Like Father, Like Son???

“There is always a tension between a parent's responsibility to know what is going on in a child's life, and the child's right to privacy. But that isn't what this post is about.

My not-quite-15-year-old son (one of my two, actually) frequently uses my computer and doesn't log off from his email. I usually just log him off, after (at the most) scanning the inbox to see who he is corresponding with. This morning, in a moment of weakness, I decided to see what he has been discussing, with a girl who I know he likes.

The last time I engaged in such espionage was close to a year ago. My son had saved an IM conversation in a text file. He may as well have said, "Hey, dad, check this out!" So I read it. Over an hour of almost complete silliness and inanity, except for the discussion about their physical relationship. Ouch, you say? Yes, here comes the good stuff. My son was (gasp!) discussing with his then-girlfriend…drum roll….how they could sit next to each other on the school bus, open a book across their laps, and hold hands under the book so no one could see. Yes, it was very cute. The kid had just turned 14, and was devising an elaborate plan to hold a girl's hand.

So, I wasn't too worried this morning when I checked out his email...not really suspicious or looking for a gotcha. I just wanted to get a little update on where he is with respect to courting a young woman.

And I found discussions of homework, self-discipline or the lack thereof, and … here it comes … sitting together in the lunchroom. Not quite as cute and innocent as the busride-hand-holding, but still cute, in a way. "I like sitting at your table." "Why did you stop?" "I felt I was invading." "Well you are officially invited. Because I have powers that way."

But the thing that really warmed my soul this morning was a little snippett that went something like this:

My son: "There was a really beautiful sunset this evening. Did you see it?"

Cute girl: "We get a great sunset almost every night! I love where we live!"

Imagine that! A young man, not quite 15, both appreciating a beautiful sunset, and wanting to share that with a special woman.

Like father, like son.

I am a proud and happy man.”

“nice Fritz. very nice.”

“Stories like that make my heart swell. :)”

“That's awesome Fritz.

By the way, nowadays, "holding hands" is code. I'll spare you the details.

Also, "sunset" means the drug ecstasy.

j/k
last edited: 11/30/07 8:22:20 AM”

“awesome. sounds like the kids been raised right”

“Good hearts!

Good souls!
last edited: 11/30/07 9:10:56 AM”

“Great!

BTW, it's probably good practice, whether you actually look at your kids' emails or not, to educate them that anything that you write in an email could potentially be read by someone else. I told B-Son this when he first got his own email and periodically remind him of this fact. He has no problem with me looking over his shoulder now and then.”

“Good story Fritz. You shuold be proud. I wish I had such a story of my own from that age, but they wouldn't be nearly as innocent.”

“Aside from their own personality, boys learn how to treat women and girls from their fathers.

Lookin' good, pal.”

“Good luck with all that. And don't take it too personally if he suffers a meltdown like most kids do.”

“Thanks, all.

Sarge, thanks for the tips. (Not!)”