The My Dog is Bigger Than Your Dog Threa d

“I'll skip the small talk and head straight to the heart of all TT fuego threads......MY DOG IS BIGGER THAN YOUR DOG!!!!”

“HoneyDog goes from 85-100 pounds between seasons. What ya got?”

“Looks like Nigal's got me beat. Sadie weighs in at about 70lbs.”

“My Dog(s) are sweeter kinder, and more FUN than YOUR dog...Phftttttt!”

“I don't know SuperT, Honey's pretty hard to beat in that area too.

”

“Your wife's hair color matches your dog's!”

“Which hair?”

“Heck, I don't even have a dog. We're planning on moving this spring. We'll get one then.”

“Ifn you want a Chessie...let me know”

“My dog's a Chow... bring 'em on!”

“Your dogs might be bigger, but mine's faster, smarter, and better trained.

Oh, and BTW, my dog is POPULAR.”

“After listening to NPR one morning, my dog asked me ‘if Ira Glass could be more annoying.’ I told him I’d show him annoying and forced him to listen to Stephen R. Covey books on tape for the next two days, a move I now heartily regret since he’s since taken a proactive approach to ankle-biting.”

“My dog peed on Rush Limbaugh's prescription bottles.”

“I recently caught my dog watching C-SPAN.”

“My dog just quit his job as the script writer for The Colbert Report. He wants to devote more time to his nano-technology hobby. He's trying to develop nano-bots that will keep him free from ticks on hikes.”

“Although my dog hasn’t publicly complained about his crate, he’s recently been engaged in various late night remodeling projects. Some mornings, I’ll retrieve him from his crate only to find that he’s laid a new parquet floor or installed a hot tub.”

“I paid a professional dog trainer to teach me how to cope with several habits of a growing, highly-dramatic puppy, including biting, barking, and berating Colin Powell for being ‘such a sour puss.’ After two hours of his learning intense boot camp-like maneuvers, I sat my dog down and explained to him that things would be different from that point forward.
He promptly peed on the carpet.”

“You get my vote! Your dog stories are the best, Stove.”

“My new dog Abbi has issues with being tied up...(Mind ya, she's still mellow, but...)

I had to stake her out in the yard while I improved her pen last night,(Spin pin and a 20 foot lead gave her a 40 foot manuver area...) and this morning, I found she had been digging around the base of the stake...

serves me right for leaving the backhoe within her reach...”

“LOL....the chessies still have the "lock the car door" thing down pat. (LOL) CARRY SPARE KEY.

But by far their best manuver is "OPEN the Pantry door, Get food out and take it upstairs". Don't know why or what...but they are picking rather balanced meals.”

““Although my dog hasn’t publicly complained about his crate, he’s recently been engaged in various late night remodeling projects. Some mornings, I’ll retrieve him from his crate only to find that he’s laid a new parquet floor or installed a hot tub.”
StoveStomper
8:54:03 PM
11/08/06

LOL

I had to give up the crate with my dog. I was getting sick of putting the dog in the crate when I went to bed and waking up the next morning with the dog in my bed and me inside the crate.”

“My dog once called Thurston Moore (Sonic Youth) a ‘poncy-a$$ douche bag.’ I immediately washed his mouth out with soap.”

“message from StoveStomper being ignored”

“LOL..@lumber....

My Daughter taught her HUGE retriever to crawl up and put his head on the pillow....so on the weekends when they are out of town I am stuck knowing I will wake up looking in the snoot of a LARGE brown dog.”

“message from XL400236 being ignored”

“Not only does my dog speak, he knows how to form complex sentence structures in over 12 languages, including Russian, Hebrew, and American Sign Language. His favorite bedtime story is the Portuguese translation of L’Etranger, because ‘its portrayal of alienation and spiritual doubt’ reminds him of his first weeks on the streets.”

““LOL..@lumber....

My Daughter taught her HUGE retriever to crawl up and put his head on the pillow....so on the weekends when they are out of town I am stuck knowing I will wake up looking in the snoot of a LARGE brown dog.”
XL400236
9:53:35 AM
11/09/06

Well I guess I exaggerated a little, but the dog did learn how to open the crate from the inside. She also figured out how to open my bedroom door. Those dang herding breads are sometimes too smart for there own good.”

“message from StoveStomper being ignored”

“Last week, while I cradled my dog and sang lullabies into his floppy ears, he grimaced, made the ‘shhh’ motion by holding his paw over his mouth, and then suggested I not quit my day job.”

“brain matter from StoveStomper's very own brain being ignored”

“Cool - am I on ignore too, buddha bear???”

“My dog has his own account at Amazon.com. According to his most recent purchases, Amazon recommends that he try a Roy Orbison record, an anthology of Charles Bukowski poetry, or an outdoor Weber barbecue grill.”

“Lumber, what type pup you got?”

“message from Mutt being ignored
message from StoveStomper being ignored
message from XL400236 being ignored”

“Woohoo!”

“message from Mutt being ignored
“Woohoo!”
Mutt
9:08:56 AM
11/09/06
stop ignoring this user”

“XL, she's an Australian/German Shepard mix. I think there’s some lab in there too. I'll have to post some pictures of her some time.”

“When playing with other dogs in the neighborhood my dog typically hams up the fact that he’s the cutest four-legged mammal on the planet, bringing even the most demonic pit bull to its knees in adoration. However, when confronted with other similarly precocious, petulant puppies, he’ll sigh, stick his quivering black nose in the air and declare, ‘God, toddlers.’”

“LOL...Lumber what was the ad I saw for puppies. Mother Pedigree German Shepard, Father Sneaky Lab/Collie mix from next door. ”

“message from StoveStomper being ignored”

“One Saturday afternoon I bought my dog a pair of socks to keep his feet warm during the night. He grew out of the socks by 3 a.m. Sunday morning and had knitted a shawl by the time I took him out for his morning potty break. I was asked to hold the shawl while he ‘took care of his business.’”

“message from StoveStomper being ignored”

“Well when my dog takes a potty break she goes into the bathroom with the newspaper crossword and a PEN.”