New Supermarket

“The new supermarket near my house has an automatic water mister to keep produce fresh. Just before it goes on, you hear the sound of thunder and the smell of fresh rain.

When you approach the milk cases, you hear cows mooing and detect the scent of fresh hay.

When you approach the egg case, you hear hens cluck and cackle and the air is filled with the pleasing aroma of bacon and eggs frying.

The veggie department features the sound of a gentle breeze and the smell of fresh buttered corn.

I don't buy toilet paper there any more.”

“condoms ?”

“OH man I saw that coming so far out...but it was like watching a moron beat himself with a hammer....you just had to watch..THANKS FOR THE LAUGH.”

“what about feminine products?”

“ewww”

“what about feminine products?”
crash bang
10:29:30 AM
2/29/08

the sweet voice of a nagging woman”

“Dang bloody mess !!!”

“Nah just put it next to the Shrimp and Fish aisle and leave some of the products out of the fridge for a bit.....”

“I'm sure buying stool softeners and cold medicines must be downright pleasant, too.”

“diapers and other baby needs, smells like poop and sour milk and so loud your back aches from the noise.”

“how about those things for bladder control problems?”

“Of course they could have half naked coeds running up and down the Beer Aisle....”

“well in NY, at the register you hear a deep voice telling you to put your hands up because this is a robbery.



haha get it????”

“Does the beer aisle smell like a brewery?”

“LOL...”

“No. Urine.”

“Oh...you mean that "alley" smell.”

“I will have to defer to you on that chili. I don't hang out in many alleys.”

“Can you smell the chicken shlt as well as hear them cluck?”

“You only have to be in one once, bacpac, to have an indelible imprint on the smell.

Anyone who has been in the French Quarter would recognize it immediately.”

“Isn't the French for "alley", "le urinale"?”