married yet?

you having trouble getting him to sign your contract?”

“Actually Sass, foreplay is more "trip to the jewelry store/or horse shop and 30 minutes of begging" (LOL).....which is better than Scottish Foreplay,"BRACE YESELF MAGGIE."”

“Dump him? The only place I'd dump that character would be out of a moving car, or off a cliff, or into a vat of acid. LOL!!

MOOHAHA, how did you know about the contract, sacco???”

“If only monkeys could write...”

“i once new a dude that said it wasn't possible to rape your wife...we actually claimed that it was back up by the bible...i think he was all talk though”

“wouldn't surprise me thrifty. leviticus has some f-d up sheeyit.”

“Hey I always chortle when the Blood Mobile people ask "Have you ever paid for sex?" My reply used to by,"HEY I'M MARRIED, what do you think?"
But the best reply was to the question,"Have you ever had intimate relations with another man?" to which my engineer asked,"Does my Father count?"”

“I'm sorry.....WHAT ?!?!?!”

“Marital rape is a crime in all 50 states.”

“At the very minimum it should rate a free ass beating by the family of the wife....”

“anybody read gerald's game by king?

the dude was about to rape his wife, so she kicked him in the nads so hard she gave him a heart attack and he died. HA!”

“,"Have you ever had intimate relations with another man?"

you got better wording than i did...they asked me "have you ever had homosexual sex?"...that one threw me so bad that when they asked my weight i said 110 instead of 210...the lady looked at me, looked at her paper and then looked at me again and started to write it down...i realized what i said before she wrote it down”

“It is even better if you ask them to "explain what they mean".

Or as Chelsea Clinton told The Frigid Senator when asked about "if Chelsea had any action in college?"
Chelsea replied,"Not according to Daddy."”

“I scooped ya sacco ( http://www.thebackpacker.com/trailtalk/thread/30458,-1.php#1355494 ) but I like your title better.”

“i should have known V, but like i said, i've been busy lately and sorta outta the loop.

'sides a story like this is worth a rehash.”

“Sounds like Bearmagnet and Chili morphed into one body, lol.”
Nimblefoot
8:25:46 AM
2/21/06


Exsqueeze me?

My SO was very late for work today. It was her idea. I earned several GBD points.”

“That contract looks like a good start, but I only read the first few paragraphs.”

“dude, you can drop the SO thing now. just say wife. it'll only hurt for a little while.”

“Bear, you are like a man who has been hit by a .50 cal round and runs 200 yards. You are dead when the round hits, your body just doesn't know it yet (LOL). Sorry but go ahead give into the Horror.”

“LMAO!

We ain't gettin hitched 'til July! "SO" is easier to type, dammit!”

“bearmagnet is so whipped! ;-)”

“I think I earned two GBD's today. But I wont go into details ;O)”

““anybody read gerald's game by king?

the dude was about to rape his wife, so she kicked him in the nads so hard she gave him a heart attack and he died. HA!”
sacco

And then she got to watch, tied to the bed, as the dog ate her dead husband.
last edited: 2/21/06 7:37:39 PM”

“Okay gang, I got out of the weight room at 7PM raced home and made homemade, chicken basil tomato soup (from scratch)....you be the judge, can I have a GBD? (LOL)....And NO Nigal, I am not shaving NOTHING (LOL)”

“Capt. Dan, your SO is out of town so it doesn't count.”

“She who must be obeyed is back...she got back last night....”

“Okay, what else did you do for her? No need to be graphic. Generalities are acceptable.”

“Um I unloaded my sidearm and locked it in the lock box....(LOL) Actually I am helping the kids study (I have wireless internet in the house so I can work in the kitchen with them).

Why what else should I do.”