Monket Butt Cream

“I will never, EVER go hiking again without this incredible anti-monkey-butt cream ! !




It'll sting a little, but by morning you'll be a new man.....er, or a woman”

“monkey butt is for amateurs.”

“Monkey butt is what you get hiking when your good buddy leaves your good pants in the truck and you get like diaper rash.

I had it bad and didn't know what to do because I never got it before. The Gold Bond kicked it's a$$.

The End”

“hey, you made the cat burrito comment so i figured it was fair game. ;)”

“Why don't you come over and say that, booger eater?”

“yeah I guess you're right....I'm going to try calico flavor next time...”

“hehe”

“I could've sworn that read "Bucket Mutt Cream".”

“"monket butt" is the french spelling”

“what is this monkey butt thing? i've never had it.”

“I've never used the cream. I take along a travel size of the Gold Bond medicated powder though. Usually, some preventative maintenance goes a long way.”

“NSFW
http://www.fugly.com/media/IMAGES/Babes/butt-monkey.jpg
last edited: 10/12/09 4:23:04 PM”

“Nice.”

“Gold Bond medicated powder smells like freeze dried old people”

“When I rode across the state of Kansas in June, they were selling "Shammy Butter" by the gallon. Luckily, this amateur didn't use the product and didn't need it.”

“Something that always works wonders for me is the hand sanitizer.

A while back Birch and I discussed entering into a business together making a special powder just for hikers. We couldn't agree on weather it would be sold as Chode Bond or Golden Gooch so the partnership was dismissed before it ever got off the ground.”

“This could perhaps explain the irritability.”

“Gold Bond foot powder is the bomb.


Yeah, I don't think I've ever had monkey butt since my first few trips. Maybe it really is for amateurs.”

“I used glide on my last hike for the first time to stave off the chaffe that started about three days into the hike. Worked like a charm.

Good wicking undies help keep the moisture at bay as well.”

“Stomper is now also known as the Monkey Butt Creme Lady”

“Nothing quite like pouring some rubbing alcohol down your crack in camp to put the monkey butt in its place. Kills all that nice bacteria that causes it. And...

Wait for it, wait for it...


MOTHER FRAKIN' SON of a BATCH that stings!”

“Yeah...and stabbing yourself in the eye with a nail is a nice finish too.”

“Cleanliness, cleanlines, cleanliness, children.

Also, wet wipes and vaseline.”

“why "the wolf"?”

“Dunno, it's an army term.”

“Vaseline?!?!?

Holy shyte!!

First the waxing kit..........now what?

Why the wolf?
I suppose its something like having the wolf at your back door.”

“The word for a male cat (Kater) is also a hangover. Go figure.”